Let me take you through 6 months of the worst time of my life.
I'm a M26 - very religious (used to lead prayers, give duroos in the Masjid, etc). Over the past few years my family (particularly my mother) started getting very critical, saying things like I'm being too picky with women cause I keep rejecting women she sends my way. This got to my head. Maybe I was being too picky? She kept telling me to consider marrying this one relative from our home country. It's a poor country, you can give her a good life in the west, and look at what a good deed that is.
Looked at the photos, literally only 1 photo she looked okay-ish. All the other ones I didn't like the way she looked. But hey, my family is telling me I'm being picky, maybe they're right. And I can get her out, and give her a better life? Maybe she just doesn't look good in photos but in real life she's attractive.
Okay you know what, lets do this thing. Mother keeps telling me, "Hey you won't be able to talk to her for a lot, her family is very conservative, okay? So make your decision quickly."
I speak to her on the phone. We speak for 1.5 mins or 2 mins, then she darts away. I didn't really get to properly see her. The lighting was terrible. Oh lord. I can't make a decision. We arrange another talk.
Next time, I speak to her on the phone they didn't open the camera. I am such an idiot, why would I even agree to such a conversation? We talked for 40 mins or so - just basic stuff.
Third time, I didn't speak to her but her mother.
After that third call, ladies and gentlemen, I am now an engaged man because I am an absolute DUMBASS. Who gets engaged to a girl after only having talked to her on the phone? Yeah, it's me. I can't visit - so the engagement was done in the homeland without my presence.
After my engagement, because we're now "official", I am apparently now able to talk to her. She gets on the camera. Oh God... She is not my type. I am not attracted. She is not my type. I can finally see her properly. It's okay, maybe if I look at her from this angle? I don't know? Lets just find something else to like about her. You gave your word. You're engaged. You can do this.
For the next 5-6 months we talk about once a week. I slowly begin to realise that there is literally nothing to talk about with this girl. Our age difference is big (she's much younger than I am), we have none of the same hobbies, she is not religious (she asked me what a niqab is when I started talking about it...),
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So my older sister gives me no room to disappoint her. Years ago, when I couldnโt afford the dress ($250) for their wedding (plus travel and hotel) they did nothing but belittle, guilt trip and yell at me for it. I offered to video tape the wedding for them, since I couldnโt afford to be in it. Video is a passion of mine and I couldโve made them a beautiful wedding video. Their response? โWell we wouldnโt want you to put it on youtubeโ โฆ what? (Because I used to post a lot of edits on YouTube at the time)
Now, the DAY we were putting our family dog of almost 20 years to sleep, her husband is flooding our family group chat about how no one cares about her. Sheโs alienated. Sheโs the outsider. They live over an hour away from the rest of us so, yes we do see them less. But thatโs not our fault. They have 3 kids. Their lives are busy, butโฆ somehowโฆ our fault.
But the day we are putting our dog to sleep (which she chose to not even make the drive for) my BIL decides is the perfect day to guilt trip and yell at all of us over text?
My sister recently invited my husband and I to a concert they had won free tickets to. We agreed. Fast forward a couple weeks, my mental and physical health is in the gutter. I have horrible anxiety and can barely leave my house. I canโt sleep at night and am in horrible physical pain (another health problem Iโd rather not get into) She texts me asking if weโre still good to go (concert being 2 weeks away). I say Iโm unsure of making any commitments right now so maybe itโs best to cancel. I apologize and say I really didnโt want to cancel, and ty for the invite.
She then says in our FAMILY CHAT how rude it was and that THIS is what her husband was talking about the day our dog died - that we donโt care about her. And that we should all just have fun with each other. I again apologized a said I didnโt want to cancel, but felt it was responsible to. She also said they paid money for these tickets which is a flat out lie. My husband after reading the message even said to me โI thought they won the tickets?โ So it wasnโt me imagining it.
I am not sure what to even do or say at this point. Like what is this? Where do I go from here?
My husband and I are having our postponed wedding (yeah 2020 to thank for that) next year and they were both supposed to play big roles in it. Now I am tempted to fill those roles with different people without a word. In fact, if it were up to me, I wouldnโt want them there at all. But I know thatโs imp
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Sorry for taking so long to get on board. Stubborn habits die hard!
After over a year of b*s nonsense on Yahoo - including deleted postings - I figured it's time.
Believe I'm #557. Hopefully better late than never. Sleep well & GLTA!
P.S. I can't wait to catch up with some long time posters. :)
HINT: HORROR / THRILLER.... Released post 2005
HINT: IT'S NOT A HOUSE-CAT but IT'S IN THE HOUSE
HINT: THIS CAT ROARS
After some introspection (right word?ยฟ), I've decided im quitting this shit forever. Fuck porn, fuck tik tok, fuck all the poisonous apps fucking our brains over.
Officially around 20 hours clean, will be checking in after 1 week off this shit.
And on which account am i posting this? My alternate reddit account i made to watch porn. Wow. Already realizing how terrifyingly addictive that shit is. Deleted everything, unsubscribed to every subreddit. Im here to stay
Thanks for enlightening me, you are awesome
https://www.reuters.com/markets/us/exclusive-trumps-social-media-venture-seeks-1-billion-raise-sources-2021-12-01/?s=09
Every time a group of Boingoloids conducts an album-ranking survey, Dark at the End of the Tunnel ties for last place with Boingo. I imagine that this is the case because such a huge percentage of the band's fanbase hails from the 80's and 90's SoCal indie scene, and they tend to prefer the ska/punk flavor of the first few albums. They also tend to not get too far into Danny's instrumental/score work.
On the other end of the spectrum, there are the Elfman The Film Composer fans, who might not even know a whole lot about Boingo, and who tend to skew younger and are not geographically related. I go so far as to sometimes think of there being two different Dannys; Boingo Danny and Movie Danny. They have different lives and personalities. One is the creepy doll-collecting weirdo of our hearts, and the other walks red carpets and reluctantly attends award shows.
I don't know what percentage of the fanbase is in my demographic (mid-40's, female, from the deep South), but I first learned about Boingo (and became instantly obsessed) in the summer of '93, right at the time the band ended, and Danny's composing career became his full-time thing. The only studio album I got to buy on release day was Boingo, and I had just turned 17. I had no idea until months later that the Danny Elfman whose film scores I was already listening to on repeat for half of my life at that point (on cassette, no less), was this golden voiced weirdo who seemed to write album after album of songs I identified with deeply. I tend to view Danny as some kind of half-crazed living musical saint.
I never got to see the boys all play together, but I HAVE managed to see Danny several times (twice with Steve), and Boingo Dance Party/Oingo Boingo Former Members live, so I can at least die knowing I've seen the most of the gang... just not at the same time.
All of the above is just a long way (sorry) of saying that I consider myself a rabid Oingo Boingo fan, and an equally rabid Danny Elfman fan. Dark is, in my opinion, the perfect, exquisite balance point between Oingo Boingo as a band, and Danny Elfman as a composer.
Production quality on Dark is excellent. That whole last triad of albums, Boi-Ngo, Dark, and Boingo had a certain quality of mix/polish that was lacking in earlier releases (I am not a music nerd, so this is the subjective opinion of a layperson).
One of my favorite things about Dark is the really introspective, darker tone of the lyrics on nearly the entire album. W
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My heart is moved for those of you who are hurting today & those who are poor or without a home. Iโm praying for you, that you feel Godโs presence in your space & He fills your heart with His joy that cannot be found on this earth. Numbers 6:24-26 comes to mind:
>The Lord bless you, and keep you; The Lord cause His face to shine on you, And be gracious to you; The Lord lift up His face to you, And give you peace.โ
You are so loved! May you have a gentle and peaceful Christmas!
Edit, lol: moses was talkin shit about this subreddit today(link) . Idc if people think my post is cringe. Itโs relevant to the public discussion of h3 on this sub. Now if you can do me a favor and step off my dick that would be greeat thxx โญโฉโฎส โ ๏น โ สโญโฉโฎ
Another Edit: getting called names by incels in the comments! They think i am too emotionally attached to the situation and am contributing to the overall problem (โ ^O^โ )(VโแดฅโV) I guess that could be true. Iโm just bored, locked inside from a looming hurricane, and the past week of h3 drama has been one of the rare sources of entertainment.
Moses, if you are reading this, I am sorry. I think you are a great guy and did the right thing. I especially think you are super โฆ. #SIKE!! BOSS MAN ETHAN!!
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