I told my brother ten jokes to make him laugh...
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︎ Dec 27 2020
My brother had to quit his job as a weightlifter because he wasn't strong enough.
He handed in his too weak notice yesterday.
π︎ 13k
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︎ Nov 13 2020
My brother always takes the stairs, but I prefer taking the elevator.
I guess we are raised differently.
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︎ Jan 02 2021
What do you call the wife of an elephantβs motherβs brother?
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︎ Jan 08 2021
Twin brothers just had a birthday
One turned twenty. The other turned twenty too.
(Trust me it works when you say it out loud)
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︎ Dec 31 2020
Did you know Aaron Burr had a brother who was always falling over?
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︎ Dec 04 2020
My half brother is 6ft 3inches...
Just imagine if he was a full brother.
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︎ Dec 28 2020
Know what the female equivalent of blood brothers are?
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︎ Jan 08 2021
My dad asked me to hand out invitations for my brothers surprise birthday party...
That's when I realised he was the favourite twin.
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︎ Dec 17 2020
My brother was addicted to the Hokey Pokey...
But luckily he turned himself around.
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︎ Dec 19 2020
I hear that Legolas from the Lord of the Rings had an older brother, but he died before Legolas was born.
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︎ Dec 30 2020
What did Poseidon say to his brother?
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︎ Dec 14 2020
I asked my brother how his date went. He said he found out she was an anesthesiologist.
Talk about a snooze fest.
π︎ 7
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︎ Dec 18 2020
My brother lost his left arm and left leg in a terrible auto accident.
π︎ 8
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︎ Dec 16 2020
If my brother gets his legs amputated...
Does that make him my half brother?
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︎ Dec 11 2020
Just read an interesting fact - Bruce Lee had a vegan brother;
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︎ Jun 27 2020
If Marioβs brother died, would he contact him through a Luigi board?
π︎ 3
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︎ Dec 04 2020
I just got a ps5 for my little brother.
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︎ Oct 29 2020
My brother just admitted that he broke my favourite lamp
I'm not sure I'll be able look at him in the same light ever again
π︎ 22
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︎ Nov 25 2020
I read a story about twin brothers born with a single body and shared organs.
Age 6 they were separated in a successful 13hr surgery. Later in life they went to prison for armed robbery. They served 10yrs. Afterwards they wrote their book about being ex-con joined twins.
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︎ Nov 26 2020
My brother went to jail. He didn't take it well. Started insulting and attacking everyone and threw his own feces on the walls.
I don't think we'll play Monopoly with him again.
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︎ Sep 08 2020
Talking with my brother: βHey remember when we would see how far we could jump off the staircase?β
βThat just sounds like leaping off ledges with extra stepsβ
π︎ 3
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︎ Dec 15 2020
I told my kids, "Did you know Albert Einstein had a brother that was an evil scientist who created a monster from body parts and his name wasβ¦"
π︎ 7
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︎ Dec 06 2020
My brother told me this one ;-;
My great uncle died the other night. He lost too much blood and the doctors couldn't find a donor because they didn't know his blood type. However, the whole time, my great uncle was cheering them on saying, "Be Positive!"
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︎ Oct 30 2020
My 8 year old brother made this one: How does the fish cross the road?
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︎ Nov 30 2020
I never wanted to believe that my brother was stealing from his job as a road worker
but when I got home, all the signs were there
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︎ Aug 29 2020
Last year I recorded a video with my brother
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︎ Dec 03 2020
My brother who works in a tannery has gone missing. We haven't seen hair nor hide of him.
π︎ 4
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︎ Oct 26 2020
What is the name of Satan's long lost brother?
π︎ 8
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︎ Nov 01 2020
My brother dug a hole in the ground, filled it with water then designed a moving staircase that was powered by it.
That well escalated quickly!
π︎ 23
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︎ Oct 31 2020
Found out martial arts expert Bruce Lee had a vegan brother
π︎ 90
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︎ Sep 03 2020
My brother and I laugh at how competitive we were as kids.
π︎ 11k
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︎ May 12 2020
Parents:Your brother wanna major in chemistry. Me: BrO
π︎ 6
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︎ Oct 20 2020
What's was JosΓ©'s brother called?
π︎ 5
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︎ Nov 22 2020
My brother wants to try skydiving so I warned him that...
It has so many downfalls.
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︎ Sep 29 2020
My brother just had twins so I invited him to join the group.
π︎ 4
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︎ Nov 19 2020
My brother and I are on a tight deadline to make Dracula action figures.
I have to make every second Count.
π︎ 12
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︎ Oct 27 2020
A real conversation between my brother and his wife + me
Brother: Babe, we need to eat all the pears, theyβre going to go bad soon.
SIL: but I donβt like pears, you can eat the rest of them...
Brother: I donβt think I can eat the rest of them by myself though...
Me, from another part of the room: well you better pre-pear yourself!
*ugly laughs from the couch
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︎ Oct 12 2020
Apparently, Neil deGrasse Tyson has a brother, who has a very successful grass-cutting business.
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︎ Aug 12 2020
My brother, whoβs a cowboy, always sits on the stove when he visits us.
He says that it makes him feel more at home... on the range.
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︎ Nov 16 2020
My brother hated going to jail
He refused to eat or drink anything, spat on everyone and covered the walls with his own feces...
We never played monopoly again.
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︎ Oct 14 2020
My footless brother stepped all over a freshly hatched anthill
Guess you could say he's lack-toes in toddler ants
π︎ 2
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︎ Nov 08 2020
I once convinced my younger brother to swallow a small flashlight
I got in so much trouble but it was worth it to see his little face light up.
π︎ 6
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︎ Oct 22 2020
My brother prefers to take the stairs but I prefer the escalator.
I guess we were raised differently.
π︎ 46
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︎ Nov 20 2020
my brother in law was addicted to the hokey pokey. it took him a while but eventually he...
π︎ 13
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︎ Nov 20 2020
Just read an interesting fact - Bruce Lee had a vegan brother.
π︎ 145
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︎ Sep 05 2020
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