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In the course of reading and re-reading the same handful of stories over and over at every bedtime (despite my daughter having SO many books), it's hard to turn off the critical reader in me and not give them the full academic treatment. These are those thoughts:
- Jeez, Mickey Mouse and his friends go on a ton of picnics...like what do they actually do to sustain this lifestyle and do they do anything else?
- Why is a book with Minnie Mouse on the cover still 80% centered on or driven by Mickey?
- Wait a minute. Curious George walked dogs, delivered papers, washed windows, handed out brochures, and raked leaves...but only earned $5.00 from all of that. I can't tell if this story is outdated or way too up-to-date...is Curious George capitalist propaganda? Were the Reys trying to prepare my child for a life of working minimum wage and liking it? Is the Man with the Yellow Hat just The Man? Should I push for a raise at work? Am I George?
- Oh, that's a really good rhyme scheme. The Llama Llama really needs a Pulitzer.
- Was I too judgmental of Mickey and his friends about the picnics? They're young. They don't have kids. Fresh in relationships. Enjoying each other's company. Have I become a grouchy and jealous old man, angry to see other people having fun? I really need to text my friends and catch up with them.
- There's a typo. I wonder if Disney would pay me for reporting it? Or, send a hit squad to my house.
- Shoot, I didn't say that sentence with the right inflection. Did she notice? She never notices. I noticed. I'm reading it out loud again correctly.
- I can't do the Donald Duck voice. Why do I keep trying?
- Are you sure you want to read that story (which I know has precisely 15 pages in it) when I know you love this story (which I know has precisely 14 pages in it)?
- Okay, hold up here. Minnie, Daisy, Donald, and Goofy have been dreading this picnic all day because they don't want to share their lunches. They are visibly unhappy when Mickey meets them, and they effectively communicate their needs. But, BUT. This truth makes Mickey sad. So, the four of them decide to put their valid feelings aside to make the one him happy? What? Is that a good lesson for my daughter to learn? Put aside your feelings and endure something you don't like for the sake of not upsetting someone who isn't harmed at all by your rejection? Hmm, this book may need to disappear...
- This library book smells so good.
Thanks for being an out
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Don't get distracted by the noise surrounding volatile markets.
Who cares if Nasdaq dips and drags bitcoin along? Don't worry if inflation soars debasing fiat currencies? Who cares if there is unrest in Kazakhstan? Quit searching for people that confirm your anchor beliefs on YouTube, reddit, or other medias.
Here is your bedtime story to help you sleep well & understand why Silver prevails.
A man is traveling down the road on foot. He has nothing but a backpack.
A robber on horseback approaches the man on foot and points his gun to the traveler and says, "Surrender your wallet and backpack" - The victim surrenders his wallet and backpack then the robber continues, "Now give me your shirt" - The victim surrenders his shirt then the robber continues, "Now give me your shoes!"
- The victim exclaims, "You've taken all I have my wallet, my backpack, my shirt; AND NOW YOU WANT MY SHOES?"
- The robber says "GIVE ME YOUR SHOES" ...so the victim surrenders his shoes and the robber disappears on his horse as the victim is left empty.
But then the victim rejoices "Alas, I have never felt so well, for these shoes had been killing my aching feet and I am now forever FREE"
I tell the story above as a metaphor for how us Silver Stackers feel, there are people stealing from us but in the end we will be liberated!
We all know the Gold to Silver Ratio. We all know that the silver mines today are shitty compared to the silver mines 500 years ago. We all know that industrial demand for silver today is 1,000 times more than a decade ago. Moreover, Silver yield was significantly greater 100 years ago while demand is exponentially amplified today thus the street value of silver surpasses Gold. Here is the comparison, there is a rare berry in the rain forest that will heal you but the rain forest is 5% of what it used to be.
Remember Apes, that is easier to mine Gold than Silver thus it is rational to discern the following: SILVER IS MORE VALUABLE THAN GOLD
DO THE FUCKING MATH. KEEP STACKING. WE ARE WINNING.
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My kids and I have a ritual where I tell them a story every night. Usually it’s princesses and unicorns. However I realized they are getting repetitive. So I’m a jam I decided to tell my kids the story of the Cooks assistant. They loved it and they wanted to go to the kings birthday soon. That was last night and they couldn’t wait for story time tonight. Since goblins can be perceived as scary to a 4 and 2 year old little girl I decided to substitute them for teddy bears that were arguing about what color shirt to wear. They were laughing and just so stoked. Thank you osrs for giving me great stories to tell me kids at the end of the night after being completely exhausted from the day to day grind. Any suggestions on what story to tell tomorrow?
BEDTIME STORIES ALBUM SURVIVOR.
"Are you ready, motherfuckers?" Iconic album Bedtime Stories, your time has come for elimination rounds!
HOW IT WORKS: Each round, you must vote for your LEAST FAVORITE song. The option with the most votes is eliminated in the next round, and so forth, until only 1 song remains.
For your vote, consider album version of songs only. No remixes or live versions.
And, leave a comment to explain your choice this round! Fun discussion is the goal, not picking "the best" Madonna song. Please refrain from downvoting another commenter's song choices. Music taste is subjective and sentimental, so the goal is discussion over downvotes!
>>>VOTE OUT YOUR LEAST FAVORITE HERE<<<
ALBUM TRACKS LEADERBOARD:
| RANK | SONG | VOTES | PERCENTAGE |
|---|---|---|---|
| 11th Place | |||
| 10th Place | |||
| 9th Place | |||
| 8th Place | |||
| 7th Place | |||
| 6th Place | |||
| 5th Place | |||
| 4th Place | |||
| 3rd Place | |||
| 2nd Place | |||
| 1st Place |
Track list:
I absolutely LOVE the soft vocals she put on this song . Specifically when she vocalized ‘’but this heartache’’ 😭. I just wish she gave us more of the vocals throughout her discography. This is one of the only songs that has this type of vocal specifically. Unless I missed some songs in her discography that have this vocal style? I would love if she did it in future work possibly. Are their any songs in her discography that have that vocal styling? You can tell me if any unreleased has it too
My wife is no Phan nor Deadhead but she tolerates both… to a point - usually until she falls asleep… which is what happened tonight…
Now I have to explain that one night after she’d ingested enough THC to keep her interested she somehow convinced herself Paige’s real name is Gary. And since that night, she don’t mind it quite as much when Gary is gettin all weird with it…
Well tonight was a gummy plus pen night and as she woke from her pre-bed stoner nap she roused and stated:“Goodnight Jerry!”
11/22/97 Haley’s Comet was playing on the TV….
Feeling hesitant I corrected her - “Oh hon…. That’s Gary and Trey…”
She replied “Ahhh! I think Gary is great… but I love Jerry so much more!!”
We then floated her into the bedroom where she explained Trey and Gary were pretty OK but that Jerry deserved all the praise cause of how good a person he was….
Then she serenaded herself to sleep with loosely related harmonies somewhere between the two bands, lyrics focused on how good her water tasted….
Not gonna lie - I love this woman and 100% realize how lucky I am!!!
I am the author of ASMR Bedtime Stories for Adults by Lavender Liber, and I have some US and UK free codes to give away.
This audiobook is a collection of 10 soothing short stories designed to calm your mind and help you relax/fall asleep.
Please only request a code if the following applies to you:
- You enjoy listening to a softly spoken voice as you fall asleep/relax
- You would like to listen to pleasant, gentle stories that contain descriptions of ASMR triggers (the stories are designed to help you fall asleep, so if you’re looking for exciting tales and riveting plot lines this book is NOT for you)
- You intend to leave a review (I would be very grateful for your support!)
Before requesting, please check out the full book description, and be sure to listen to the audio sample to see if you like the narrators voice and reading style here:
EDIT: It’s been brought to my attention that the sample on the US site isn’t currently working and I’m trying to resolve the issue with Audible. Please listen to the sample on the UK site. Thanks!
Comment or message if you would like a code, and let me know if you’re in the US or UK.
Thanks!
God, it's been a long time since I last posted something, but I suddenly felt inspired. As always, corrections and constructive criticism are very much appreciated. Hope you enjoy :)
"What happened to him? He is so pale!"
"I do not know. The last time I talked to him, he was breaking about working on one of these high-end luxury cruise ships."
"But what could possibly scare him that much on a cruise ship?"
"I wish I knew."
Both Trosch and Lakche looked across the mess hall at their old nest brother Garkko. The third reptiloid was as pale a sheet. Almost all colour had drained out of his scales, a sign of fear. Usually, his colour should return after whatever scared him had passed. The problem was, that Garkko had been in this state ever since he returned to their companies space station three rotations ago.
"Maybe we should just ask him?"
"Well, you go then!"
"What! Why not you?"
"It was your idea, so you go and ask him!"
"Alright, alright! I will go!"
Reluctantly Trosch got up from his chair and made his way across the room. With some hesitation, he took a seat opposite of Garkko, who was sitting alone.
"Hey, Garkko.", Trosch tries. Garkko looked up, slightly confused that someone tried to approach him.
"So", Trosch continued a little awkward, " I could not help but notice that you are not doing so well. Did something happen during your last assignment?"
"Terrans.", was Garkkos only answer. Troschs scales flashed blue in a moment of shock. Terrans! Of course, it had to be Terrans! Wherever something weird, crazy or scary happened, Terrans were not far away. If Terrans were involved in whatever happened to Garkko, anything could have happened. By now, Trosch was scared to ask for any more details. As it turns out, he doesn't need to, as Garkko soon continued talking.
"Why?!", Garkko screamed with terror in his voice, making the other visitors of the mess hall jump, "Why would someone tell stories of people getting eaten alive by monsters?! To their younglings?! Why would anyone do this?!"
By now almost everyone in the mess hall was starring at Garkko with various degrees of terror. For a moment there was complete silence within the room, then a slight chuckle could be heard. Trosch looked up to locate the source of the sound. At last, his eyes landed on a small group of Terran sitting in a corner of the room. Judging by their uniforms, they worked as security on some of the course ships. Trosch stared at them for a moment, before his scal
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I am a 27 year old women and I just had my first bedtime story! My parents where abusive growing up and all I had at bedtime was screaming. My husband grew up with songs and stories for bedtime. His Father, an actual Father, a priest, was a huge J.R Tolkin fan and read him all the books and so much more.
Christmas is my husband's favorite time of year, and I am in a very PTSD mood tonight. To make me feel "more in the spirit" he read me "A Candle In The Forest". Its the first bedtime story, and Christmas story, I was ever read. His grandmother read this story to a large group of kids every year. She is no longer with us.
This is a first for me. Ever. I am so privileged and honored that he read this to me. Or any story to be honest. I cried. He cried. It was wonderful. He said he would read to me more so I could experience something he grew up with. This is the best thing ever.
Wouldn't it be better if I gave you up?
Are you surprised?
BEDTIME STORIES ALBUM SURVIVOR.
HOW IT WORKS: Each round, you must vote for your LEAST FAVORITE song. The option with the most votes is eliminated in the next round, and so forth, until only 1 song remains.
For your vote, consider album version of songs only. No remixes or live versions.
And, leave a comment to explain your choice this round! Fun discussion is the goal, not picking "the best" Madonna song. Please refrain from downvoting another commenter's song choices. Music taste is subjective and sentimental, so the goal is discussion over downvotes!
>>>VOTE OUT YOUR LEAST FAVORITE HERE<<<
ALBUM TRACKS LEADERBOARD:
| RANK | SONG | VOTES | PERCENTAGE |
|---|---|---|---|
| 11th Place | Don't Stop | 20 | 47.6% |
| 10th Place | I'd Rather Be Your Lover | 13 | 29.5% |
| 9th Place | |||
| 8th Place | |||
| 7th Place | |||
| 6th Place | |||
| 5th Place | |||
| 4th Place | |||
| 3rd Place | |||
| 2nd Place | |||
| 1st Place |
Tracklist:
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