OK, so this is more about working life (I guess), but it happened in a call center, so-hey. I'll post it here and see what happens. If someone thinks it belongs in a different sub (TIFU, maybe?) please let me know in the comments if I should move it and I'll take it on over there. (I'm not moving it now, too many discussions and comments.)
I met my friend Mika when I worked for a cellphone call center. Our cubicles were right across from each other and we just hit it off. She was one of those spunky and outspoken girls who never meet a stranger, and her girlfriend (Stacy) was an artistic and sweet girl with a biting sense of humor. I worked there for two years and we got to be really close friends. Mika and Stacy would come over to hang out after work and eventually we became inseparable.
I left cellphone company to work for a large online retailer (you know the one...it sells everything from A to Z^(smile)). Online retailer always hires a bunch of people as temps for the holidays. Then, after the first of the year they keep the best ones and let the rest go. It's technically a temporary job, but at the time they were keeping most of the temps every year. I got really lucky and was made a permanent employee before Thanksgiving.
That was when I got Mika hired on.
One cool thing about working for retailer was that we all had our own desks and we were allowed-even encouraged to personalize our workspace. We brought in posters, pictures, mood lighting, plants...some people's desks looked almost like little apartments. I even kept a pair of house slippers and a blanket to cuddle in at my desk.
Mika was a huge Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle fan, and she had a bunch of memorabilia at her desk. Part of that memorabilia was a complete set of vintage figurines that had been given to her as a kid. Her favorite turtle, Raphael, help pride of place on top of her monitor.
Since it was holiday season we were very busy, with calls coming in at a pretty brisk pace. With all the new people it made things pretty hectic. Retailer gave a few seasoned reps a position as a "holiday helper" so they could assist the newbies; leaving the team leads and supervisors to take escalations and do all the supervisor-y things they usually did.
That year they gave each rep two solo cups: one red and one blue. If we had a question or needed basic help, then we put the blue cup on top of our computer and a helper would come. If it was an escalation or we needed a password for a credi
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Just saw two women blatantly doing this while I was out walking the dogs. We were passing on a narrow lane and it wasn't possible to do this while we all kept a safe distance. Eventually, they had to reluctantly move closer together.
I've been married for 5 years, during which time most things I voice concern about are dismissed by my wife. I am often scoffed at or asked "why I have to bring this up again". Because of this dynamic I spend a lot of time self-analyzing and wondering if I'm out of line or if my concerns are valid or if I have the right to feel the way that I feel, and I've recently run into another one of these situations, so please help me out.
My wife is white, and I'm middle eastern. My wife's best friend (of 15 years) has been with her boyfriend for about a year. Soon after they got together, I learned that the boyfriend had been in and out of rehab for alcohol and pill abuse, but more importantly that he had been arrested for a hate-crime style attack on a middle eastern guy. During the beginning of an Uber ride home from the bar, the boyfriend realized his driver was middle eastern and physically attacked him, punching him in the face multiple time and telling him to "go back to his country".
This was obviously concerning since I am middle eastern, and was assuming I'd have to be around this guy at some point. I expressed my concerns to my wife, but she dismissed it and told me to "get over it" since it was her best friend's boyfriend and he was "going to be around". I stood my ground, but my wife wasn't having it, and told me I had to deal with it.
Since then, I've had to have this guy in my home around my mixed middle-eastern children multiple times, I've had to entertain him, and be cordial with him despite his behavior. On Halloween the guy even dressed up as Charles Manson, complete with a swastika on his forehead. When I told my wife that this latest stunt was the last straw and I didn't want the guy around me or our kids anymore, she told me "too bad, he's coming over for Michelle's birthday party" (Michelle is a friend of ours).
I brought my concerns up again today and my wife was visibly angry and ended the conversation early. What am I supposed to do about this? How do I handle this aside from being the "stereotypical angry husband with a bad temper" that my wife paints me to be when I finally lose my cool in these situations?
