[Magnusson] Venezia sign striker Óttar Magnús Karlsson from Víkingur Reykjavík. Becomes second Icelandic player to join the Serie B side twitter.com/totalfl/statu…
👍︎ 53
💬︎
👤︎ u/dayumgurl1
📅︎ Sep 25 2020
🚨︎ report
TIL that not all Norse soldiers who die in battle go to Odin’s hall, Valhalla. Half go to Freyja’s field, Fólkvangr, which has a different hall: Sessrúmnir. Freyja rides a chariot pulled by two cats and occasionally rides her boar, Hildisvíni (who is actually her protégé Óttar, disguised). en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Fre…
👍︎ 1k
💬︎
📅︎ Aug 26 2018
🚨︎ report
(Kolbeinn) Óttar(sson) Proppé vill viðræður við Sjálfstæðisflokkinn ruv.is/frett/kolbeinn-vil…
👍︎ 5
💬︎
👤︎ u/busmoswag
📅︎ Nov 13 2017
🚨︎ report
19yo Óttar Magnús Karlsson has scored a perfect hattrick in the Icelandic Premier Division.

This boy, born in 1997 spent 3 years in the Ajax youth system before returning to the homeland this summer. Tonight he made his mark by scoring a perfect hattrick (left foot, right foot and a header) in a top flight game.

Now, this guy is a buddy of mine so I might be a lot more stoked than you all are but currently the lad is considered Iceland's top talent.

I'll upload a video of his goals in an edit in a couple of minutes.

Edit: The game isn't yet up on the highlight show so just use the time to make some popcorn or something ya know!

Edit 2: OP Delivers!

👍︎ 81
💬︎
📅︎ Aug 08 2016
🚨︎ report
President Bongo & Óttar S. - 1° Quadrante soundcloud.com/orbmag/pre…
👍︎ 3
💬︎
📅︎ Jan 28 2019
🚨︎ report
this is óttar proppe he is an icelandic parlament member and is going to take part in the eurovision song contest this year
👍︎ 19
💬︎
📅︎ Feb 15 2014
🚨︎ report
SERIOUS: This subreddit needs to understand what a "dad joke" really means.

I don't want to step on anybody's toes here, but the amount of non-dad jokes here in this subreddit really annoys me. First of all, dad jokes CAN be NSFW, it clearly says so in the sub rules. Secondly, it doesn't automatically make it a dad joke if it's from a conversation between you and your child. Most importantly, the jokes that your CHILDREN tell YOU are not dad jokes. The point of a dad joke is that it's so cheesy only a dad who's trying to be funny would make such a joke. That's it. They are stupid plays on words, lame puns and so on. There has to be a clever pun or wordplay for it to be considered a dad joke.

Again, to all the fellow dads, I apologise if I'm sounding too harsh. But I just needed to get it off my chest.

👍︎ 17k
💬︎
📅︎ Jan 15 2022
🚨︎ report
A priest, a pastor, and a rabbit walk into a blood donation clinic.

The nurse asked the rabbit, “what is your blood type?”

“I am probably a type O” said the rabbit.

👍︎ 11k
💬︎
👤︎ u/snc8698
📅︎ Jan 29 2022
🚨︎ report
I’ve got this disease where I can’t stop making airport puns.

The doctor says it terminal.

👍︎ 8k
💬︎
👤︎ u/xIR0NPULSE
📅︎ Jan 28 2022
🚨︎ report
Just because it's a joke, doesn't mean it's a dad joke

Alot of great jokes get posted here! However just because you have a joke, doesn't mean it's a dad joke.

THIS IS NOT ABOUT NSFW, THIS IS ABOUT LONG JOKES, BLONDE JOKES, SEXUAL JOKES, KNOCK KNOCK JOKES, POLITICAL JOKES, ETC BEING POSTED IN A DAD JOKE SUB

Try telling these sexual jokes that get posted here, to your kid and see how your spouse likes it.. if that goes well, Try telling one of your friends kid about your sex life being like Coca cola, first it was normal, than light and now zero , and see if the parents are OK with you telling their kid the "dad joke"

I'm not even referencing the NSFW, I'm saying Dad jokes are corny, and sometimes painful, not sexual

So check out r/jokes for all types of jokes

r/unclejokes for dirty jokes

r/3amjokes for real weird and alot of OC

r/cleandadjokes If your really sick of seeing not dad jokes in r/dadjokes

Punchline !

Edit: this is not a post about NSFW , This is about jokes, knock knock jokes, blonde jokes, political jokes etc being posted in a dad joke sub

Edit 2: don't touch the thermostat

👍︎ 6k
💬︎
📅︎ Jan 23 2022
🚨︎ report
Blind Girl Here. Give Me Your Best Blind Jokes!

Do your worst!

👍︎ 5k
💬︎
📅︎ Jan 02 2022
🚨︎ report
I heard that by law you have to turn on your headlights when it’s raining in Sweden.

How the hell am I suppose to know when it’s raining in Sweden?

👍︎ 10k
💬︎
📅︎ Jan 25 2022
🚨︎ report
Puns make me numb

Mathematical puns makes me number

👍︎ 9k
💬︎
👤︎ u/tadashi4
📅︎ Jan 26 2022
🚨︎ report
So my mom is getting her foot cut off today.. (really)

We told her she can lean on us for support. Although, we are going to have to change her driver's license, her height is going down by a foot. I don't want to go too far out on a limb here but it better not be a hack job.

👍︎ 4k
💬︎
👤︎ u/Slimybirch
📅︎ Jan 27 2022
🚨︎ report
Petition to ban rants from this sub

Ants don’t even have the concept fathers, let alone a good dad joke. Keep r/ants out of my r/dadjokes.

But no, seriously. I understand rule 7 is great to have intelligent discussion, but sometimes it feels like 1 in 10 posts here is someone getting upset about the jokes on this sub. Let the mods deal with it, they regulate the sub.

👍︎ 8k
💬︎
👤︎ u/drak0ni
📅︎ Jan 24 2022
🚨︎ report
French fries weren’t cooked in France.

They were cooked in Greece.

👍︎ 9k
💬︎
📅︎ Jan 20 2022
🚨︎ report
This subreddit is 10 years old now.

I'm surprised it hasn't decade.

👍︎ 14k
💬︎
📅︎ Jan 14 2022
🚨︎ report
.
👍︎ 5k
💬︎
📅︎ Jan 29 2022
🚨︎ report
Why does Spider-Man's calendar only have 11 months?

He lost May

👍︎ 8k
💬︎
📅︎ Jan 26 2022
🚨︎ report
When I was a single man, I had loads of free time.

Now that I listen to albums, I hardly ever leave the house.

👍︎ 7k
💬︎
📅︎ Jan 25 2022
🚨︎ report
You've been hit by
👍︎ 6k
💬︎
👤︎ u/mordrathe
📅︎ Jan 20 2022
🚨︎ report
I'm sick of you guys posting dumb wordplay in here for awards and upvotes.

Don't you know a good pun is its own reword?

👍︎ 11k
💬︎
📅︎ Jan 21 2022
🚨︎ report
My 4 year oldest favourit joke, which he very proudly memorized and told all his teachers.

Two muffins are in an oven, one muffin looks at the other and says "is it just me, or is it hot in here?"

Then the other muffin says "AHH, TALKING MUFFIN!!!"

👍︎ 9k
💬︎
📅︎ Jan 22 2022
🚨︎ report
Girlfriend got me good. Never been more proud of her.

Said if she ever hosts a gender reveal party, when it comes time to pop the balloon she'll spray everyone with water.

Gender is fluid.

👍︎ 10k
💬︎
👤︎ u/Mannheimd
📅︎ Jan 29 2022
🚨︎ report
Dropped my best ever dad joke & no one was around to hear it

For context I'm a Refuse Driver (Garbage man) & today I was on food waste. After I'd tipped I was checking the wagon for any defects when I spotted a lone pea balanced on the lifts.

I said "hey look, an escaPEA"

No one near me but it didn't half make me laugh for a good hour or so!

Edit: I can't believe how much this has blown up. Thank you everyone I've had a blast reading through the replies 😂

👍︎ 20k
💬︎
📅︎ Jan 11 2022
🚨︎ report
What starts with a W and ends with a T

It really does, I swear!

👍︎ 6k
💬︎
📅︎ Jan 13 2022
🚨︎ report
My wife left me because I couldn’t stop doing impressions of pasta

And now I’m cannelloni

👍︎ 6k
💬︎
📅︎ Jan 23 2022
🚨︎ report
Why did Karen press Ctrl+Shift+Delete?

Because she wanted to see the task manager.

👍︎ 11k
💬︎
👤︎ u/Eoussama
📅︎ Jan 17 2022
🚨︎ report
Steve JOBS would have made a better President than Donald Trump

But that’s comparing apples to oranges

👍︎ 8k
💬︎
📅︎ Jan 22 2022
🚨︎ report
I just flew in from Chernobyl

And boy are my arms legs.

👍︎ 7k
💬︎
👤︎ u/JhopkinsWA
📅︎ Jan 23 2022
🚨︎ report
My 7 year old daughter just told me this one. I'm so proud. What did the duck say when he bought chapstick?

Put it on my bill

👍︎ 6k
💬︎
📅︎ Jan 26 2022
🚨︎ report
What do you call a woman who’s really good at darts?

Amy

👍︎ 5k
💬︎
📅︎ Jan 29 2022
🚨︎ report
So 2 trees got arrested in the town I live...

Heard they've been doing some shady business.

👍︎ 7k
💬︎
📅︎ Jan 18 2022
🚨︎ report
No gains
👍︎ 8k
💬︎
👤︎ u/ridi86
📅︎ Jan 22 2022
🚨︎ report
I was almost upset that my coffee tasted like dirt today

but then I remembered it was ground this morning.

Edit: Thank you guys for the awards, they're much nicer than the cardboard sleeve I've been using and reassures me that my jokes aren't stale

Edit 2: I have already been made aware that Men In Black 3 has told a version of this joke before. If the joke is not new to you, please enjoy any of the single origin puns in the comments

👍︎ 8k
💬︎
📅︎ Jan 19 2022
🚨︎ report
How eggs-traordinary
👍︎ 5k
💬︎
👤︎ u/Rix27_
📅︎ Jan 21 2022
🚨︎ report
Duckduckgo
👍︎ 6k
💬︎
📅︎ Jan 28 2022
🚨︎ report
Geometry sucks
👍︎ 3k
💬︎
👤︎ u/Kash30
📅︎ Jan 25 2022
🚨︎ report
What is a a bisexual person doing when they’re not dating anybody?

They’re on standbi

👍︎ 11k
💬︎
📅︎ Jan 12 2022
🚨︎ report
What is the scariest tree?

BamBOO!

👍︎ 6k
💬︎
📅︎ Jan 18 2022
🚨︎ report
My ten-year-old daughter came up with this at dinner tonight: What do you get if put a copy of Macbeth on top of a dictionary?

A play on words.

👍︎ 6k
💬︎
👤︎ u/ah1887
📅︎ Jan 20 2022
🚨︎ report
A queen size statement.
👍︎ 4k
💬︎
📅︎ Jan 22 2022
🚨︎ report
Did you know all dogs are made up of only 3 elements?

Calcium, nickel, neon

👍︎ 3k
💬︎
👤︎ u/redneckvet
📅︎ Jan 25 2022
🚨︎ report
Orion's belt
👍︎ 7k
💬︎
👤︎ u/mordrathe
📅︎ Jan 25 2022
🚨︎ report
Geddit? No? Only me?
👍︎ 6k
💬︎
👤︎ u/shampy311
📅︎ Dec 28 2021
🚨︎ report
My son, Luke, loves how I named our kids after Star Wars characters...

My daughter, Chewbecca, not so much.

👍︎ 9k
💬︎
📅︎ Jan 21 2022
🚨︎ report
I wanna hear your best airplane puns.

Pilot on me!!

👍︎ 3k
💬︎
📅︎ Jan 07 2022
🚨︎ report
E or ß?
👍︎ 9k
💬︎
👤︎ u/Amazekam
📅︎ Jan 03 2022
🚨︎ report
My fencing opponent laughed at me for bringing a block of cheddar to a sword fight.

Until he discovered it was extra sharp.

👍︎ 4k
💬︎
👤︎ u/JoeFas
📅︎ Jan 28 2022
🚨︎ report

Please note that this site uses cookies to personalise content and adverts, to provide social media features, and to analyse web traffic. Click here for more information.