Wtem Puns

Scott just announced on twitter that he is out on WTEM after 27 years. Wonder what that means for Czabe

...or his he still on vacation? He wasn’t on the afternoon show and I didn’t hear Czabe mention him being out. Also didn’t do his podcast with Solly today.

u/toja123000 Twój post przypomniał mi jedną z najbardziej popierdolonych akcji w PKP.

Trasa Warszawa Kraków, pospieszny, cała trasa 3h zero postojów. Grudzień.

Ludzi jak w puszce sardynek, więc stoję w przejściu między wagonami z drzwiami takimi rozsuwanymi, ale wygodnie sobie siedzę na walizce. Szwenda się jakiś gościu, młody i wyjątkowo wesoły, ale nieszkodliwy. Rozmawia z ludźmi i opowiada jakieś głupoty. Wtem zmiana nastawienia, inny pasażer czyta książkę i tamten "wiesz ile ja książek przeczytałem? Więcej niż Ty, śmieciu" i nabzdyczony idzie. Wraca i fuczy, wierci się i śmierdzi kapustą. Jak dziecko z przedszkola dyżurnego! Wtem!

RZUCA SIĘ NA DRZWI I JE OTWIERA! PĘDZĄCY WAGON, LUDZIE GO ŁAPIĄ I KTOŚ KRZYCZY "EJ NIE SKACZ!" A On NA TO

"NIE CHCE SKAKAĆ TYLKO SIĘ WYSIKAC, BOSZEEEE!" XD

I LUDZIE TRZYMALI GO ZA PLECAK A ON WYWALIŁ KUTASA ZA DRZWI I SZCZA xD ŚMIEJE SIĘ I WIWATUJE XD do dziś wyobrazam sobie jakiegoś mieszkańca obok torów który widzi to kuriozum xD

No ale dobra typ się wysikał i jak kot po wypróżnieniu, energia, szaleństwo i jeb flaszka z kieszeni i dawaj z rury! Ktoś poszedł/ przecisnął się przez ludzi do konduktora. Wrócił z nim, konduktor się go pyta skąd jedzie dokąd jedzie itd. a ten gościu, napruty fest, nawet nie widzi, że to konduktor i do niego "a Ty gdzie jedziesz? Chcesz się napiś?" a konduktor, dobry aktor "pewnie, a masz więcej?" i poszli do przedziału gościa.

I teraz plot twist-wysiadamy w Krakowie, stoi policja, gość wysiada i na widok mundurowych "CZEŚ PANOWIEEEEE!" CI GO W KAJDANKI I WYCIĄGAJĄ MU ZZA PAZUCHY, 30CM NÓŻ. TAKŻE TEGO :) A do dzisiaj w rodzinie jest hasełko jak ktoś idzie do WC "Ej nie skacz" i odzew "nie chce skakać tylko się wysikać BOSZEEEE!"

Philadelphia 76ers (16-16) @ Washington Wizards (17-15)

• Game Time: December 26, 2021 @ 06:00 PM EST
• Venue: Capital One Arena - Washington, DC
• TV: Philadelphia: NBCSP, Washington: NBCSWA
• Radio: Philadelphia: WPEN, Washington: WTEM
• NBA Game Summary / Charts

Matchup History

Season Stats

Team Leaders

Eastern Conference Standings

I don't want to step on anybody's toes here, but the amount of non-dad jokes here in this subreddit really annoys me. First of all, dad jokes CAN be NSFW, it clearly says so in the sub rules. Secondly, it doesn't automatically make it a dad joke if it's from a conversation between you and your child. Most importantly, the jokes that your CHILDREN tell YOU are not dad jokes. The point of a dad joke is that it's so cheesy only a dad who's trying to be funny would make such a joke. That's it. They are stupid plays on words, lame puns and so on. There has to be a clever pun or wordplay for it to be considered a dad joke.

Again, to all the fellow dads, I apologise if I'm sounding too harsh. But I just needed to get it off my chest.

Do your worst!

I'm surprised it hasn't decade.

For context I'm a Refuse Driver (Garbage man) & today I was on food waste. After I'd tipped I was checking the wagon for any defects when I spotted a lone pea balanced on the lifts.

I said "hey look, an escaPEA"

No one near me but it didn't half make me laugh for a good hour or so!

Edit: I can't believe how much this has blown up. Thank you everyone I've had a blast reading through the replies 😂

It really does, I swear!

I am super excited to share that my new mod Skyrim Multiple Player Characters (SMPC) has launched today and is available for download on the Skyrim Nexus. SMPC will redefine how you play Skyrim. Save characters, switch characters, spawn characters as followers, and start new characters all within the same game world, on the same save game file. More information as well as walkthrough videos can be found at the link above.

NEW VIDEO WALKTHROUGH: Proteus Player & NPC Module Guide - YouTube

Here's a brief overview of the mod's features:

To use SMPC, you must press certain hotkeys:

• Player Module: Default Hotkey "Home".
• NPC Module: Default Hotkey "End". (must be aiming at NPC)

Both hotkeys are configurable in the MCM.

Player Module

• Save your player characters and create backups that can be loaded whenever in any save or game world
• Swap between player characters in the same game world - create and play as multiple characters
• Summon player characters as permanent followers
• Quickly change the appearance preset being applied to your player character.
• Easily create a new character within the same game world
• View and edit the skills, attributes, and stats of the player
• Toggle player factions (e.g., bandit, forsworn, dremora, thalmor, etc.)
• Make the player perform any of 20+ idle animations
• Cheat function to add weapons, armors, spells to Player

NPC Module

• Instantly control any NPC
• Customize the appearance of NPCs using a combination of cosmetic menus and presets
• View and edit the skills, attributes, and stats of any NPC
• Teach spells to NPCs or make them forget spells they already know
• Make NPCs recruitable and/or marriable
• Change the combat style of any NPC
• Change the voice types of NPCs. (especially useful for the playercharacter followers)
• Edit the equipped outfit of any NPC
• View and edit an NPC’s equipped items (make the changes temporary or permanent)
• View and edit an NPC’s equipped spells (make the changes temporary or permanent)
• Make NPCs perform any of 20+ idle animations
• Change any NPC to be essential, protected, or killable
• Modify an NPC’s AI behavior. (ex:assistance, confidence, aggression)
• Resurrect dead NPCs or remove their bodies
• Change the level of an NPC
• Duplicate NPCs

Let me know if you have any questions! I would be happy to answer them here or on th

Buenosdillas

They’re on standbi

Pilot on me!!

Dad jokes are supposed to be jokes you can tell a kid and they will understand it and find it funny.

This sub is mostly just NSFW puns now.

If it needs a NSFW tag it's not a dad joke. There should just be a NSFW puns subreddit for that.

Edit* I'm not replying any longer and turning off notifications but to all those that say "no one cares", there sure are a lot of you arguing about it. Maybe I'm wrong but you people don't need to be rude about it. If you really don't care, don't comment.

When I got home, they were still there.

What did 0 say to 8 ?

" Nice Belt "

So What did 3 say to 8 ?

" Hey, you two stop making out "

I won't be doing that today!

[Removed]

You take away their little brooms

This morning, my 4 year old daughter.

Daughter: I'm hungry

Me: nerves building, smile widening

Me: Hi hungry, I'm dad.

She had no idea what was going on but I finally did it.

Thank you all for listening.

There hasn't been a post all year!

Why

It’s pronounced “Noel.”

After all his first name is No-vac

What, then, is Chinese rap?

Edit:

Notable mentions from the comments:

• Spanish/Swedish/Swiss/Serbian hits

• French/Finnish art

• Country/Canadian rap

• Chinese/Country/Canadian rock

• Turkish/Tunisian/Taiwanese rap

There hasn't been a single post this year!

(Happy 2022 from New Zealand)