My wife has just given me a book with all the words that I'm not supposed to use when we argue....
It's called a dictionary.
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︎ Oct 29 2022
"I'm trying to think of words that start and end with the same letter," my son told me.
"How about that," I replied.
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︎ Oct 14 2022
When letters have words with each other
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︎ Aug 24 2022
He certainly has a way with words!
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︎ Feb 04 2022
Accordian to a recent survey, replacing words with the names of musical instruments often goes undetectedβ¦
π︎ 7k
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︎ Sep 16 2021
Accordion to research, 9 out of 10 people don't notice when you replace words with random musical instruments.
Please donβt become angry and resort to violins if you didn't notice.
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︎ Dec 26 2021
Some people are good with words
And some not are that gooder
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︎ Jul 07 2022
Thereβs something wrong about words ending with βoffβ, like kickoff or showoffβ¦
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︎ May 29 2022
I dont trust words with more than one u
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︎ Mar 13 2022
A play on words with bind torture kill the serial killer. Iβm getting dumber
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︎ Feb 13 2022
I got mixed up with the words jacuzzi and yakuza the other day...
now I'm in hot water with the Japanese mafia
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︎ Feb 17 2022
Her: Undress me with your words.
Me: Thereβs a spider in your bra.
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︎ Aug 17 2018
What do you call it when a language slowly changes over time to the point where by the end itβs an entirely new language with none of the original words?
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︎ Aug 16 2021
It's amaizing what you can do with words...
You can make very corny puns!
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︎ Jul 24 2021
I've gone and confused the words 'Yakuza' with 'Jacuzzi'
Now I'm in hot water with the Japanese Mafia.
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︎ Jun 10 2020
Wife: "Undress me with your words."
Me: " Ive just seen a huge spider go down your top."
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︎ Oct 28 2020
My dad has a way with words.
I think its time for him to join the Dad's Poet Society.
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︎ Nov 05 2020
A little play with words
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︎ Jul 14 2019
When I'm reading, I hate the silence, but music with words is too distracting., so I always play music without it.
It's instrumental to my comprehension.
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︎ Oct 12 2020
i was told abbreviating words would make me look cool, so i replied with
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︎ Aug 14 2019
My friend said he couldn't play with us because he had to write a "600 words reflection" so I did one for him
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︎ May 08 2020
After the doctor finished up with my prostrate exam the nurse came in and said three words I didnβt want to hear...
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︎ Mar 09 2018
Today, I apologised to my family for replacing some words with their less appropriate synonyms..
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︎ Aug 08 2020
Every time I leave work early to surprise my wife, she always greets me with these three special words.
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︎ Aug 13 2018
my dad surprised me with this clever play on words, took me a minute to get at the time
just got home from the first day of school (i was in debate class at school)--
dad: how was school?
me: it was good, but a few of my friends dropped debate class
dad: dropped debate? what are they, fishermen?
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︎ Aug 27 2013
Request! Help me come up with cheesy pun using words "quetzal" or "monkey"?
I am making cheesy valentine-like cards for my fellow Adventure Monkeys--a name that was dubbed to the group I did humanitarian aid work with in Guatemala. For our last meeting tomorrow, I want to bring cheesy valentine-like cards, but I'm having trouble coming up with a silly pun. I'd like to use the words Quetzal (national bird of Guatemala) or Monkey (for our group) if possible.
Any ideas? I need your brilliant pun minds!
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︎ Jun 25 2015
A man in the street started throwing words beginning with 'th' at me.
I managed to dodge this, there and then but I didn't see that coming!
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︎ Sep 06 2017
Did you hear about the guy that robbed the library for every book they had? When questioned on how he did it he told authorities he basically talked the librarian into letting him. So i guess you could say he got a way with words.
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︎ Sep 10 2019
βI don't like it when people emphasize words or phrases by following them with βquote, unquoteβ.β
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︎ Dec 11 2016
I really need to stop inserting words from foreign languages with my friends.
Saw a girl, at the bar, told my friend "she's a nein." He told me to head to the eye doctor.
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︎ Feb 01 2019
Thanos made it to the front page with 2 words. Prequelmemes made it with 1. StarTrekGifs made it with 0 words. Can we make it with negative?
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︎ Aug 30 2018
Wife is playing words with friends and getting bad letters
Wife: I am always stuck with all these I's.
Son: Now you can see better with more eyes!!
Could not control the chuckles and my wife's groans were sweeter than....topic for another day.
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︎ Feb 16 2017
My dad and I talking about words with friends.
Me: Dad, I know theres a 2 "L" llama but is there a 1 "L" llama?
Dad: No, but there is a 3 "L" llama...
Me: What is a 3 "L" llama?
Dad: When there is a really bad fire, it's called a 3 "L" llama.
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︎ Jan 08 2015
Accordion to research, 9 out of 10 people don't notice when you replace words with random musical instruments.
Please donβt resort to violins and anger if you donβt notice.
π︎ 1k
π
︎ Dec 06 2020
Accordian to a recent survey, replacing words with the names of musical instruments often goes undetected.
π︎ 8k
π
︎ Apr 17 2018
Accordion to a recent survey replacing words with the names of musical instruments in a sentence often goes undetected.
π︎ 20
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︎ Feb 25 2019
Accordion to research, 9 out of 10 people donβt notice it when you replace random words with musical instruments.
π︎ 253
π
︎ Jul 14 2018
Accordian to a recent survey, replacing words with the names of musical instruments often goes undetected.
π︎ 36
π
︎ Jun 02 2019
Accordion to a recent survey, replacing words with the names of musical instruments in a sentence often goes undetected.
π︎ 93
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︎ Apr 12 2015
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