The waves were awfully angry at the beach today

They hit their breaking point

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πŸ‘€︎ u/shtory
πŸ“…︎ Jul 18 2016
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What did the ocean say to the other? Nothing they just waved! SEA what I did there? I'm SHORE you did, BEACH.
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Divine_Squire
πŸ“…︎ Oct 02 2019
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In my twenties, I used to live on a houseboat, and started seeing the girl next door.

Eventually we drifted apart.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ May 24 2019
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514 Dad Jokes

What do you call a fake noodle? An Impasta.

I would avoid the sushi if I was you. It’s a little fishy.

Want to hear a joke about paper? Nevermind it’s tearable.

Why did the cookie cry? Because his father was a wafer so long!

I used to work in a shoe recycling shop. It was sole destroying.

What do you call a belt with a watch on it? A waist of time.

How do you organize an outer space party? You planet.

I went to a seafood disco last week... and pulled a mussel.

Do you know where you can get chicken broth in bulk? The stock market.

I cut my finger chopping cheese, but I think that I may have greater problems.

My cat was just sick on the carpet, I don’t think it’s feline well.

Why did the octopus beat the shark in a fight? Because it was well armed.

How much does a hipster weigh? An instagram.

What did daddy spider say to baby spider? You spend too much time on the web.

Atheism is a non-prophet organisation.

There’s a new type of broom out, it’s sweeping the nation.

What cheese can never be yours? Nacho cheese.

What did the Buffalo say to his little boy when he dropped him off at school? Bison.

Have you ever heard of a music group called Cellophane? They mostly wrap.

Why does Superman gets invited to dinners? Because he is a Supperhero.

How was Rome split in two? With a pair of Ceasars.

The shovel was a ground breaking invention.

A scarecrow says, "This job isn't for everyone, but hay, it's in my jeans."

A Buddhist walks up to a hot dog stand and says, "Make me one with everything."

Did you hear about the guy who lost the left side of his body? He's alright now.

What do you call a girl with one leg that's shorter than the other? Ilene.

I did a theatrical performance on puns. It was a play on words.

What do you do with a dead chemist? You barium.

I bet the person who created the door knocker won a Nobel prize.

Towels can’t tell jokes. They have a dry sense of humor.

Two birds are sitting on a perch and one says "Do you smell fish?"

Do you know sign language? You should learn it, it’s pretty handy.

What do you call a beautiful pumpkin? GOURDgeous.

Why did one banana spy on the other? Because she was appealing.

What do you call a cow with no legs? Ground beef.

What do you call a cow with two legs? Lean beef.

What do you call a cow with all of its legs? High steaks.

A cross eyed teacher couldn’t control his pupils.

After the accident, the juggler didn

... keep reading on reddit ➑

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Josvys
πŸ“…︎ Oct 03 2019
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Just had dinner with cousins

We were talking about the beach and, for around 10 minutes, every time someone said waves both my uncles and my dad would all do the wave...

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πŸ‘€︎ u/dickrichards2
πŸ“…︎ Sep 23 2014
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What did the two oceans say to eachother?

Nothing. They just waved. Did you sea what I did there? I’m shore you did. Oh c’mon! Don’t be a beach! Clam down I didn’t say the actual thing

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πŸ‘€︎ u/The-bee-movie
πŸ“…︎ Jun 06 2019
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What did the two oceans say to each other?

Nothing they just waved.

Did you sea what I did there?

I’m shore you did.

Oh, c’mon! Don’t be a beach

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πŸ‘€︎ u/The-bee-movie
πŸ“…︎ Jun 01 2018
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My significant other was not a fan,

Me: what did the Ocean say to the other Ocean?

Her: What?

Me: Nothing they just waved... Sea what I did there?

Her: groans* I hate you (jokingly)

Me: Why are you so salty about it? don't be such a beach.

EDIT: she actually laughed pretty hard after that.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/lowdownporto
πŸ“…︎ Apr 29 2014
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