The Treatment Puns

A list of puns related to "The Treatment"

My therapist said the best treatment for depression is to vigorously rub salt into my skin, to draw out excess moisture....

WOW....I'm cured.

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👤︎ u/VERBERD
📅︎ Nov 28 2020
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My doctor was trying to describe the treatment plan for my frostbite.

I couldn't picture it, so she showed me a faux toe.

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👤︎ u/Cobclob
📅︎ Jan 09 2021
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Why did they pull a lawsuit against the spa for their wax treatment?

It was a ripoff.

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👤︎ u/kgangadhar
📅︎ Dec 19 2020
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If you get hit in the face, the home treatment is to hold a raw steak against it to reduce swelling...

...it does more than meats the eye.

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👤︎ u/KW-DadJoker
📅︎ Oct 29 2020
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Why did Vice Squad raid the water treatment plant?

They'd received a tip about a bunch of Pumps and Hoses.

(I'm sorry. I just got off work, heard "pumps and hoses" on the radio, and a bad idea was born.)

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👤︎ u/OOOH_WHATS_THIS
📅︎ Sep 11 2020
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I know people put mud on their faces for various benefits but I saw a sign the other day that said sewage treatment works

But trust me, it doesn’t

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👤︎ u/Nymphomanius
📅︎ Sep 09 2020
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Did you hear about the sentry for the waste water treatment plant?

He has guard doody!

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👤︎ u/thomasbrakeline
📅︎ Jul 28 2020
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A total dad joke I made up last night- What do you call an avocado that's giving you the silent treatment?

An Incommunicado

Eh?!

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👤︎ u/Mdooles11
📅︎ Apr 26 2020
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TIL: A recent study found that the newest strain of head lice is resistant to conventional treatment.

That left scientists scratching their heads.

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👤︎ u/porichoygupto
📅︎ Mar 14 2019
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Out of all the professionals I’ve been to for treatment, I’ve found chiropractors to be the funniest

They just never fail to crack me up

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👤︎ u/Heskeyberg
📅︎ Sep 10 2019
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What do you call a group of doctors that specialize in the skin treatment of elephants?

A pack-o-derms

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👤︎ u/spunkards97
📅︎ Sep 03 2019
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Out of the blue, I decided to take my wife to a commercial establishment offering health and beauty treatment through such means as steam baths, exercise equipment, and massage

You could say the decision was pretty spa-radic

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👤︎ u/Avasnay
📅︎ Apr 12 2019
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My dad, type 2 diabetic, after 11 months of suffering chemo/radiation treatment for pancreatic cancer, 5 months after he was told the surgery failed and it was terminal. Brother reads off the back of a Sweet'N Low packet "...been determined to cause cancer to laboratory animals" Dad snaps back

"Bullshit! I've been using that stuff for years and...(looks at 13" scar across his stomach from whipple procedure to remove tumors, looks back at family for effect) oh... shit..."

Never lost his great attitude towards life, family, and people in general. Always quick with a joke/dad joke until the end.

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👤︎ u/Dude0311
📅︎ Jul 20 2017
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My buddy lost his job at the sewage treatment plant

He said the hours were really crappy

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👤︎ u/hbsquatch
📅︎ Dec 17 2015
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I was let go from my job at the sewage treatment plant today.

Deservedly so, I don't know shit.

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👤︎ u/Synisive
📅︎ Jan 29 2016
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Somewhere in my head I apologize to the people at the water treatment plant every time I flush...

I mean that's a... crappy job.

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👤︎ u/Gamerchris360
📅︎ Feb 02 2017
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"Chipotle is going to stop serving some of its pork because of the bad treatment of pigs? Doesn't matter. Those pigs are bread to die"

Those pigs aren't bread, they're pork.

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👤︎ u/SeismicAltop
📅︎ Jan 28 2015
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What's the difference between treatment of Avian Flu and treatment of Swine Flu?

Birds get tweetment and pigs get oinkment.

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👤︎ u/girthanthiclopse
📅︎ Apr 22 2014
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