A list of puns related to "The Sketches"
He drew praise for his artwork.
βItβs not rare, and it wasnβt well doneβ
~ Statler & Waldrof (Old Muppetβs)
It was an accent piece.
That was awesome
But for one of them, I drew a Blanc.
Dont worry, you'll see them in a bit.
The painter was mad at the sketch artist because he was behaving "Sketchy" and he crossed the "Line".
heuueueueue.
Apparently heβs a con artist.
I'm a con artist!
https://preview.redd.it/wa3s3ozxftc61.png?width=4500&format=png&auto=webp&s=04f10d36e95914e4d39ec2312ce5176a062911b1
Who thinks they're punny?! πβ β I sketched this Hellraiser holding a cactus and thought it'd make a cute Valentine's Day card. I'm in the process of colouring it and I want YOU to help me caption it.β
I've asked the question on IG (@ashrobertsondesign) but didn't get a lot of feedback so I'm reaching out here. Gimme your best prick, point, hell, etc. related puns n make it about love π₯
I'll choose a favourite from the comments and turn it into a FREE Valentine's Day card printable.
She didn't really seem to appreciate the sketch but it went on the fridge anyway...
Edit: I thunk up a better punchline.
When my Mum and her sisters were younger, in an attempt to keep them quiet for half an hour, he told them to sit down next to each other so he could do their portrait. Every now and again he would stop, look up and to ensure he had the correct scale, held out his thumb and squinted a little, then continued.
After half an hour they got restless and said "Are you done yet, let's see".
He turned the drawing pad around to show...a simple sketch of a thumb.
Not a Dad yet, but thankful to have this trick up my sleeve for when I am.
One day his assistant saw the mad scientist on top of the fly, sketching out some new ideas
Assistant: what on earth are you doing?
mad scientist looks up from his work.
Mad scientist: I like creating stuff on the fly.
If Bud Abbott and Lou Costello were alive today, their infamous sketch, "Whoβs on first?" might have turned out something like this:
Bud Abbott: Super Duper computer store. Can I help you?
Lou Costello: Thanks. Iβm setting up an office in my den and Iβm thinking about buying a computer.
Bud Abbott: Mac?
Lou Costello: No, the nameβs Lou.
Bud Abbott: Your computer?
Lou Costello: I donβt own a computer. I want to buy one.
Bud Abbott: Mac?
Lou Costello: I told you, my nameβs Lou.
Bud Abbott: What about Windows?
Lou Costello: Why? Will it get stuffy in here?
Bud Abbott: Do you want a computer with Windows?
Lou Costello: I donβt know. What will I see when I look at the windows?
Bud Abbott: Wallpaper.
http://bestcleanfunnyjokes.com/abbott-and-costello-meet-microsoft-windows/
What's the difference between mononucleosis and herpes? You get mono from snatching kisses.
If you were to lose your left arm, you'd be all right.
Why can't you hear a pteradactyl going to the bathroom? Because the P is silent.
Communists only write in lower-case letters because they hate capitalism.
I got a new job at the police sketching pictures of suspects. I'm a con artist.
Cat Woman's real name is Catherine Woman.
I have a new cat joke. ...Just kitt'en.
How do you find Will Smith in the snow? Look for Fresh Prints. *
Did you hear about the two men who stole a calendar? They got six months each.
I just saw an Apple store get robbed. Does that make me an iWitness?
Dwarfs and midgets have very little in common.
I'm moving to Seoul. I was told it would be a good Korea move.
Did you hear about the professor who was killed in a car accident? He was grading papers on a curve.
Why isn't an iPhone charger called Apple Juice?
Ever try to eat a clock? It's very time consuming.
When Peter Pan throws punches, they Never Land.
I was struggling to understand how lightning works, but then it struck me.
Einstein developed a theory about space. And it was about time, too.
Apparently Neil Armstrong used to tell unfunny jokes about the moon, and then follow up with, "Ah, I guess you had to be there."
I'm going to make a TV series about a plane hijacking. We just shot the pilot.
Would you call a drunk working at an upholstery a recovering alcoholic?
Yesterday I got covered in ketchup from my head tomatoes.
Even though I've gone bald, I still keep the same comb I've had for 20 years. I just can't part with it.
Picture of my sister after getting her nose pierced "She nose something!"
I went to the dentist and showed him my cavity. He told me to pull up my pants and get the hell out.
Did you hear about the kidnapping at school? It was okay - he woke up.
So what if I can't spell armageddon. It's not the end of the world.
When you get an infection, urine trouble.
"Hey waiter! This coffee tastes like mud!" "Yes, sir; it's fresh ground."
How did the butcher introduce his wife? "Meat Patty."
Elton John is a great piano player, but he sucks on the organ.
Elton John wrote a tribute to Amy Winehouse: Candle Under the Spoon *
What's the difference between Amy Winehouse and Captain Morgan? Captain Morgan comes alive when you add coke. *
*My absolut
... keep reading on reddit β‘When he was done he showed me the sketch and I gotta say, heβs a pretty damn-good artist.
I'm paraphrasing here.
Nick: "Amy, thanks for being so chill with these sketches we've been doing."
Amy: "Oh yea, you didn't know this about me, but I was voted 3rd runner up for most-chill in high school".
Nick: "Oh? Why didn't you win?"
Amy: "Eh. The other guys didn't want it more".
My dad was taking my girlfriend home and I was coming with, in the car we were talking about Little Britain and we were talking about the old lady that pees everywhere.
Me: You know they got in a lot of trouble because of those sketches.
Gf: Really?
Me: Yeah, from the Continence Society.
pause
Me: They could barely contain themselves...I'm so sorry, that was in bad taste.
Gf: You're going to Hell.
Dad: You're taking the piss.
I am genuinely sorry if my joke did offend anyone, I just wanted to share my dad's quick comeback because it had all of us laughing.
Last month, I bought a book of skits from a store. I was reading a few of the skits out loud, and my mom mentioned Who's On First. My brother didn't believe it was 70 years old. Mom then said that there was a section of a Greek comedy that was very similar to Monty Python's Parrot Sketch, only with a dead slave instead of a dead parrot.
Me: "Monty Python resurrected that joke far more effectively than that guy wishes he could've resurrected the parrot."
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