What did the river sue for?
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︎ Jan 10 2021
Did you hear about the mummy that just woke up and is still convinced heβs ruler of Egypt? When told βthatβs impossibleβ he flew into a rage, ran away, and jumped in a river.
People say heβs in da Nile
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︎ Dec 25 2020
My friend said that its impossible for a river to move through the desert.
I told him he was in deNile.
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︎ Dec 25 2020
Did you know the Mississippi River is a girl?
If it was a guy it would be the misterssippi River.
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︎ Aug 30 2020
When I was in high school in Belleville, ON, a young local artist spray-painted a beautiful picture on a large concrete wall under a bridge by the Moira river. He didn't get permission to do this, however, and the city eventually painted over it.
Watching his picture go like that must've been pretty demuralizing.
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︎ Nov 19 2020
A man jumped into the freezing river in Paris...
Eyewitness say, the man was in-Seine.
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︎ Dec 04 2020
Whats the fastest thing on the river bed?
A motor-pike and side-carp.
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︎ Oct 08 2020
I thought I was swimming in the river Thames, but apparently I made it all the way to France before I realized...
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︎ Oct 02 2020
Thereβs a more fluid name for the Schuykill River in Philly
Creek Mill - Streams and Nightmares
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︎ Nov 11 2020
Why did the chicken cross the river
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︎ Oct 18 2020
Why panning the river in my brain, this lil' gold nugget came to me.
What do you call a Dinosaur that knows everything?
A herd-it-before!
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︎ Sep 22 2020
What did Bones say to Captain Kirk at the river crossing?
Dam it, Jim
(Be gentle itβs my cake day)
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︎ Jul 25 2020
If you willingly jump in the river in Paris,
you must be in-Seine!
(Just thought of this the other day and forgot to post it before. Hope it hasnβt been done before.)
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︎ Sep 17 2020
Our local cult just started praying for a reservoir to be created on the river running through their compound
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︎ Oct 03 2020
Took the family on a whitewater rafting trip, and first time we came to a sudden descent in the river, we lost everything...
That was just one of the downfalls!
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︎ Aug 11 2020
I work with a small town search and rescue. We recently had a guy visiting from the big city to do some kayaking on the river.
He doesn't know the area and gets himself lost. All he does know is that there are a lot of grizzly bears roaming around during the salmon spawn this time of year, so he's quite afraid to get out of his kayak.
The temperature starts to drop. He needs to stay warm, and decides to build a fire inside his little boat on the river.
He learnt a valuable lesson that night: you can't have your kayak and heat it too.
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︎ Aug 17 2020
What did the priest say at the flooding river?
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︎ Jul 11 2020
The reason lakes are bigger than rivers is because one has running water whereas the other water is merely standing.
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︎ Jun 23 2020
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︎ Jul 21 2020
The town Iβm from just completed dredging a new river thatβs going to make travel a lot easier. Theyβre having a feast to celebrate! Itβs going to be called...
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︎ Jul 14 2020
Iβm debating whether I should cross the river on foot or use my rowboat...
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︎ May 29 2020
Beware of crocs in the river
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︎ Feb 02 2020
Why did the bear go to down to the river?
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︎ May 02 2020
The first time Prince Charles went white water rafting, he threw up on himself when the river grew turbulent...
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︎ Apr 04 2020
How did the religious man cross the raging river?
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︎ Apr 29 2020
TIL: If your boat turns upside down in the river, you can wear it on your head.
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︎ Jul 07 2019
Have you heard of the woman who lives next to the river?
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︎ Jan 22 2020
What's the only river that thinks it's a stream?
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︎ Feb 01 2020
De Nile is also the longest river in the world...
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︎ Nov 01 2019
My friend wanted me to go skinny dipping with her in the river the divides Paris. I told her to go without me..
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︎ Feb 09 2020
If I fell into the river that flows through Paris...
...am I legally in Seine?
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︎ Jan 13 2020
Why wouldn't the hipster swim in the river?
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︎ Mar 23 2019
My dad has a camera pointing at the river outside
He likes to keep up with current events.
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︎ Jul 05 2019
A man on one side of a river shouts to a man standing on the other side, βHey, how do I get to the other side of the river?β
The other man responds, βYou are on the other side of the river.β
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︎ Nov 03 2016
Salmon are born in a river, swim out to sea for most of their lives, and then one day years later swim back against insurmountable odds to the very spot where they were born.
And I canβt find my car in the parking lot.
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︎ Nov 22 2019
I read that Russia opposes Israel's annexation of parts of the West Bank, well Putin can just go Crimea river
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︎ Sep 12 2019
What did one beaver say to the other at the river?
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︎ Sep 04 2019
Did you hear about the paraplegic who threw himself into the river while on vacation in Egypt?
The crowd told him he wouldn't be able to swim, but he was in denile.
Come to think of it, I heard about a guy in France doing the same thing, but I'm pretty sure he was inseine.
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︎ Oct 15 2019
Did you hear about the Parisian that got so sad when he saw Notre Dame burn, that he threw himself in the river?
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︎ Apr 16 2019
A family of beavers walk across a river. Then the dad said to the family.
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︎ Sep 02 2019
If your boat turns upside down in the river, you can wear it on your head.
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︎ Jul 19 2019
Did you know the Mississippi River is a girl?
If it were a guy weβd have to call it the Mistersippi River!
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︎ Nov 03 2019
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