A list of puns related to "The Republicans"
They insist on bringing a baby to full term.
Because he had to be always right.
What did the democrat say to the republican at the dinner?
Will you pass the bill already?!
Because I want to hear a news anchor say "Today republicans tried to pass G.A.S., but Obama blocked the move with a veto."
He removed free throws
Marc O'Rubio.
He was slo-wakian'.
After all, the Republicans can't say no to A. Blinken!
Think back to the strategy employed by the Tea Party to primary out moderate Republicans and replace them with extremists.
The party kept the same name and in many ways yes kept the same policies, but underwent fundamental changes by replacing many of its parts with new, different ones, while still being the same party.
Would this strategy be called the Vote of Theseus?
Years ago I used to use a LexisNexis database of companies that would give corporate information like name, address, and general business description. While most of them were pretty bland, there were a bunch of them with some really cheesy puns, and over a few years I built quite a collection.
Today I share with you "NEXIS IS RIDICULOUS.txt":
I made a dad joke about the stakes for the republican debate being pretty high... Obviously not Trump Steaks, that was a failed business of his, along with Trump Airlines. GF hits back, "Yeah I don't think that one ever got off the ground!" She even knew exactly what she was saying.
Me: it baffles me how Trump has made it this far and is leading in the Republican Party.
Dad: well, he's obviously just "trump"ed the competition.
I tried not to give him the satisfaction of laughing. But I did.
So I Have never been close to my dad because he is old school. You know, republican, really catholic, really fit, clean hair cut, big sports fan, etc. He can be funny but really only shows his fun side with the little kids in the family or his brothers.
Well my little sister is incharge or answering the house phone and when she was younger this happened a lot:
Sister: hello?(pause) hangs up phone Dad: who was it? Sister: nobody Dad: oh, i told him to stop calling. Well what did Nobody want? Sister: What ? Dad: you said Nobody called, i asked what he wanted. Sister: Nooooo, nobody called Dad: i know he called, what did he want
This would go on for a while
he saw a sticker of the republican elephant and three smaller elephant's on the back of a minivan that under it wrote "I am raising my children RIGHT"
He followed by saying "no wonder they are left behind"
I just got my car fixed, and my dad called me to ask how it was running. I told him that it was fine for the most part, but for some reason it had problems turning left. To this, he replied "Hah! It must be Republican like your mother and me. We have problems turning left too!"
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