Bit of a week excuse if you ask me.
I said, they absolutely have space- he’s only 20 inches and 6 lbs. [holding my hands up showing how small he is].
u
The Doctor told him it was a brief-case.
She asks me to bring it drop it off at the lab for her and I ask, “where do I drop it off?”
She says, “Go in the front door and there’s a little desk that you -“
“Don’t you mean a LITTLE STOOL!?”
... I hope you guys enjoy that as much as I did. True story happened today!
I think he is slowly losing the plot...
I honestly didn’t think they could hold signs.
He replies “I know, this sub is full of reposts”
Hear today, groan tomorrow.
“I don’t know, you’re the one with a job”
And the rope replies, “I’m a frayed knot.”
Hare today, gone tomorrow.
I asked him, "Jim, your name isn't Collin. What's going on?"
He replied, "We're trying to Collin-ize the area."
(True story)
I got the Benz.
Lacks Cetacean..
They were brothers in arm.
They called a company who came out to replace the glass, it happened again two days later so the company came back again and replaced it. My neighbour asked why it was happening and the company told him that it was happening a lot in the area, and that a local animal was eating the putty we use to hold the glass in. My neighbour asked him what kind of animal could possibly do that??? He said yes it’s a cat..... A putty cat......
Samsung
Again, the bartender tells him, "No, the bar does not serve grapes, has never served grapes and, furthermore, will never serve grapes."
The duck thanks him and leaves.
The next day, the duck returns, but before he can say anything, the bartender yells, "Listen, duck! This is a bar! We do not serve grapes! If you ask for grapes again, I will nail your stupid duck beak to the bar!"
The duck is silent for a moment and then asks, "Got any nails?"
Confused, the bartender says no.
"Good!" says the duck. "Got any grapes?"
She said she'd love to and she's very flexible
Turns out it was a multiplication table.
I got the Benz.
