Having trouble finding on google! It’s the one where the older brother kicks the ball and it knocks over both the little boy and little girl. Please help!
Just went to takeout and they said I can't double swipe anymore because of the three swipe policy they just implemented. This does not make sense. Did this happen to anyone else?
So within 10 minutes of my house most of the Chinese restaurants taste pretty bland. I’ve tried them a bunch of times, one of the restaurants actually tastes like if Luby’s made a Chinese dish special. There’s no pho, no Thai food. Recently an Asian barbecue fusion restaurant popped up, but they have 3 warm dishes that I’d eat and only the sushi chefs wear hair nets. So I’d like to know if there is any non-rude way for me to double the seasoning on my food at a typical suburban working class Chinese restaurant. Or would that be the rudest thing ever? Will someone spit in my food? Will there be a turd in my rice bucket? Like one of the restaurants have offered to make it spicier when I requested some pepper sauce so how do I also ask for more of everything else?
Throwaway. There was this guy(22M) who I(20F) have gone on a few dates with in the past couple of months. He's nice and so far we've only progressed to going on public dates, but about a week ago we finally decided to have a nice date at my place. Since it was going to be at my place I let him know before that I was on my period because I wasn't sure what expectations he had or where his boundaries were yet, and we agreed to just have a nice takeout dinner and watch a movie.
He comes over and we eat then sit down on the couch to pick a movie when he says that it sucked that I was on my period Then he said how he thought it was so strange that women give birth through the vagina but have periods from their butts. (This was a completely unpromoted statement from him and I'm still not sure how we got on the topic tbh) I asked him what he meant by that and he said again exactly what he had said before. I kind of smiled, assuming he was very much just joking, and said "oh yeah, so weird" thinking that he was going to start laughing soon to end the joke. He didn't, and instead started to talk about his first and only girlfriend he'd had in high school and how she used to complain about bad "period poops" all the time. At this point I ask him if he is being serious and he looks a little confused and says he is.
I ask him to explain how he came to that conclusion and he explained that his first experience being around periods was the hs gf and before then he had never received or seen much information. He understood it was something that happened inside the body and that blood came out "somewhere" but assumed it came out of the vagina until he heard her complaining and realized it actually came out of the butt. It was very unexpected coming from a 22 year old man. I somehow managed to keep my composure when I told him that periods do in fact come out of the vagina and not butts.
He looked confused and then a little frustrated and started insisting to me that was wrong and then kept saying "are you sure?" as if I was confused about where it came out of my own body. I explained to him the anatomy a bit and how it worked but he was very adamant. Eventually he conceded that most women must have periods like that, but some, hence his ex-gf, have their periods form their butts. He just could not understand no matter how many times I tried to explain it to him that he had just simply come to the wrong conclusion and misinterpreted his gf's words. The whole situation b
... keep reading on reddit ➡I am not OP, this is a repost sub. This is also my first time posting anything here as a big fan of updates so hopefully the formatting and all of that is fine!
The original post: https://www.reddit.com/r/relationships/comments/lg9dml/my_36f_husband_36m_14_years_married_has_a_very/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3
This is an issue that has crept up on me over time. My husband and I are high school sweethearts and have been together almost 20 years. When we first got together, our lives were 100% compatible--we liked the same things and when we didn't it still worked (we wanted similar amounts of hobby alone time, for example), we had the same life goals in terms of "launching" away from our parents and establishing our lives as adults, and we did great! We both have good careers, we bought a house in a city that we love, we kept in touch with our old friends and made new friends together, we got some cats and loved them SO MUCH, we spent time together and laughed a lot. He's very funny, very fun, a great friend, and a pretty good roommate, but to be honest he is not a very good PARTNER.
As tends to happen when you get married very young, we did grow in different directions as we became adults, and my husband turns out to be a very strong personality who is not very flexible/willing to compromise. A few ways this has manifested itself:
- He has strong opinions about how certain things should be done around the house, especially around food, and relatively little patience for things getting messed up or done differently. We are both good cooks and I took the kind of standard advice of "either you can let me do it my way and not complain or you can do it" and he picked do it! We have a CSA/farm share and get takeout a few times a week, but he does all of the grocery shopping otherwise and cooks most of our meals.
- He's also set up some systems in the house that strike me as deeply odd. One example, he's started keeping his old phones when he upgrades so we now have a "music phone" that he uses only to play music and a "tv phone" that he uses only to cast to the tv, I think this is just so strange when we both have our normal phones all the time, they can easily be used for these functions, and it just adds clutter and more things that need to be charged. When he pitches
Went to pick up some takeout last night and the place was packed with around 100 people sat eating and talking inches from each other. The woman at the door, who was double masked with a face shield, told me I couldn’t come in unless I had a mask on. I was literally walking from the door to the counter but ok. I go in and there’s circles painted on the floor telling people where to stand. From 20 feet away the woman tells me my food isn’t ready yet. I go to sit down on the chair by the door but she tells me that it’s “too dangerous” for me to wait there as there are people walking past so I will have to wait outside. I go out in to the freezing cold and watch through the glass door as the woman sprays and wipes the chair I was just sat on. Apparently you can pass covid ass to ass now? Eventually the door cracks open just wide enough for an arm to shoot out and drop the bag of food in to my hands before closing again.
As I walked home I noticed on every street corner there are bright yellow signs reminding you to socially distance. A man stopped and practically cowered against a wall as I walked past him and cars drove past with drivers sat alone at the wheel in face masks.
What do people gain from living like this? Is it mental illness? I’ve never seen anything like this before.
I don't want to step on anybody's toes here, but the amount of non-dad jokes here in this subreddit really annoys me. First of all, dad jokes CAN be NSFW, it clearly says so in the sub rules. Secondly, it doesn't automatically make it a dad joke if it's from a conversation between you and your child. Most importantly, the jokes that your CHILDREN tell YOU are not dad jokes. The point of a dad joke is that it's so cheesy only a dad who's trying to be funny would make such a joke. That's it. They are stupid plays on words, lame puns and so on. There has to be a clever pun or wordplay for it to be considered a dad joke.
Again, to all the fellow dads, I apologise if I'm sounding too harsh. But I just needed to get it off my chest.
- The two weeks will remain two weeks. Agwunobi strongly implies that it will not change.
- Reasoning behind delayed move in is a significantly more contagious variant, with double the capacity compared to the two-week quarantine of previous semesters.
- Spring break is still too far out for UConn to have plans. They want to keep spring break due to student input.
- No flexibility in P/F because of financial aid, accreditation issues, and data showing grades have not been impacted by the pandemic/online learning.
- Add-drop will not be extended because of concerns over students starting classes too late. Students can still petition to drop after the 10th day through normal means.
- <90% online learning will be synchronous, but can't guarantee all synchronous.
- Very unlikely that semester would be extended, would not be feasible for the university to do this.
- Deadline for cancelling housing MAY be extended if professors decide to stay online. Future communication will clarify.
- Students that are not approved to live on campus can come this weekend 9am-8pm to pick up from their dorms.
- Starting off the semester, guests will not be allowed. Will likely change after first few weeks.
- If you tested positive over break, tell SHAW and do not re-test. You can continue to test positive for well after you've recovered.
- NEVERMIND, apparently this wasn't true: Dining halls will keep takeout containers.
- SHAW will have Moderna & Pfizer boosters for people arriving in first few weeks.
- There are no restrictions on leaving campus in February if you live on-campus.
- No refund of tuition, health, transportation, rec center fees. University cannot absorb costs related to these like they can for housing.
- Second part of COVID relief funds will come, go to Financial Aid website for more information.
Ok, so to start with, I fully recognize a lot of this could have been prevented if I had brought these things up ahead of time. Truthfully, it didn't even occur to me that these things could have been problems, so major lesson learned for the future on my part. I also realize that I didn't technically need the photos back to announce our elopement, its me clinging to a picture I had in my head based on the plan we had in place.
TL;DR: Its been 10 weeks and we only have half of our photos, I asked for TIFFs of our gallery because I want to do Christmas cards and a photobook and our photographer at first didn't know what a TIFF file is and now seems to not want to give them to us. We've been delayed three times and have no idea when the full gallery will be delivered. Additionally, although I haven't shared this with our photographer yet, the photos we got back were honestly so terrible it makes my heart hurt. My question is, now that I'm in this mess, what do I do? I just want TIFFs of what we paid for and to never have to deal with this person ever again.
This is a long post, and I'm sorry for that.
My husband and I got married on September 21st. (Do you remember...? Ok, couldn't help it, I'll stop now) We booked coverage for the wedding itself and for a day-after shoot.
We had a very small wedding, only immediate family and our best friends present. We didn't tell anyone except the attendees we were getting married. Our plan was to have the wedding and then use the sneak peaks to make an elopement announcement to go up on social media and also to mail out to relatives. To help relatives who couldn't attend not feel left out, we were also going to make photo books with photos from both shoots to send out as Christmas gifts.
In the consult we had before even booking with them, we explained the plan, especially the bits about using the sneak peaks for an announcement and about the eventual photo book. When asking what sort of volume of photos we could expect, the photographer told us that they "didn't believe" in limiting the number, and that we would get nearly every shot taken. We were told we could expect our gallery 2-3 weeks from the wedding.
For three weeks we got no communication from the photographer. At the three week mark I emailed and asked if we could get any sneak peaks and if we could get an ETA on our gallery.
>Hello!!
>
>I hope you are doing well (: I was wondering if maybe we could get some sneak peek pics from the we
I started hooking up with this girl four weeks ago and since then we've met three times. This past week we went ice skating and were in close quarters with pretty much 200 people. I went clubbing without her the next night, on Saturday. Then I skipped Sunday and went clubbing again on Monday.
I bounce between at least 4 clubs on a night out, so I probably mixed with 3000 or more people. Pretty much coming in contact with them and rubbing against them since it's a night club after all.
Now, she works unsociable hours and is a little broke so I don't imagine she did much. Yet a few days ago she texted me to say she'd caught COVID. We'd planned to go ice skating again on the 23rd so that might have thrown a wrench at things.
I asked if she was vaxxed. She said yes. I told her I'm antivaxx, knowing full well that might end things between us and explicitly foreshadowing that. I'd seen some red flags by then anyway -- the main three being extreme leftism, bigotry against white women in particular, and sheepish thinking -- so I was happy to self-destruct things at this point. I knew exactly how this would go down.
She proceeded to say, "I can't believe I let you fuck me." I pointed out that she's vaccinated yet she's sick as a dog. I've exposed myself to COVID 15x more than her yet I'm in rude health. She ignored that and bizzarely asked me to order her takeout, which I declined to do.
She got in contact with me later yesterday to say my views on vaccines were abhorrent and she no longer wanted to see me. I blocked her and that was that.
What I still don't understand is how these people think. She's double-vaccinated and she's sick with a hellish fever. I'm not, yet I'm fine even while putting myself "in harm's way" multiple times a week. Yet somehow I should be turning to them for medical advice? When I'm seeing them drop like flies? LOL!
Just sharing this here because it was a really odd episode showing how the Cult Of The Vaccine has blocked all rational thinking among its devotees.
I pulled my truck up to the drive through only Taco Bell in my neighborhood. Through a mix of sleet and fog, I can barely make out the illuminated sign as I roll through the parking lot.
“Try our new chicken wings.”
That’s precisely what I’m here to do, thanks for the affirmation, sign. I don’t often fall for the silly and often half baked ideas that food scientists concoct deep in the lair of Yum! Brands. ($YUM) These artificially scarce food items range from the boring to the downright gross. (Looking at you, waffle breakfast taco…) The release of the vaguely named Mexican queso seasoned wings struck me as sane as anything else this franchise does, but unlike the ill fated breakfast menu, I knew I had to taste these for myself.
I placed my order, a conservative twelve wings and one Dorito Locos Taco, split between my girlfriend and I. As I pulled up the window to retrieve my food and pay for my meal, ($13.99 after tax.) the entire staff was crowded around the delivery window. It seems like it’s a slow night in the kitchen. As I completed the transaction, a young man from the kitchen staff shouted “I threw in six extra wings for you.” Clearly this was not only a member of the taco bell staff, but also a shareholder of the Yum! corporation. Never fear for the fate of your calls, young one, because my review of these twelve wings are about to send the $YUM ticker into a frenzy.
Bag secured, I gave a proper thank you to the staff for hooking it up. The moment the brown paper bag was handed into my truck, the slick and unctuous aroma of fried chicken filled the cab. Let’s get these home to papa for a real evaluation.
Upon arrival at the Gourd residence, I laid these out on my table, preparing for anything that was to come. Securing proper utensils, (freshly washed hands and some paper towels) I cracked open the small brown takeout box. The young man at Taco Bell wasn’t kidding, he had stuffed a double helping of wings into the box. The spread looked good, there were in total eight flats and four drums. This struck the perfect balance to me, thus ending forever the flat vs drum debate that has torn apart lesser reddit subs. (But not our regal SSYC.)
The wings are dry-rubbed, a smart choice seeing as nearly 20% of American meals are now consumed behind the wheel. Included within the box holding the wings is a sauce that Taco Bell is calling “spicy ranch.” This sugar laden swill is something I truly learned to avoid upon first dip… but we are gettin
... keep reading on reddit ➡It’s always been a nightmare of mine. Getting kicked out.
When I was a kid I had this weird obsession with dreaming about being thrown out, which didn’t make sense because my parents are good people—and yet my younger self saw them as terrible monsters.
My mom and dad supported me through my childhood but still, there I was, dreaming my father was throwing me onto the streets at 7 years old with nothing but my SpongeBob backpack, spilling an unnecessary amount of books and a dozen candy bars. It was always snowing in my dreams, and I was ankle deep in the stuff but I was never cold. It’s a well-known fact that you can feel what happens in your dreams, whether it’s being stuck in a flurry of swirling white snow or being stabbed in the gut by the boogieman under your bed. I never felt the cold of the snow or the numbness of my bare fingers and toes. I didn’t feel anything. There was never a reason for these dreams. I loved my parents and my vanilla life of playing with dolls and arguing with my brother over whose turn it was on the PS3.
In my mind, I knew I was safe.
I had parents that loved me and a roof over my head. I would always have that security. The dreams didn’t scare me but they did make me wonder if there was something wrong—deep, deep down. That wasn’t normal for a seven-year-old, right? I remember being into the Nancy Drew books. Anything which was mystery or fantasy—of course read to me by mom—I ate it up. All those imaginary worlds fascinated me and I was bored with my own mundane life. Maybe I craved my very own adventures.
Like the ones in those fictional worlds.
Or I was a fucking psychopath.
I don’t know. I never really thought about it again.
Until 11 years later.
“Issac.” I knocked again. Harder this time. “Let me in.”
I was surprised how calm my tone was considering the situation; I’d already been having a pretty shitty day. Sleeping through my alarm was bad, but I wasn’t ready for what the day had in store for me. I’d managed to forget my jacket in sub-zero temperatures, been yelled at in class for not fully paying attention, and then I’d had to present a group presentation on my own—after my teammates bailed on me last minute. That went as well as you would expect, considering I’d done all the work the night before which was the primary reason why I was so out of it. The cherry on the top of my day from hell came much later when I found myself locked out of the student house I shared with three others.
I’m not going to s
... keep reading on reddit ➡My(22M) wife(26F) has been eating all of the food I make everyday since she got pregnant a month ago. I tried making enough for her and me. However, I'd come home to no food because she'd eat my portions too. I tried making double portions but she'd then snack on that and finish that as well. I tried ordering food for both of us after coming home(which I usually don't because I'm vegan and vegan takeout is quite expensive where I live) but she'd still eat my food as well as her food.
I was getting more and more irritated so I added nuts in my portions and marked the container with "CONTAINS NUTS" in bold. I kept my nuts containing food in the mini fridge in my room.
I made food enough for 3 meals for her with no nuts and kept that separate in the fridge in the kitchen area. She's allergic to nuts so she didn't eat my portions after seeing "contains nuts" written on the container.
I finally came home to some food I could eat. She was mad at me because I used her food aversion to stop her from eating my portions.
AITA?
PS: we sleep in different rooms because I roll a lot while asleep and since she's pregnant we did not want any accidental injuries.
Edit: I've tried talking to her about her eating up all of my food but she just says that I should be a man and suck it up, that she's eating for two now and it's my responsibility to keep her fed.
Edit 2: I also add mushrooms alternatively to the nuts since she hates the smell and texture of mushrooms
Hi, my name's Jay and I'm a delivery guy.
No, I don't work for Uber Eats or Skip The Dishes. The place I work for is an old-school delivery company. We service the entire town of Hollow’s End with pizza, beer, takeout food, cigarettes, and just about anything else you can think of within reason. Cash only - no debit or credit cards. We don't use an app or take orders by text or email.
The owner of Doc’s Delivery Service is - you guessed it - named Doc. He’s an obese, disheveled, white-haired curmudgeon who never leaves his smoke-filled house and refuses to make any changes to his business plan despite new advancements in technology or just rational common sense.
Rather than communicating via sensible means like text message, we have to wire up our cars with these absurd three-foot tall antennas and he calls us up on a portable radio to give us our assignments. Then at the end of the day we each go to his ramshackle house to settle up with him and collect our fees.
Along with the equipment never changing, our wages never do either. The rest of the crew seems to have accepted that we will forever get a measly two dollars per delivery - regardless of the distance being driven - while Doc sits on his ass at home collecting some ungodly sum which grows larger by the year.
So basically I work for tips. Which means the customer is always right and I’m always the asshole.
KRRRRSSSSSSHHHHH
The radio was blaring to life as I sat waiting in the parking lot outside Randy’s Rotisserie - we got a lot of calls this time of night to deliver for them, so it seemed like a good spot to hang out.
“Jay, what’s your twenty?”
The voice on the radio was barely identifiable as human, but I had been through this enough times that I didn’t need to actually hear the words he was saying anymore - it was more about his inflection - primarily how pissed-off he sounded.
“Outside Randy’s. What’s up?”
“Can you drive over to the west end to Mario’s Pizza and grab an order?”
That was all the way on the other side of town, across the bridge. A good twenty minutes. And Mario's had a thirty minute delivery guarantee. But you don’t argue with Doc, not unless you wanted to be picking up the shittiest calls imaginable for the next week as his sick form of revenge.
“Okay, I’m going.”
“Ten-four. Oh, and the order is for Frank, by the way.”
With that the radio went dead.
Shit. Not Frank. Anybody but Frank again. I really needed to start refusing to g
... keep reading on reddit ➡The doctor says it terminal.
Alot of great jokes get posted here! However just because you have a joke, doesn't mean it's a dad joke.
THIS IS NOT ABOUT NSFW, THIS IS ABOUT LONG JOKES, BLONDE JOKES, SEXUAL JOKES, KNOCK KNOCK JOKES, POLITICAL JOKES, ETC BEING POSTED IN A DAD JOKE SUB
Try telling these sexual jokes that get posted here, to your kid and see how your spouse likes it.. if that goes well, Try telling one of your friends kid about your sex life being like Coca cola, first it was normal, than light and now zero , and see if the parents are OK with you telling their kid the "dad joke"
I'm not even referencing the NSFW, I'm saying Dad jokes are corny, and sometimes painful, not sexual
So check out r/jokes for all types of jokes
r/unclejokes for dirty jokes
r/3amjokes for real weird and alot of OC
r/cleandadjokes If your really sick of seeing not dad jokes in r/dadjokes
Punchline !
Edit: this is not a post about NSFW , This is about jokes, knock knock jokes, blonde jokes, political jokes etc being posted in a dad joke sub
Edit 2: don't touch the thermostat
Do your worst!
How the hell am I suppose to know when it’s raining in Sweden?
Just moved, looking for the best pizza!
