Richard Shepard Puns

Saw The Shepards of Calamity for first time last night. That's what I love about Criterion Channel, there's always a hidden gem just waiting to be discovered, and what a joy when you find one. Had never heard of it and would not have watched if not for the comments by Richard Linklater in Adventures in Moviegoing on the channel. Linklater mentioned the stunning black and white landscape cinematography in the film, and that was the hook for me. It's as if Ansel Adams was the cinematographer on the long shots. Good film overall, with really great acting, particularly imo by the old man/father and his nemesis old woman/mother of the other main family. The lead actress playing the daughter of the "old man/father" was stunning, and just a great ensemble of other actors and their respective characters. Linklater talks about the film: https://www.criterionchannel.com/richard-linklater-s-adventures-in-moviegoing/season:1/videos/richard-linklater-on-shepherds-of-calamity

I almost don't want to say too much more about the plot of this film. I went into it entirely cold and I feel that is perhaps the best approach.

Stylistically the film had a few clunky moments (this does include poor CGI effects during the first act, I am afraid, but these arguably could be forgiven). A couple of plot-points were left rather hazy, but it did not detract from the main storyline.

Camerawork, acting and music were all fabulous, but what really made me feel the urge to write about this film, was the ending.

Without spoiling it, or overhyping, I just want to say I think they "stuck the landing" with it. All in all, a very satisfying conclusion (something I'm sure a lot of us are now hyper-sensitive of currently coughGoTcough).

Would love to hear some thoughts on it! Personally I thought it was a captivating little horror flick.

The world of indie wrestling never sleeps it seems. This weekend is no different, as we have a slew of shows on both IWTV and Fite.

Thursday

The action begins tonight at 7:30 EST with AIW's Ether, streaming on IWTV. Max Caster takes on Derek Dillinger in a featured bout.

Card

• Hoodfoot vs Kaplan
• Megan Meyers vs Katie Arquette
• Members Only vs Casey Carrington and Brian Carson
• The Duke vs Levi Everett
• The Von Engelands vs Bulking Season
• Zach Nystrom vs Isaiah Broner
• Big Twan Tucker vs Evan Amrbose
• Uncle Chase Burnett vs Johnny Patch vs Riley Rose vs TKD

Then, also on IWTV, at 8 pm, Beyond brings us the second episode of Wrestling Open. Designed to showcase a lot of the rising stars in indie wrestling that haven't quite gotten that spotlight yet, alongside some more recognizable faces. If you watched Elevation this week, you may have seen Ryan Clancy and B3CCA, the former debuted on last week's episode and the latter a mainstay of Beyond as of late.

Only one match announced

Alec Price vs Kylon King

As the format is more of a "here's who's on the show. But you don't known what they're gonna do." Other names announced

• SLADE
• Riley Shepard
• Kennedi Copeland
• Blaxstrom
• CPA
• Eric James
• Ichiban

Friday

GCW continues the road to Hammerstein with a double header weekend. Coming to us from Detroit with Most Notorious, available on Fite

Card

• Six Way Scramble Match

Nate Webb vs. Gringo Loco vs. Jimmy Lloyd vs. Jordan Oliver vs. Dante Leon vs. Ninja Mack

• Singles Match

Alex Shelley vs. Jimmy Jacobs

• Singles Match

Rhino vs. Matt Cardona

• Singles Match

Dark Sheik vs. Tony Deppen

• Singles Match

Matthew Justice vs. Atticus Cogar

• GCW Ultraviolent Title Match

Alex Colon (c) vs. Hoodfoot

• Singles Match

Rich Swann vs. Leon Ruff

• Tag Team Match

2 Cold Scorpio & Ricky Morton vs. BUSSY (Allie Katch & Effy)

House of Glory gets in on the action with Who Runs The World? Girls, an 8 woman tournament to crown a new HOG women's champion. Airing on Fite.

Card

• HOG Women's Title Tournament First Round Match

Sumie Sakai vs. Deonna Purrazzo

• HOG Women's Title Tournament First Round Match

Jordynne Grace vs. Janai Kai

• HOG Women's Title Tournament First Round Match

Mercedes Martinez vs. Natalia Markova

• HOG Women's Title Tournament First Round Match

Santana Garrett vs. Violette

And finally, West Coast Pro brings it home with Situation Critical on IWTV.

Card

• Nicole Sav

He's been on the tip of my tongue for while now please help. He's a b-lister for sure.

Update: I'm not trolling. Not skinny like Michael Cera or Jesse Eisenberg.

Evan Jones or Randall Tex Cobb like brute face with a dark brown or black haired curly medium length hair.

Update 2: He is medium build even slightly buff. Please quit suggesting skeletors and vegans.

Update 3: he doesnt have a brent hinckley smooshed hotdog skinny head. More like a minecraft cinder block square head.

Update 4: I am finishing up work right now. I will make a list of who its not tonight. Its definitely not badger from breaking bad but the head shape is like that as well as the dumb face.

Update 5: people he is not:

John C. Reilly

Jake Johnson

TJ Miller

Ike Barinholtz

Taran Killam

Donnie Wahlberg

Will Ferrell

Vince Vieluf

Jesse Plemons

Jay Baruchel

Mark Ruffalo

Vince Vaughn

Richard Simmons

Ronald McDonald

Jesse Eisenberg/Michael Cera

Dirt Nasty

Andy Samberg

David Koechner

Brenden Fraser

John C. Mcginley

Rob Schneider

Carrot Top

John Leguizamo

Kevin Dillon

Brendan Sexton III

Joshua Jackson

Seth Rogen

Howie Mandel

Bobby Cannavale

Rory Cochrane

Geoffrey Arend

Simon Amstell

Jason Biggs

Michael Rappaport

Guillermo Diaz

Pauly Shore

Chris O'Dowd

Ben Schwartz

Andy Samberg

Bobby Moynihan

Josh Gad

Adrian Grenier

Ken Marino

Ethan Embry

Matt Jones

Garrett Hedlund

Dax Shepard

Edward Burns

Zach Galifinakis

Steve Zahn

Andrew Keegan

James Franco

Diedrich Bader

Adam Devine

Rob Mcelhenney

Jemaine Clement

Flea

Norm MacDonald

Jonah Hill

Troy Gentile

Curtis Armstrong

Adam Herschman

Clark Duke

Jason Clarke

Vincent D'onofrio

Chris Morris

Michael Ian Black

Danny Mcbride

Jeff Ross

Ethan Suplee

Adam Sandler

Dan Fogler

Chris Marquette

Aaron Himmelstein

Giovanni Ribisi

Evan Jones

Frank grilo

David krumholtz

David masterson

Kevin Corrigan

Colm Meany

James Roday

Chris D'elia

Samm Levine

Ike barinholtz

Billy Crystal

David Walton

Dash Mihok

Dan Petronijevik

Lee Evans

Peter MacNicol

Steve Guttenberg

French Stewart

Nick Jonas

Trace Talbot

Nick Swardson

Marv from Home Alone

Randall Tex Cobb

Update 6: I've checked and responded to just about every comment. If the correct answer doesnt materialize by morning I am going to gild the first Randall Tex Cobb and Evan Jones response on the thread and call it a day. It still feels like an itch I can't scratch but it is what it is.

I don't want to step on anybody's toes here, but the amount of non-dad jokes here in this subreddit really annoys me. First of all, dad jokes CAN be NSFW, it clearly says so in the sub rules. Secondly, it doesn't automatically make it a dad joke if it's from a conversation between you and your child. Most importantly, the jokes that your CHILDREN tell YOU are not dad jokes. The point of a dad joke is that it's so cheesy only a dad who's trying to be funny would make such a joke. That's it. They are stupid plays on words, lame puns and so on. There has to be a clever pun or wordplay for it to be considered a dad joke.

Again, to all the fellow dads, I apologise if I'm sounding too harsh. But I just needed to get it off my chest.

Hello everyone. I’m glad to tell you that old John C. Thomas is alive and well here in 2022. But it was a close call! I almost did join the Master Frame Builder upstairs.

It all started this Thanksgiving. We invited our family over. I, of course, had slaughtered, prepared and cooked the Thanksgiving Turkey exclusively with Black and Decker products. And of course my oldest daughter came into town from The College with…him. And that’s where it all started. My wife had prepared something called a Tofuturkey to accommodate the young vegetarian against my wishes. Call me old fashioned, but if the Good Lord hadn’t intended us to eat animals, he wouldn’t have made them taste delicious. “What you eat today, walks and talks tomorrow” my grandad used to say.

At any rate, the young feller started going on and on about “Late Stage Capitalism” and some woman called “AOC” and other fancy shmancy things I didn’t really understand. But then when dinner was over we brought out the Pumpkin Pie. That boy proposed a toast. To his credit he thanked me and my wife for our hospitality, and then he dropped to his knees and presented my daughter with a ring. Now of course, this wasn’t a good old fashioned diamond ring, like the one I gave my wife all those years ago. This was a “Polka-Mon” themed ring that said “I choose you” on the outside of the ring box. And instead of a simple black ring box this one was a round ball with red and white colors on it. He said something to my daughter about wanting to be her “domestic life partner” but honestly at that point, I was having a hard time understanding what folks were saying. I began to have a strange taste in my mouth, and begun to think that I had eaten a bite of that tofuturkey by mistake. I don’t remember anything after that.

The next thing I knew I was in a good old fashioned woodshop. The Good Shepard and Jimmy Carter were both there. Just two great carpenters, working side by side. I saw there was an extra work bench with a mallet and a black and decker toolcase. I was getting ready to sit down but MY PRESIDENT stopped me.

“Not yet,” he said, “You have more frames to build at home first, son.”

“I’m pretty sure I’m all caught up with my work, sir,” said I. Then the Lord turned from his work and said to me.

“The next frame you must build is the frame for your new family. Judge not less ye be judged, my son. And that includes that strange young man who has stolen your daughter's heart.”

And then I woke up. I was in a

Do your worst!

They were cooked in Greece.

I'm surprised it hasn't decade.

For context I'm a Refuse Driver (Garbage man) & today I was on food waste. After I'd tipped I was checking the wagon for any defects when I spotted a lone pea balanced on the lifts.

I said "hey look, an escaPEA"

No one near me but it didn't half make me laugh for a good hour or so!

Edit: I can't believe how much this has blown up. Thank you everyone I've had a blast reading through the replies 😂

It really does, I swear!

Because she wanted to see the task manager.

Heard they've been doing some shady business.

but then I remembered it was ground this morning.

Edit: Thank you guys for the awards, they're much nicer than the cardboard sleeve I've been using and reassures me that my jokes aren't stale

Edit 2: I have already been made aware that Men In Black 3 has told a version of this joke before. If the joke is not new to you, please enjoy any of the single origin puns in the comments

BamBOO!

They’re on standbi

I’m planning to read the following

1. Sapiens
2. The code breaker
3. 34 Patients
4. Empire of pain

What are you planning to read? I’m into medical/memoir type books so if you have any of those to recommend, please do. I’ve already read Stephen westaby and Richard Shepard for example.

A play on words.

My daughter, Chewbecca, not so much.