Q Unique Puns

Hello everyone, I'm planning on asking someone to prom for my first time and I don't have any unique puns. She's an Indian girl and I'm from Spain, she loves "KozyShack Rice Pudding" and "Halos Mandarins"

Unique up on it.

How do you catch a tame bird?

Tame way, unique up on it.

(This was actually my Dad's favorite Dad joke. Happy Birthday, Dad!)

Unique up on it

A few years ago, we started a show that I quite frankly never thought would work.

Nearly four years later, including two sold out appearances at San Francisco Sketchfest and a local TV featurette, our show "Capitol PUNishment" is now streaming on Twitch Friday night at 8:30pm PST.

I hope it's ok to post this in here. If not, feel free to remove with no hard feelings. Just encouraging pun lovers to check out what is best described as "a fast-paced, in-the-moment spectacle that combines everything you love about gameshows, rap-battles, and "dad" jokes, into a unique and hilarious competitive format."

Our channel is twitch.tv/capitolpuns
Here's a little video to help paint the picture: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=C2RE9PgmfXo

So a guy decides he wants to buy the world's most unique pet. He goes to the pet store.

He looks at a cat and a dog. Not unique enough.

He looks at a hamster and a guinea pig. Please.

The pet store guy shows him a porpoise in a tank. He says "what's unique about that" and the pet store guy says "this one will live forever".

So he buys two.

He takes them home and puts them in his bathtub.

He feeds them. He tries feeding them fish, shrimp, waffles, everything. They won't eat anything.

So he goes back to the pet store, and says "they won't eat anything I give them" and the pet store guy says "Oh yeah, I forgot to tell you, the only thing they will eat is mynah birds."

He says "mynah birds. Really?" and the pet store guy says "yep".

So he buys a couple mynah birds and takes them home.

When he gets home, there's a lion sleeping on his front step. Yes, a lion.

He thinks, that's a little strange, but I've got these mynahs and I've got to feed my pets. So he steps over the sleeping lion and takes the mynahs inside.

Just then, a cop jumps out of the bushes and arrests him.

He says "come on! What's the charge"

And the cop says

"transporting mynahs across a sedate lion for immortal porpoises"

I write a pun of the day on the chalkboard where I work and was hoping you guys had some puns that are unique and not very mainstream

Not quite as tragic, but it manifested into something which has haunted me at my job for years.

When I was a little kid learning about the world around me, my dad was naturally the font of all knowledge for me, He would answer all of little snippersmith's questions with his own unique insights and anecdotes teaching me of my surroundings with varying degrees of accuracy.

One day In a picture book, I encountered a photo of one of natures most bizarre creatures, the mighty duck billed platypus. Filled with curiosity of this bizarre creature and an Inability to read a young snippersmith asked his father what this creature was called, To which his father replied,

That's a Quackopotamous.....

As is a highly likely situation in day to day life the Platypus (or indeed the Quackopotamous), did not come into conversation for another 17 years, Until of course the Platypus came into conversation around the lunch table at a now grown up snippersmith's full time place of work.

I have not been allowed to forget I thought the Platypus was called a Quackopotamous, Indeed I am reminded on a daily basis by my colleagues, by my nickname Quackopotamous .

Thanks Dad.

EDIT 1: Holy Cow this took off! Gold! thank you so much.

(Messed up the post the first time)

I am in the unique situation of planning a Pride event on a train. I am looking for a punny name for such train. Please, go wild.

I was expecting to be unique but there were a lot of Chewbaccas. Guess that was a Wookie mistake.

Today, Mexicans celebrate the torpedoing of the U.S.S. Hellmans in the Mexico City harbor.

*Original Content But Quite Possibly Not Unique

P.S. Yes, I know where Mexico City is.

It was a real unique corn.

Unique up on it!

While many have found this unique my wife finds this time consuming.

My dad is a police officer and I was on a ride-along with him. He and his partner arrested a guy for shoplifting. As the perp, whose name is "Unique," is sitting in the back of the car, my dad walks up, looks at me smiling, and says to the suspect "how do you catch a unique criminal? Unique up on em!" He and his partner laughed and high-fived, then just shut the door.

Hi guys, I need to change my username online (mostly used in games) as it's not really something unique ( came from a book I read when I was younger ).

I'm trying to find something quite funny, with plays on words for example. But english isn't my native language and I find it quite hard ! So I'm asking you guys to help me :) You're the best for that imho !

If you could help me find something mixing music (percussions/drums), sciences (my field of study, physics to be more precise), beer and animals maybe (?) (because I like that !)

I think this is possible to find something using some science-specific noun and something else. But I can't seem to find one that suits me :(

One is really fast and the other is stationery.

(I just thought of this one, but it probably already exists in some form because I am not a beautiful and unique snowflake)

One day Mario and Luigi were arguing with eachother after they came across a very unique ghost in their travels. See, this particular spirit had a permanent rain cloud above her head, leaving water wherever she went. Even more curiously, she permanently had her nose buried in a book!

Mario was adamant "No one's ever seen anything like this before. We should contact the librarians in Peaches Castle to document this."

But Luigi was infuriated and set out to prove his brother wrong. After many hours in the library, he threw a monsters compendium on the desk infront of his brother and exclaimed...

"Take a look.

Its in the book.

Its a reading Rain Boo."

http://imgur.com/a/6XENi

(First time posting here, I hope posting a screenshot/imgur link alone doesn't violate any rules! Thought this would be quite a unique post to contribute to the sub.)

Unique up on it!

How do you catch a tame rabbit?

Same way, unique up on it!

best when accompanied by making a sneaky walk motion with your hand

Dad.. Sonhave I ever told you how to catch a unique bunny?

Son... No dad how??

Dad... Unique up on it!!!

It was a unique horn.

Hi! I'm traveling to Korea and can't think of a unique and clever pun for a hashtag. Hope you witty people can help me out!

It was some unique corn.

Unique up on it.

How do you catch a tame rabbit?

The tame way.

Unique up on him.

Unique up on him.

How do you a tame rabbit?

The tame way.

Unique up on it.

Unique up on it

Easy. Unique up on it.

How do you catch a tame bird?

The tame way. Unique up on it!

Unique up on it.

Unique up on it

Unique up on it.

Unique up on it

Unique up on it.

Unique up on it.

Unique up on him!

Unique up on it.

How do you catch a unique rabbit?

You ‘neak up on it.

How do you catch a tame rabbit?

The tame way.

Unique up on it!

How do you catch a tame rabbit?

The tame way, unique up on it!

Easy! Unique up on it.

How do you catch a tame bird? Tame way, unique up on it!

Q: How do you catch a unique rabbit? 
A: Unique up on it
    
Q: How do you catch a tame rabbit?
A: Tame way

Unique up on it

Unique up on him.