My wife said she wanted divorce because i play too many video games
What a stupid thing to fallout 4
Have you noticed that cars are less controllable in video games than in real life?
It's because they're on a hard drive.
Why do assassins and thieves always wear leather armour in video games?
Because it's made from hide!
Mike Tyson plays a lot of video games,
I asked my french friend if she likes to play video games
What is an Alabamians favourite video game?
You have a 2-door car you want to display. You get it detailed. You put it on a platform so everyone can see it. You set up special lighting so all the details shine.
You have just staged a coupe.
I got into an argument with my video game character
He said I was too controlling.
No one will ever make a successful video game about running a coffee shop.
Gamers would never put up with the amount of grinding required.
Why can't shellfish play video games?
They can't gain the mussel memory
Video games are an ex-seal-lent way to "seal" some seally puns!
I get depressed if I don’t play video games.
I always need to console myself.
why didn't the indie lake make a games platform
it was afraid of becoming steam
You know how they throw the ball into the crowd after they win the game?
Apparently that’s not allowed in bowling. I know that now.
I told my kids that "fortnight" was a stupid name for a video game.
What's Owen Wilson's favorite video game?
Grandma is always saying to me ' Hey what's the name of that German guy again who keeps taking my stuff '
Alzheimer, Grandma, it's Alzheimer.
Why does YouTube continually recommend videos of dancing former Vice Presidents?
I guess that's just the Al Gore Rhythm.
A wolf started a YouTube channel, at the end of every video he says …
“Make sure to Lycan subscribe”
I invented a bouncing platform to help obese hobos lose weight.
I call it a Tramp o' Lean
What do you call a potato that uploads video reviews?
A cat video on YouTube had an advert for vaginal itching cream. The algorithm probably got confused by the keyword "pussy".
A conversation I had on a dating app. For context, her instagram is mainly pictures of chairs and her name rhymes with chair.
What game can you only play no more than twice a month?
10 yr old daughter playing video games yells, “GIRL!”
Dad response, “You know it’s true...”
Daughter laughs (she actually likes my Dad jokes... heh) 🙂
Did you know? I certainly didn’t but, that game ‘Mortal Combat’ was originally based upon a very old Scandinavian church song.
>!It was a Finnish Hymn!<
My wife blocked me on Facebook because I post too many bird puns.
Well, toucan play at that game.
What was Hitler's favorite game to play?
Mein-krafft
Edit: corrected the spelling of mein from mien
What's the first game a baby plays?
I watched a video about digging tunnels
I thought, "that's boring"
I saw an ad that read: “TV for sale, $1, volume stuck on full.”
I thought to myself, "I can't turn that down!"
Son is watching Netflix and the video was buffering.......
Son: Do I need to turn out off and on again?
Wife: Just stop hitting the buttons, it's frozen.
Me: No, this is The Secret Life of Pets.
The sweet music of exasperated sighs.
I just found out the Mortal Kombat theme was based on something old
I tried donating blood today... NEVER AGAIN!!! Too many questions.
Like, "Who's blood is this?", "How did you get it?"
"Why is it in a bucket?"
A man is at a sellout football game with an empty seat beside him
The guy behind him notices that the seat is empty and asks why.
"My wife recently passed away. We have season passes and she never missed a game" the man said.
"I'm very sorry to hear that" replied the man behind him."Couldn't you have invited one of your friends to come with you to fill the seat?"
"Oh no!" The man replied. "They're all at the funeral".
If there was a game about erectile dysfunction it would be designed by
I tried to carry my oversized board game onto the plane, but I wasn’t allowed.
They said the Risk was too big.
My son went to school to be a virtual reality game designer.
He never actually did any of his homework
At the weekend, I like to play chess with elderly men in the park. But it's becoming increasingly harder..
..to find exactly 32 of them.
I asked a Frenchman whether he owned any gaming consoles
My wife said she wants a divorce because I play too many video games.
What a stupid thing to Fallout 4. It Sims totally unreasonable.
I asked my French date if she played video games
Do French people play video games?
My wife dumped me for only talking about video games.
It’s such a ridiculous thing to fallout 4
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