I brought a copy of the API protest summary to summer school for my teacher to read, but she was out sick.
How did the cows feel when her kid flunked out of school?
My dog got kicked out of obedience school….
He kept eating his homework
According to recent studies, 6 out of every 10 American school children struggle with mathematics.
I knew we had a problem, but 75% is out of control.
Why do middle school girls hang out in groups of 3, 5, or 7?
Because they like, literally, can’t, even.
I dropped out of barber school
Why did the geometry teacher flunk out of culinary school?
Because his pi(es) r squared.
Kids, don’t drop out of school. Instead try lock picking
It’s opened so many doors for me
This morning on the school run my kid came out with this gem: ‘what’re the guards at Samsung called? … GUARDIANS OF THE GALAXY’
The lead singer of Nickelback tried out for his school Christmas play.....
But he never made it as a wise man
My first gig out of school was directing a TV ad for tampons.
Did you hear about the woman who got thrown out of Mime School?
Apparently it was something she said…
Given that a case of the sniffles means staying home from school, we give my daughter a daily allergy medicine. My wife was giving her breakfast before school, and when I walked out, I asked if she’d had her medicine yet.
My daughter said yes, and I replied, “So you’re de-Claritin that you’ve had it already?”
I decided to drop out of school last night, and today I got an email that there was active shooter situation near my classroom
...I guess I really dodged a bullet there.
(believe it or not this post is based on real-life events 😬)
I was thrown out of music school for plagiarism.
They thought I was stealing songs, but I was just taking notes.
Why did the mime get kicked out of school?
-He was always acting out!
Why did a pirate drop out of school early?
My kids came out of school and told my partner they have made cards for her for Mother's Day. I asked for a card, but they said I had to wait until Father's Day. I told my boy I had made a card for him, and he could have it the day after tomorrow,
Why did the stormtrooper drop out of school?
Why did the tree drop out of school?
He kept failing twigonometry.
They kicked me out of art school when my sculpture didn't work out as planned.
I reached my statue of limitations.
I got kicked out of school for getting married.
I was going for my bachelor’s degree.
I almost failed out of cosmetology school.
So I had to take a few makeup classes.
I was going to be a doctor but they kicked me out of med school when they found out I was a coward...
The dean said, "It takes guts to learn anatomy."
I just took my last exam before graduating out of culinary school.
The final was a piece of cake.
What happens when a trashy person drops out of school?
Prisoner tunnels out of jail and emerges in a school playground shouting “I’m free”!
Little girl walks up and shouts “I’m four!”
Did you hear about the cow who dropped out of school to start a computer business?
My high school did a musical of a guy taking a girl out to dinner...
Which nursery rhyme got Sean Connery kicked out of pre-school?
Why was the lightbulb kicked out of school?
My daughter got kicked out of school for wearing black clothes and make-up
I don't get it, she just goth there.
Why did the Orange drop out of school?
Did you hear about the beautician who flunked out of school?
She didn’t do her makeup work
People who drop out of school have no principals or class.
After explaining to his parents that he was going to drop out of med school and instead focus on being a mime,
they said, "you don't say!"
While making dinner last night I asked my wife if she knew which celebrity failed out of cooking school for not chopping enough.
she had no idea it was Julianne Moore... and I had no idea her eyes could roll like that.
Wife and I picked up our 8 year old son after a school field trip to a pumpkin farm. Son takes it to the next level. Wife about leaped out of the car...
Me: What did they have at the farm?
Son: Pumpkins and gourds.
Me: Did you get to pick one out to take home?
Son: I got a gourd because it looked cool. /shows us multi colored, striped gourd
Me: Gourd for you!
Son: /slightly confused... Yes, I got this gourd.
Me: So... would you say you had a ... gourd time?
Wife: /groans
Son: Ya, I had a gourd time.
Wife: /groans again.
Wife: Really?!
Me: He gets these jokes now. He's all... gourd up now.
Wife: STOP!
Son: Oh, gourd!
One of my favorite dad things to do is to call out to my son as he is walking into the school yard.
Hey buddy
Stops and turns... Yeah dad
Nothing buddy
Works on just about everyone.
Why did the 14th century physician drop out of medical school?
Because he had no sense of humors
My daughter needed a note to get out of school early...
I just took my last exam before graduating out of culinary school.
The final was a piece of cake.
The lead singer of Nickelback tried out for his school Christmas play...
But he never made it as a wise man.
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