I am not the original poster. This is a repost.
Originally posted by u/bringusfiggypudding 7 years ago on r/relationships.
My husband (39 M) is weirdly anal about our Christmas tree and it's starting to piss me (35 F) off [Dec 07 2014]
https://www.reddit.com/r/relationships/comments/2oky9c/my_husband_39_m_is_weirdly_anal_about_our/
Ok, posting with a festive throwaway just in case. Anyway, my husband and I have a really great relationship/marriage, and we have two kids: a five-year-old and a two-year-old. I'm also four months pregnant with our third.
Despite being an atheist my husband LOVES Christmas. I'm not as into it, but hey, he makes it fun. But for some reason, decorating our Christmas tree is the area in which his worst, uncompromising tendencies come out. Husband thinks that the tree has to be decorated in a very exact way or else it will look horrible: very precise layers of glass ornaments, lights, and tinsel. And yeah, it does end up looking great in the end.
The problem is that he won't budge with his efforts to achieve the perfect tree for the kids or anything else. The five-year-old has been asking his father to help decorate the tree, but my husband says no, because our son doesn't know "his system". I'm definitely okay with our kids being told no, but the thing is I have so many fond memories of decorating my tree in a very non-precise, slapdash way with my parents. Those are some of my fondest memories from my childhood and I feel sad my son won't experience them because my husband needs to get something that only stays up for two months "perfect". Besides, I feel like Christmas is more about the kids than adults, and he's being oddly selfish. I told my husband this and in his characteristic, kind of assholish-humor way he said, "Well, your tree must have looked like crap then." I'm not offended because . . . it's a fucking Christmas tree, why does it matter so much??? But I guess that's the core issue.
Also, two years ago one of our cats ate some of the tinsel and almost died. I've begged my husband for two years to stop using tinsel. He refuses, saying the tree looks awesome with it on and that it's my job to prevent "my" cats from eating it then. First of all, we got the cats together. Second of all, I really don't want to add babys
... keep reading on reddit β‘
I don't want to step on anybody's toes here, but the amount of non-dad jokes here in this subreddit really annoys me. First of all, dad jokes CAN be NSFW, it clearly says so in the sub rules. Secondly, it doesn't automatically make it a dad joke if it's from a conversation between you and your child. Most importantly, the jokes that your CHILDREN tell YOU are not dad jokes. The point of a dad joke is that it's so cheesy only a dad who's trying to be funny would make such a joke. That's it. They are stupid plays on words, lame puns and so on. There has to be a clever pun or wordplay for it to be considered a dad joke.
Again, to all the fellow dads, I apologise if I'm sounding too harsh. But I just needed to get it off my chest.
The nurse asked the rabbit, βwhat is your blood type?β
βI am probably a type Oβ said the rabbit.
The doctor says it terminal.
Alot of great jokes get posted here! However just because you have a joke, doesn't mean it's a dad joke.
THIS IS NOT ABOUT NSFW, THIS IS ABOUT LONG JOKES, BLONDE JOKES, SEXUAL JOKES, KNOCK KNOCK JOKES, POLITICAL JOKES, ETC BEING POSTED IN A DAD JOKE SUB
Try telling these sexual jokes that get posted here, to your kid and see how your spouse likes it.. if that goes well, Try telling one of your friends kid about your sex life being like Coca cola, first it was normal, than light and now zero , and see if the parents are OK with you telling their kid the "dad joke"
I'm not even referencing the NSFW, I'm saying Dad jokes are corny, and sometimes painful, not sexual
So check out r/jokes for all types of jokes
r/unclejokes for dirty jokes
r/3amjokes for real weird and alot of OC
r/cleandadjokes If your really sick of seeing not dad jokes in r/dadjokes
Punchline !
Edit: this is not a post about NSFW , This is about jokes, knock knock jokes, blonde jokes, political jokes etc being posted in a dad joke sub
Edit 2: don't touch the thermostat
Do your worst!
How the hell am I suppose to know when itβs raining in Sweden?
Mathematical puns makes me number
We told her she can lean on us for support. Although, we are going to have to change her driver's license, her height is going down by a foot. I don't want to go too far out on a limb here but it better not be a hack job.
Ants donβt even have the concept fathers, let alone a good dad joke. Keep r/ants out of my r/dadjokes.
But no, seriously. I understand rule 7 is great to have intelligent discussion, but sometimes it feels like 1 in 10 posts here is someone getting upset about the jokes on this sub. Let the mods deal with it, they regulate the sub.
They were cooked in Greece.
I'm surprised it hasn't decade.
He lost May
Now that I listen to albums, I hardly ever leave the house.
Two muffins are in an oven, one muffin looks at the other and says "is it just me, or is it hot in here?"
Then the other muffin says "AHH, TALKING MUFFIN!!!"
Don't you know a good pun is its own reword?
Said if she ever hosts a gender reveal party, when it comes time to pop the balloon she'll spray everyone with water.
Gender is fluid.
For context I'm a Refuse Driver (Garbage man) & today I was on food waste. After I'd tipped I was checking the wagon for any defects when I spotted a lone pea balanced on the lifts.
I said "hey look, an escaPEA"
No one near me but it didn't half make me laugh for a good hour or so!
Edit: I can't believe how much this has blown up. Thank you everyone I've had a blast reading through the replies π
It really does, I swear!
And now Iβm cannelloni
Because she wanted to see the task manager.
But thatβs comparing apples to oranges
And boy are my arms legs.
