What do you call a boat-loving Italian?
At what age do you start loving red wine?
You know the worst part about being allergic to bees and loving honey?
What do you call a gun loving, Christian rock band?
I have a loving relationship with the 90s. You kid's today don't get it.
But if you could only see the way they loved me, maybe you would understand.
What do you call an opera singer who can't fight this feeling to keep on loving you?
If you change word "Love" to "Lunch", you can totally change the meaning of a lot of songs.
All You Need Is Lunch
Do You Believe In Life After Lunch
Lunch In An Elevator
What do you call a monk that loves chips?
When your friends know you love puns and send you things like this >>>>>>
I was having a glass of wine with my wife after a long day and I heard her say "I love you so much and always look forward to being with you at the end of the day. I don't know what I'd do without you." "Is that you or the wine talking?" I asked. She replied "It's me...
Choose a major you love
and you'll never work a day in your life because that field probably isn't hiring
"I love you from my heart to-ma-toes"
“I love my job!” exclaimed the farmer. “All you do is boss me around all day!” complained one of his sheep. “What did you say?” challenged the farmer. The sheep glared back and growled...
Do you know what Cthulhu loves on his steak?
Do you know what car someone who loves rhythmical music should own ?
Take it easy people. Pretty soon you'll be able to kiss and have sex with the one you love.
But for now, stay at home and do it with the one you're married to.
I love you
At least... that’s a joke my dad told me all the time
My wife sent me a heartwarming text that read, “If you're sleeping, send me your dreams. If you're laughing, send me your smile. If you're eating, send me a bite. If you're drinking, send me a sip. If you're crying, send me your tears. I love you!”
I replied, “I'm on the toilet, please advise…”
First, I posted this on r/jokes but it didn't get much love. Then I realized I posted it on the wrong joke sub. Y'all love the punny jokes, so here you go:
Why are lamb chops a thing? Why do we have a food named after a baby animal?
Would you ever eat something called puppy steak? Or kitten burger? Or chick fillet?
oh wait.........
Credit goes to Matt from Studio C
If you donate a kidney, everybody loves you and you’re a total hero.
But try donating five kidneys and suddenly everyone is yelling and the police get involved.
If you love Christmas so much...
"Honk if you love Jesus"
"Keep texting while driving, if you are desperate to meet him."
How do you know if your love interest is into you?
Invite them to the gym. If they show up...
♦
...then you know you're working out.
What do you call a mycology student who loves to party
You know why I love jokes about kids of anti-vaxxers?
What do you call an American bee that loves sea ?
Would you call a chiropractor who loves this job
My grandad used to say "If it wasn't for me, you'd all be speaking German right now" Lovely man, terribly bad foreign language teacher.
No idea why the school hired him.
Son, I love you, and I think you rock
But I promise I will never take you for Granite again
You know son, I've always loved tanks...
They are very a-track-tive
What do you call two dudes who love math?
There's been a lot of people who aren't Dad's making Dad jokes on here recently. If you're not a Dad you shouldn't be making Dad Jokes.
Gandhi's Mum: How much do you Love me
Gandhi: From the bottom of Mahatma
In France, They don’t say “I love you”
Because they don’t speak english there.
There is one place in this world where you can truly love yourself.
Thought I heard someone say “Hello” in Arabic
But it was a false Salaam.
What do you call a calculator that works instantly?
What do you call a ghost’s true love?
In the store I saw some brightly coloured greeting cards that said, "I will always love only you "
They sold them in packs of 12.
How do you know when a cat loves you?
When it thinks you're its pajamas!
This isn’t mine and I don’t know who made it, but it’s been on my phone for so many years and I haven’t seen it on here yet. I hope you all love it as much as I do.
How do you know all woodpeckers love heavy metal music?
Because they’re all head bangers. (Credit to my 11 year old).
I listen to every type of music except heavy metal
Because heavy metals are toxic.
(I -22f- have created this joke when i was 15, I was waiting for an opportunity to disgust people with it. So here you go reddit lol)
A friend set me up on a blind date. He said "She's a lovely girl, but there's something you should know. She's expecting a baby"
I felt like a right idiot sitting in a bar wearing nothing but a diaper.
Did you hear about the two houses that fell in love with each other?
It was a lawn-distance relationship
What do you call a bear that both loves and hates to travel?
What do you call the love between two people that never engage in sexual activity and love eating a lot?
I sat down for dinner at a restaurant, and the waiter asked me, “Do you want to hear today’s special?”
I said, “Yes please.”
Waiter: “No problem sir. Today is special.”
Edit: You guys are way too generous. Thank you.
What do you call a monkey that loves chips?
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