When UB40.
Breaking into hives
Guns N' Moses
But if you could only see the way they loved me, maybe you would understand.
Aria Speedwagon
https://preview.redd.it/phwxjjhktcz61.png?width=1024&format=png&auto=webp&s=f977c05db5fe9ea3e65904f04f47b6f6d9438c4d
A tender tender tender.
Nothing you can do, it’s a turtle eclipse of the heart
Fun Gus
All You Need Is Lunch
Do You Believe In Life After Lunch
Lunch In An Elevator
“I do!"
A chipmunk!
I replied, “I'm on the toilet, please advise…”
“You herd me!"
In jewels It's an engineering joke
and you'll never work a day in your life because that field probably isn't hiring
...talking to the wine."
But try donating five kidneys and suddenly everyone is yelling and the police get involved.
At least... that’s a joke my dad told me all the time
My wife has been teaching my son to fold his own laundry but he complains about it everytime. My wife, trying to convince my son, said to him "If you pick up this habit, your future wife will love you very much."
My son replied "I don't want my future wife to love me very much. I want my future wife to help me fold my laundry."
I busted out laughing. But the end result is that now I have to fold my own laundry going forward.
No sun
EDIT: oh my god 1k upvotes! THIS like, tripled my post karma. You guys are incredible. Much love!
But for now, stay at home and do it with the one you're married to.
A Honda Beat.
H. P. Sauce!
Why are lamb chops a thing? Why do we have a food named after a baby animal?
Would you ever eat something called puppy steak? Or kitten burger? Or chick fillet?
oh wait.........
Credit goes to Matt from Studio C
Why don’t you merry it?
"Keep texting while driving, if you are desperate to meet him."
A fungi
A Crack addict?
But I promise I will never take you for Granite again
Because they don’t speak english there.
Invite them to the gym. If they show up...
♦
...then you know you're working out.
No idea why the school hired him.
It's a faux pa.
USB type-C
Calcunow
They are very a-track-tive
His ghoul-friend.
When it thinks you're its pajamas!
Gandhi: From the bottom of Mahatma
There was once a boy. He was the son of the richest man in the universe. Mark Zuckerberg, Bill Gates, he dwarfed them all. He was a multi-trillionaire. Now, it was this boy's birthday. His father asked him,
"My son. I am the richest man in the universe. I could buy you anything you want for your birthday. A store full of lego, all the video games in the world, anything. What would you like?"
His son replied.
"Oh father. It would make me the happiest boy in the world if you could get me one pink ping pong ball."
His father was rather confused by this request. Out of all the things he could've chosen, his son chose a ping pong ball. Nonetheless, he agreed and gave him a pink ping pong ball. His son was overjoyed and spoke to him.
"My father, you have made me the happiest boy in the world. May I go up to my room and play with my pink ping pong ball?"
"Okay son, go ahead."
The boy then went up to his room and played with his pink ping pong ball. When his father went in the next morning to check on him, the boy was sleeping in his bed and the pink ping pong ball was nowhere to be found.
On the boy's next birthday, his father asked him again.
"My son. I am the richest man in the universe. I could buy you anything you want for your birthday. What would you like?"
His son replied.
"Oh father. It would make me the happiest boy in the world if you could get me one box full of pink ping pong balls."
His father was again, confused by this. Still, he bought a cardboard box and filled it with ping pong balls. He gave it to his son, who said.
"My father, you have made me the happiest boy in the world. May I go up to my room and play with my pink ping pong balls?"
The father nodded, and the son went up to his room to play. The next morning when his father went to check, the boy was sleeping peacefully and there were no pink ping pong balls in sight. Just the empty cardboard box in the middle of the room.
On the boy's next birthday, his father asked him again.
"My son. I am the richest man in the universe. I could buy you anything you want for your birthday. What would you like?"
"Oh father. It would make me the happiest boy in the world if you could get me one truck full of ping pong balls."
Now, by this point, the father was extremely confused. Why did the boy want so many pink ping pong balls and where were they going? He asked.
"My son. You are the most precious thing in the world to me and I can certainly get you this, but may I ask, why do you want
... keep reading on reddit ➡In the master bedroom
Hoof Hearted
Look it up. I can’t post the link but you’ll love it
They sold them in packs of 12.
A chipmunk.
