362 days until Christmas and people already have their lights up...
What do you call a woman that would rather stare at her phone than look up at the Northern lights?
Didn't light up on SLPT, maybe y'all will like it.
What lights up a soccer stadium?
Open up your morning light...
Ding heres a light joke to brighten up the world(three jokes in one) (;
Two snails pulled up next to me at a red light.
When the light turned green they sped away.
I looked to my friend and said, “look at that S car go!”
If a light no longer lights up
Is it a light, or a dark?
Lights out lying in bed. My wife just made this up: Which jokes are historians allergic to?
Here's something to light up your life
Say “Rise up lights” out loud.
Congratulations, you can now say razor blades in Australian.
Where does bad light end up?
This one really lights up your day
Sometimes I get tyred of normal jokes and make puns instead. They are quick, easy, and don't put you under pressure. Sometimes, they can be very flat. They can be as light as air, or as heavy as steel. All in all, puns really punp me up!
I'm always able to light up a room
simply by smiling and moving away from the window.
These puns really light me up
Dad pulls up to a red light, Car next to him revs the engine and yells "race?"
If you’re struggling to think of what to get someone for Christmas. Get them a fridge and watch their face light up when they open it.
What do you say when your parents pick you up from your light skinned friend Rachel’s house?
In the supermarket, my son and I saw a cashier holding a customer's note up to the light.
"Is that counterfeit?" my son asked.
I said, "Don't be silly, son. Counters don't exercise."
Too late I realized the new jar of discount mayonnaise felt light. When I opened it up the pristine surface collapsed into a large air pocket.
Yes it was a sinkhole de mayo.
You know when you sneeze and that tiny region in your brain really lights up
There's a small part of me that really enjoys that
Why did the robot’s eyes light up?
He finally got new contacts.
She lights up the room, every time she walks in...
...then again, she’s the only one who knows where the light switch is.
So a friend of mine was putting up Christmas lights and they got stuck in her hair
I got out of bed and my girlfriend asked "Will you turn the lights off while you're up?"
I said "No, but I can turn the lights off while Asia."
Girlfriend cringed
It January second and people already have their Christmas lights up....this is getting ridiculous.
In light of No-Shave November, my best dad joke up to date.
Thomas Edison was the type of guy who really knew how to light up a room.
I could see his eyes light up as I unknowingly provided the set-up.
Me: banging an ice cube tray on the kitchen counter to get the ice out
Dad: Who's making all that racket?
Me: Me, I'm trying to break the ice
Dad: Why, is nobody talking to you? Ahahaaaaaaa.
Dad goes back to eBay
I woke up this morning and my bedside light had turned into a moth...
That's the last time I ever buy a larva lamp…
Setting up Christmas lights with my dad
Me, holding one end of a string of lights: Ok, Dad, grab a side.
Dad: Isn't that what kills grabs?
Me: What?
Dad: Grabacide.
He burst out laughing for a full minute.
How do you light up a soccer stadium?
How do you light up a soccer stadium
Can you believe that people have their Christmas lights up already?
There is still 365 days until Christmas
What lights up a soccer stadium?
Where does bad light end up?
Can't believe people still have Christmas lights up... Christmas was LAST YEAR!
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