A list of puns related to "K Band"
I told him i offered his director some assistance. They said yes.
Now I get to be a band-aid.
Nobody would name their band Pearl Jelly.
I mean they have their problems, but I still think that they are a great band!
Theyβre my favorite cover band.
*Dad is hammering around in the garage*
Son: Whatcha doing?
Dad: I'm thinking about playing in heavy metal band
Because of his contra band...
... I'd probably be band.
They're a pretty good garage band.
Weβre a cover band.
...just into Rubber Bands!
I called it a band in hope.
Brass instruments are band.
We could never quite get a gig.
Edit: I was aware that it's 1024 Meg to a gig, but "a band called 1023 megabytes" doesn't have the same ring to it. Also doesn't getting the IT wrong make it more dad like?
the producer said that we needed to have a symbol for our band. i said sir if we dont have a cymbal how have we been playing the drums?
I was listening to music with my dad recently and we were taking turns playing songs. I played the song βtime has comeβ by the band Europe, from the hot rod soundtrack (Hilarious movie btw). I pointed to my phone and said βEurope!β. My dad yelled βIβm up? Alright!β And started looking for the next song to play. I was like βNo! EUROPEβ and he was like βI KNOW, IM UPβ and proceeded to play the next song. Afterward he said he was just fucking with me. A true dad moment. Thought you guys might appreciate.
The Hus Band!
Shit band anyway
I usually have my band with me
What do you call a rock band that hates nail clippers?
Nine-Inch Nails.
If we ever get to 2021. I will be endlessly talking people that `2020 is hindsight` and the sear terribleness of this pun got all god and Eldridge abominations to band up and try to end humanity before that happens. With this, earthly insight, I decided that everyone must be informed of the pun. It is, my and I can't die peacefully knowing it has not laid its mark on a mortal soul
"Who's there?"
The WHO.
"The band?"
Nope.
"Shit!"
I had recently joined a band as their bassist, whose previous bassist was very punny and also had a long beard like me.
I had made some unmemorable pun, and the guitarist said, "Goddamn it, puns must be related to beards."
I said, "With great length comes greatest pun ability."
Swear to god this is true. Only two people witnessed it. I want you all to be my witnesses.
contra-band
It causes me to deny the existence of certain 80's bands.
There is no Cure!
Canβt believe the sky high prices for tickets to see a band at the Hard Rock stadium this weekend! Anyone heard of the βSuperb Owlβ? Canβt find them on Spotify.
Their band is called Def Leper
Pretty good band, five stars.
...who work together in a French restaurant, making sauces, decided to form a 90s tribute band. They're calling it Bernaise Ladies.
Q: Which side of the turkey has the most feathers?
A: The outside!
Q: Why did they let the turkey join the band?
A: Because he had the drumsticks
Q: What did the turkey say before it was roasted?
A: Boy! Iβm stuffed!
Q: Whatβs the key to a great Thanksgiving dinner?
A: The turKEY
I used to be in a band, we were called βLost dogβ.
Youβve probably seen our posters...
He was instrumental for the band.
We had some drinks, nice guy, wants to be in a heavy metal-band
"A rock and roll band!"
My rock band, the rolling stones, was an instant hit.
Because we're a rock band.
What does the band C&C Music Factory and Ancient Aliens have in common?
Things that make you go Hmmmm... .. . ... . . .
Because otherwise it would b flat.
Compliments of my 6th graders band instructor.
Because we found the rubber band
Me: Hey dad, where are you off to?
Dad: I'm heading out to a Korean boy-band show.
Me: KPOP?!
Dad: Yes, I'm fine.
I don't know what a band knows about health, but I take it with a grain of salt.
The army band.
(Full credit to the elderly gentleman who approached me at the bus stop and shared this beauty).
Our 11 year old is attending a debate camp and at the dinner table she was telling us about her day. We decided she would have a mock debate against my husband the following day so she could show us a bit of what she's learned. We talk about possible topics and we land on "Should school officials or other adults be allowed to ban certain books from school." We talk a little more on the topic of banned books and my husband perks up and says "I think banned books should be allowed because without them, there would be no music." Then he gets this massive grin and my daughter and I are so confused.. it takes a moment for us to realize he's talking about BAND books .. there would be no music .. I had to give it to him, that was heavenly. Our daughters eyes rolled out of her head but we were all laughing. Great job, dad.
Me: Do they ever play this band on the radio? son: of course its imagine dragons. me: so they are active on the radio? son: looks at me for a second, oh jeez me: so they are radio-active!
Turns out they were an elastic band.
I don't remember what band was playing though.
I'm starting a band and we're calling it the 999 Megabytes... We're hoping to get a gig soon...
Heard it from a friend.
In a village just outside Sherwood Forest lived Old Robinhood, he had lived a very exciting life with his band of merry men, and his cause of stealing from the rich and giving to the poor and had a fantastic time doing it. He even had a sign outside his door that said, Robinhood, Bandit - but somehow the law never seemed to have noticed and he had lived in plain sight, doing good deeds, giving away money anonymously and living for the cause.
But now age had started to catch up and not being as nimble as he once was close escapes had started to get uncomfortably close. So he decided to retire and hand over the leadership of his band to his son.
So, Robin called his son over to him and said, βSon, I want you to take over from me as leader of the merry men. Steal and pillage all you want, but never forget the cause - we only take from the rich to give to the poorβ.
βFather, I will do as you sayβ said Robinβs son whose name was Robinson, βbut tell me one thing, why do you stay anonymous when giving money away?
Why not let people know of your good deeds - you have a sign outside that says bandit and youβve never been caught, why not add the cause to the sign and say βRobinhood, Bandit, steals from the rich to give to the poorβ?
βFool, screamed Robin, if you put the cause over the sign then you will get caughtβ
It was a marry Archie band.
Because speed is limited by band width
A horse is sitting at home, watching MTV...
He's watching a heavy metal music video, and the guitarist plays an amazing solo. The horse says "that looks amazing, I want to do that!"
The horse goes to the phone book, looks up a music teacher and calls him. "Hi, I'd like to learn to play guitar." Says the horse.
"Sure," says the man on the phone. "Just come to your lesson and we'll get you started."
"There's just one problem," says the horse. "I'm a horse."
"Not to worry," the man says. "We have new state of the art technology to teach horses. You'll be playing like a pro in no time."
Sure enough, the horse gets really good at the guitar and he can play that amazing solo. He wants to show his friends, so he picks up the phone and calls chicken.
"Hey Chicken, come over!" he says. Chicken comes over, watches horse play the guitar and thinks it's pretty cool. Chicken watches the music video and says "hey, that drum part is pretty cool, I want to learn to play that."
Chicken goes to the phone book, looks up a music teacher and calls him. "Hi, I'd like to learn to play the drums." Says the chicken.
"Sure," says the man on the phone. "Just come to your lesson and we'll get you started."
"There's just one problem," says the chicken. "I'm a chicken."
"Not to worry," the man says. "We have new state of the art technology to teach chickens. You'll be playing like a pro in no time."
Sure enough, the chicken gets really good and begins to jam with the horse. Eventually, they think that something's missing. They watch the video again and realize they need a bass guitarist. They call their friend Cow and show them what they've been up to. Cow thinks it's pretty cool, and wants to learn how to play the bass guitar.
Cow goes to the phone book, looks up a music teacher and calls him. "Hi, I'd like to learn to play bass guitar." Says the cow.
"Sure," says the man on the phone. "Just come to your lesson and we'll get you started."
"There's just one problem," says the cow. "I'm a cow."
"Not to worry," the man says. "We have new state of the art technology to teach cows. You'll be playing like a pro in no time."
Sure enough, the cow gets really good at the bass and the animals have a nice band going.
One day, while they're practicing, a man walks by and hears them. He goes up to the animals and says "hey, you guys are pretty good! I'm from a record label, I'd like to sign you!"
The band records an album, puts out some singles and becomes a massive success.
... keep reading on reddit β‘With a band saw!
I'm looking for band names that involve the word cone (specifically traffic cones). A few examples I have come up with are "The Rolling Cones," "Earth Wind and Cone," and "The Conas Brothers." I'm sure there are lots of good ones that I'm not thinking of.
A band named 1023 MB was very sad, they couldn't get a gig.
This is unoriginal, but it has been reposted so many times i can't even pund it anywhere in the web, I even asked my pet spider where it was orginally found.
Pun 1: >!A gigabyte is actually 1024 MB not 1000 MB!<
Pun 2: >!Spiders makes webs idiot.!<
'Till Lindemann has finished the lyrics.
Explanation: Till Lindemann is the vocalist of the band, they usually have lyrics in their songs so they will have to be finished to be included in the album.
Theyβre the band with Ringo Starrfish, Paul McCalimaritney, Prawn Harrison, and John Lemon Sole.
My favourite is Paul, he plays the sea bass
They called themselves A-Band-On-Ship.
Every year for the past few years, Iβve written music for a tuba ensemble for a summer band camp. Last yearβs music was titled βTubaChristmas in July,β which had βHallelujahβ by Pentatonix, βCarol of the Bells,β βYouβre a Mean One, Mr. Grinch,β and βHave Yourself a Merry TubaChristmas.β This year Iβm about 90% sure weβre doing rock/classic rock. So far I have βBohemian Rhapsodyβ by Queen, βPaint It, Blackβ by The Rolling Stones, βLivinβ on a Prayerβ by Bon Jovi, βDonβt Stop Believinββ by Journey, and some fifth song I havenβt chosen yet (BTW Iβm open to song ideas).
I need a pun that mixes Tuba with Rock or with Classic Rock. Similar to how TubaChristmas in July doesnβt include song names, but you know itβs Christmas music on tubas.
They're calling it Band-Aid.
Would it be a rubber band?
A Rubber Band
I told her that this band would take her on a trip.
I found out I was band
Me:
> I don't know how you find the time to listen to so many bands.
She replied:
> Yeah, I just have a lot of bandwidth.
Normally, I'm the one with the awful puns. I paused, saw her grin, and had to high five her.
This is disconcerting news.
But seriously:
important, my family speaks Spanish
After my school's Christmas concert, I went out to eat with my family. They were asking me about some people who were announced for having made it into the All-State Band and Orchestra, one of which was a string bass player (contrabajo in Spanish).
I told them: "Si... Ella toca contrabajo. (Yes... She plays string bass.)"
And my dad replies: "ΒΏPues si toca con trabajo, porque la aceptaron? (Well if she plays with difficulty, why did they accept her?)"
TL;DR: Contrabajo = string bass, con trabajo = with difficulty
The fattest knight at King Arthurs round table was Sir Cumference. He acquired his size from too much pi.
I thought I saw an eye doctor on an Alaskan island, but it turned out to be an optical Aleutian.
She was only a whiskey maker, but he loved her still.
A rubber band pistol was confiscated from algebra class, because it was a weapon of math disruption.
No matter how much you push the envelope, it'll still be stationery.
A dog gave birth to puppies near the road and was cited for littering.
A grenade thrown into a kitchen in France would result in Linoleum Blownapart.
Two silk worms had a race. They ended up in a tie.
A hole has been found in the nudist camp wall. The police are looking into it.
Time flies like an arrow. Fruit flies like a banana.
Atheism is a non-prophet organization.
Two hats were hanging on a hat rack in the hallway. One hat said to the other: You stay here; I'll go on a head.
I wondered why the baseball kept getting bigger. Then it hit me.
A sign on the lawn at a drug rehab center said: Keep off the Grass.
The midget fortune-teller who escaped from prison was a small medium at large.
The soldier who survived mustard gas and pepper spray is now a seasoned veteran.
A backward poet writes inverse.
In a democracy itβs your vote that counts. In feudalism itβs your count that votes.
When cannibals ate a missionary, they got a taste of religion.
If you jumped off the bridge in Paris, you'd be in Seine.
A vulture boards an airplane, carrying two dead raccoons. The stewardess looks at him and says, Iβm sorry, sir, only one carrion allowed per passenger.
Two fish swim into a concrete wall. One turns to the other and says Dam!
Two Eskimos sitting in a kayak were chilly, so they lit a fire in the craft. Unsurprisingly it sank, proving once again that you canβt have your kayak and heat it too.
Two hydrogen atoms meet. One says, Iβve lost my electron. The other says Are you sure? The first replies, Yes, Iβm positive.
Did you hear about the Buddhist who refused Novocain during a root canal? His goal: transcend dental medication.
There was the person who sent ten puns to friends, with the hope that at least one of the puns would make them laugh. No pun in ten did.
As soon as he comes through the door his wife excitedly tells him "Henry! You would never believe it! The sheep have formed a Jazz band! Isn't that great?!"
Henry, annoyed, replies "I know Mary, I fucking heard them."
They set up equipment for rock bands...
Days That Are Puns
1/23 - January 23rd reads like 123
3/10 - Mar10 Day - Nintendo's Mario Day
3/11 - There's an awesome band called 311
3/14 - 3.14 is the first few digits of Pi AKA Pi Day
5/4 - May the 4th be with you - A pun on "May the force be with you." AKA Star Wars Day
7/11 - Free Slurpee Day at 7 Eleven stores
9/11 - No intention of being offensive with this one. 9/11 reads like the emergency phone number used in the United States
10/4 - Pun for 10-4, which is similar to saying "roger that"
10/23 - National Mole Day (Avogrado's number) 6.02 x 10^23
Please mention any I missed!
Waitress is taking our order.
Dad: I'd like a rubber band sandwich. And make it snappy.
So he invited a band to come in and play a few songs to get the church goers more excited to be there. On the bands first song the entire crowd of people turned around at the exact same time. A little boy asked his father "Daddy, what was that?" The boys dad responded "Well son, that was one direct shun."
Manufacturers are determined to find a band-aid solution.
I went to Lollapalooza last year, and there was an incident. I got into a fight with two of the biggest bands at the fest, and they were really kicking my butt. Fortunately, a few Kurdish doctors intervened and saved my life.
I guess it's true what they say: Styx and The Stones may break my bones, but Kurds will never hurt me.
They call themselves The Band-Aids
Tesla/Edison is that a band? -Yeah AC/DC
Once they have finished mating, the mother roach tries to find a safe place to lay her eggs while the pappa roach tries to support his new family by starting an alt/rock band.
This wasn't his first career choice, but it is his last resort.
I'm not sure why bands are throwing chicken at people nowadays, but I guess at least fans won't go hungry.
I got some Band-"eh"ds.
They're a cover band
Can you guys come up with toilet-based puns for musicians/band names? Like Poo Fighters, Turdy Seconds from Mars, sTool, Pee Diddy, Our Lady Piss, Fart Minor, Michael PooplΓ©. That's all I have for now :D
Dad: What band are you seeing?
Me: Placebo
Dad: ...but how do you know they're the real thing?
I did laugh though, admittedly.
A robber band.
I always bring a can of tuna to my band practices because anytime someone in my band asks for a tuner, I take the can out and say "This is what you asked for, right?"
Hare bands
I'm in the process of getting a show on the local public access channel started. It's going to be a weekly recording studio session that showcases local bands. Most of the paperwork is done, I just need a snappy title. The best I can come up with is "The Here Canal," but I think /r/puns can do better!
My Dad has always been a bit cool (plays in bands, hangs around with much younger guys etc) but at the weekend, on his 67th birthday, he FINALLY Dad joked me.
We were talking about the local rugby team and I said "They're playing a French team. I think it's Toulouse?"
He said "That's not very positive is it? Playing to lose."
"No wait," I said, checking the website, "They're playing Toulon!"
"Ohh, well in that case, it won't be a short game...."
I finally feel like a proper daughter.
The band aid.
Dad: Have you ever heard of the band 1020 MB?
Me: Nope?
Dad: That's because they haven't got a gig yet
It's a cover band.
Itβs a cover band
a rubber band!
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