Just Born Puns

A list of puns related to "Just Born"

Just remembered a classic my brother-in-law dropped after my niece was born (A couple months ago)

My mother FaceTimed me so I could show her my sister and her baby

I went into my sister's room and said, "Hey mom wants to see you. Can you say a quick hello?"

Sister: Sure but just for a minute, I'm exhausted.

BIL, without dropping a beat: Hi exhausted, I'm a new dad!

Old but gold

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👤︎ u/miserablefrosting
📅︎ Apr 28 2021
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My son was just born and another dad at the hospital congratulated me and said his daughter was born yesterday.

He said, "Maybe they'll marry each other?"

"Sure, like my son is going to marry someone twice his age."

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👤︎ u/VERBERD
📅︎ Dec 10 2020
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Why did a father who's son was just born today refused a marriage proposal of a father who's daughter was born just the previous day?

He didn't want his son marrying a girl twice his age.

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👤︎ u/DeathWagon21
📅︎ Apr 02 2021
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We have a joke calendar and we missed this week, my wife was having me guess the answers and we ended up accidentally creating this gem: what do you call a cow that was just born?

A mooborn!

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👤︎ u/Singular1st
📅︎ Sep 24 2020
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Real house cleaners aren’t just born their maid
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👤︎ u/AMswag123
📅︎ Jun 05 2020
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True house cleaners aren't just born...

...they're maid...

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👤︎ u/madazzahatter
📅︎ Apr 23 2020
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My wife just gave birth to our first born, and I noticed hospitals are a lot like hotels

The womb service is great

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👤︎ u/ramichaud
📅︎ Feb 08 2019
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My friend just had three kids! He asked me what to name them. I said ‘James, Charles and Li Zhao’ He asked me why the last one was Li Zhao. So I said ‘Because every 3rd person born in this world is Chinese
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👤︎ u/yeetyboi8787
📅︎ Apr 23 2019
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A 5 year old born with an oven for a heart just had a successful transplant

What a heartwarming story

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👤︎ u/fitemeplz
📅︎ Apr 03 2019
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A man gets to the hospital just as his child is being born...

He was pronounced Dad on Arrival.

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👤︎ u/dylex31
📅︎ Feb 21 2017
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Did you hear about the baby that was just born without eyelids? The made him some with his foreskin after the circumcision

They did a great job, except hes now a bit cockeyed

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👤︎ u/fedloveguns
📅︎ Nov 16 2016
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My son was just born and we named him Cornelius. My mother-in-law responded with "Corny? Seriously?"

Well if I wasn't it would be a bad joke.

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👤︎ u/belly_bell
📅︎ Jul 14 2015
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My grandmother just told me this story; I must have been born a dad.

So I'm driving back from the store with my Grandma just now, and she tells me about this time when we were driving around when I was, in her words, "just a tiny little shit."

Young Me: hey! Look at those geese!

Grandma: Why do you think one side of the V is longer than the other one?

Me: More geese.

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👤︎ u/boschkaa
📅︎ Nov 28 2014
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My son was just born and another dad at the nursery congratulated me and said his daughter was born yesterday… said maybe they'll marry eachother.

Sure, like my son is going to marry someone twice his age...

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👤︎ u/CulturedGrass
📅︎ Jun 24 2019
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My son was just born(!) and another dad at the nursery congratulated me and said his daughter was born yesterday… said maybe they'll marry eachother.

Sure, like my son is going to marry someone twice his age...

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👤︎ u/Nachbar
📅︎ May 31 2018
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True house cleaners aren't just born

They're maid

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👤︎ u/HellsJuggernaut
📅︎ Apr 21 2020
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True house cleaners aren't just born to serve

They're maid to serve.

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👤︎ u/TheAverageAlpha
📅︎ Oct 23 2019
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