I always wanted to name my kid Thustorm, and teach him to play hockey well enough to get him scouted by Boston...

...then I could say "Thustorm's a Bruin."

👍︎ 7
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📅︎ Jun 16 2019
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Pun Request: Facilities Department needs a team name for an office wide Bubble Hockey Team

Any ideas on bringing Office Management and Hockey Terms together for a good team name?

👍︎ 2
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📅︎ May 31 2018
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I want to form a hockey team with a bunch of old men named Gerald...

and call it the "GerryHatTricks."

👍︎ 35
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📅︎ Oct 09 2014
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Dad at a minor league hockey game

Dad and I walk into minor hockey league stadium. He sees the Chuck-A-Puck booth, stops me and say "if we move up to the big leagues they'll change the name to Charles-A-Puck".

My brain couldn't decide if I should laugh or just roll my eyes so I did neither and just stared blankly. It did not phase him.

👍︎ 2
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📅︎ May 14 2015
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Dad nearly gets kids killed using rascist pet names.

My whole family is very, very white.

So my brother and I are at an NHL hockey game. I forget who was playing. My brother and I had gone to get some snacks are where trying to get my dads attention. We called his name, we waved, we screamed, we screeched, and nothing would get his attention. Finally we determined that we get his attention by calling the pet name he used for us when we were getting into mischief.

... 1 ... 2 ... 3 ... COTTONPICKER!!!

At that moment 3 huge black guys turned around. I wondered for a second why they looked like they wanted to murder us. I had never actually parsed the word cottonpicker before; but in the second second I did. Took till the third second until I realized the rascist connotations of that term, and why 3 huge black guys might have some ill will towards us for screaming it so flippantly. I can only imagine how my 13 year old eyes looked as I processed this information. By the forth second I had grabbed my brother and we were running. We didn't stop for 10 minutes. We couldn't go back to our seats for the whole game since these guys were sitting right behind us.

After the game I let my father know how pissed at him I was.

TLDR: Dads don't have rascist pet names for your kids; you may get them killed.

👍︎ 3
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👤︎ u/Gnolaum
📅︎ Mar 09 2014
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