Geminite Puns

https://preview.redd.it/wfi4p5sxq9c51.png?width=2560&format=png&auto=webp&s=04f557c3cf4b6a3a49ae03d0818f50b2405c67de

I have an Affinity for making Inorganic Races appearently. If someone wants a Death Resistant Race or wants to Play as A Steven Universe Gem in their DnD, then this is for them.

(Recently Updated)

http://homebrewery.naturalcrit.com/share/B1WrFo7Umm

[The group all seemed to be in pretty high spirits after dropping off the Sensor without trouble, and knowing the upcoming gym battle was going to be a Water Gym had them feeling hyped up and confident. A bit of play, a bit of exploring, all they had to do was deliver a message this time anyway. … Right?]

Percy:

Yooooo, Honey!

Honey:

Oh no…[Let’s out Sap just in case as she has a feeling as to what the guy wants now.]

Percy:

[Comes rushing up to her with excitement] Glad to see a familiar face. We’ve really been tearing up the place, huh? Foe C and I have been training really hard to make sure we don’t lose to you in our next match.

Foe C:

I’ve gotten a lot bigger too! [Bounces around Honey’s legs before stopping beside Percy obediently] Aren’t I just glamorous with my new speedy and sleek bod~?

Sap:

[Amused] And now Foe C can actually see!

Foe C:

[Still bouncing as he looks the turtle over] That too. But look at you! You’re huge! Bet you wouldn’t stand a chance against my fire power though.

Percy:

[His excitement has faded away as he finds himself just staring at the pair with confusion and concern] Honey… did they… is Foe C… You hear them, right?

Honey:

[Caught off guard again. She REALLY needs to warn people about that. Pulls out the PokeComm.] Oh! You can hear them too? Yeah! While I was running errands, the INVENTOR gave me this for helping him.

Percy:

[Takes the device as she explains, his eyes alight with jealousy and wonder as he looks to the pair of Pokemon still in friendly chatter] So you’ve got your very own Pokemon translator? That’s so badass~! You’re like one of those magical girls on T.V. now.

Honey:

[Feels herself start to blush deeply at the comment as she shies away. She sure was “magical” alright, but not in anyway she wanted to go on discussing with him. Nervously tries to joke] Well, you know me. Simple errand girl off to secretly fight crime and explore ruins. [Sap is looking over at them with concern] Um… but what about you? You guys off to Stormy City?

Percy:

Nah, we’re not that good yet. Mostly we’ve been training while waiting for the bridge to open again. I hoped when you showed up, it meant I could finally get back to Seaspray Town and we could challenge Flo. Say! Why don’t we have a practice round to see if we’re ready?

Honey:

Oh, but Percy, I don’t really have ti- [*Ah, what was the use, he wasn’t going to listen to her anyway.

I don't want to step on anybody's toes here, but the amount of non-dad jokes here in this subreddit really annoys me. First of all, dad jokes CAN be NSFW, it clearly says so in the sub rules. Secondly, it doesn't automatically make it a dad joke if it's from a conversation between you and your child. Most importantly, the jokes that your CHILDREN tell YOU are not dad jokes. The point of a dad joke is that it's so cheesy only a dad who's trying to be funny would make such a joke. That's it. They are stupid plays on words, lame puns and so on. There has to be a clever pun or wordplay for it to be considered a dad joke.

Again, to all the fellow dads, I apologise if I'm sounding too harsh. But I just needed to get it off my chest.

The nurse asked the rabbit, “what is your blood type?”

“I am probably a type O” said the rabbit.

The doctor says it terminal.

Alot of great jokes get posted here! However just because you have a joke, doesn't mean it's a dad joke.

THIS IS NOT ABOUT NSFW, THIS IS ABOUT LONG JOKES, BLONDE JOKES, SEXUAL JOKES, KNOCK KNOCK JOKES, POLITICAL JOKES, ETC BEING POSTED IN A DAD JOKE SUB

Try telling these sexual jokes that get posted here, to your kid and see how your spouse likes it.. if that goes well, Try telling one of your friends kid about your sex life being like Coca cola, first it was normal, than light and now zero , and see if the parents are OK with you telling their kid the "dad joke"

I'm not even referencing the NSFW, I'm saying Dad jokes are corny, and sometimes painful, not sexual

So check out r/jokes for all types of jokes

r/unclejokes for dirty jokes

r/3amjokes for real weird and alot of OC

r/cleandadjokes If your really sick of seeing not dad jokes in r/dadjokes

Punchline !

Edit: this is not a post about NSFW , This is about jokes, knock knock jokes, blonde jokes, political jokes etc being posted in a dad joke sub

Edit 2: don't touch the thermostat

Do your worst!

How the hell am I suppose to know when it’s raining in Sweden?

Mathematical puns makes me number

We told her she can lean on us for support. Although, we are going to have to change her driver's license, her height is going down by a foot. I don't want to go too far out on a limb here but it better not be a hack job.

Ants don’t even have the concept fathers, let alone a good dad joke. Keep r/ants out of my r/dadjokes.

But no, seriously. I understand rule 7 is great to have intelligent discussion, but sometimes it feels like 1 in 10 posts here is someone getting upset about the jokes on this sub. Let the mods deal with it, they regulate the sub.

They were cooked in Greece.

I'm surprised it hasn't decade.

He lost May

Now that I listen to albums, I hardly ever leave the house.

Don't you know a good pun is its own reword?

Two muffins are in an oven, one muffin looks at the other and says "is it just me, or is it hot in here?"

Then the other muffin says "AHH, TALKING MUFFIN!!!"

Said if she ever hosts a gender reveal party, when it comes time to pop the balloon she'll spray everyone with water.

Gender is fluid.

For context I'm a Refuse Driver (Garbage man) & today I was on food waste. After I'd tipped I was checking the wagon for any defects when I spotted a lone pea balanced on the lifts.

I said "hey look, an escaPEA"

No one near me but it didn't half make me laugh for a good hour or so!

Edit: I can't believe how much this has blown up. Thank you everyone I've had a blast reading through the replies 😂

It really does, I swear!

And now I’m cannelloni

Because she wanted to see the task manager.

But that’s comparing apples to oranges

And boy are my arms legs.

Amy

Put it on my bill

Heard they've been doing some shady business.

but then I remembered it was ground this morning.

Edit: Thank you guys for the awards, they're much nicer than the cardboard sleeve I've been using and reassures me that my jokes aren't stale

Edit 2: I have already been made aware that Men In Black 3 has told a version of this joke before. If the joke is not new to you, please enjoy any of the single origin puns in the comments

BamBOO!

They’re on standbi

A play on words.

Calcium, nickel, neon