What is Gods surname?

Zilla

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πŸ‘€︎ u/OGRedEyez
πŸ“…︎ Jan 07 2023
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What's the opposite of a wet thunder lizard?

A drynosaur!

Nobody in my house thought this was funny the first time. Or the twenty third time.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/benthemad1
πŸ“…︎ Jan 14 2023
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What happens if someone slaps you at a high frequency?

It hertz

πŸ‘︎ 173
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Mommyof4Kings
πŸ“…︎ Sep 09 2022
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why are LGBT+ people poor comedians?

They can't say anything with a straight face

πŸ‘︎ 2k
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πŸ“…︎ Apr 20 2022
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What happens when you spank Dwayne Johnson's ass

You hit rock bottom!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Hybrid_Skills
πŸ“…︎ Aug 31 2022
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everyone has different musical tastes

To each their tone

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πŸ‘€︎ u/flyzguy
πŸ“…︎ Aug 11 2022
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My wife gave me an ultimatum. It was either her or my addiction to sweets.

The decision was a piece of cake.

πŸ‘︎ 11k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/LordCinko
πŸ“…︎ Jan 31 2021
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The Blitz of Puns

It really grinds my gears when people say stick-shift is obsolete.

Most people like their music bass-boosted, but it seems like too much treble.

When an astronaut drinks tea, he takes a big space-sip.

The best electricity puns are live wires. Coppers really don’t know how to resist these in a coil. If you make enough of this type of pun you can really blow their fuses. You need to be smart about how you conduct these so you don’t overload your capacitors.

The only kind of rap I like is the wrapping paper on gifts.

Scissors always cut to the point.

Airplane puns always fly overhead. You have to be careful so you don’t stall out. Always use better judgement so you nose how to dive. When used correctly, this pun classification can really propel to infinity and beyond. However, if misused, the fall from grace is full of turbulence.

When working with electricity puns always make sure to be grounded to prevent shocking results.

Mr. Tea says, ”Don’t be a fool, stay in school!”

i c e i c e w a t e r

Architecture is an aspiring career path.

β€˜Pun’ puns don’t add up. The are starting to get negative receptions.

I’ll do algebra. I’ll even do calculus. But graphing is where I draw the line.

Plants should always rooted in the ground.

Never argue with people when they are right or nobody will be left hanging out with you.

Rocks make boulder moves. This means they are pelite and not jagged. Don’t take these puns for granite.

Cheese puns are grate because you don’t have to ask for parmesan to use them.

Eskimos have cold personality. It is an ice society, but some of their history chills my spine.

My dog died a few years ago. It was really ruff.

I am not a fan of wind turbines.

Life is like driftwood. You never know where you will float.

Christmas lights stick together. When one goes out, they all do.

Puns about communism are only funny if everyone gets them.

Rocket scientists cannot fuel around or something bad can happen.

A baker is someone who kneads to make baked goods.

I sometimes wear stripes to avoid being spotted.

Sponges are great at absorbing liquids.

Contrary to the name, relationships have nothing to do with boats.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/zmanofdoom95
πŸ“…︎ May 16 2019
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What's a Leprechauns favorite type of music?

Me: Sham-Rock and Roll. My Dad: That's so funny it has be Dublin over with laughter.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/ZigZachGamer
πŸ“…︎ Mar 17 2018
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Why is there music coming from that rock?

Out with my daughter at a resort, we heard music coming from a speaker shaped to look like a rock. She asked me why they had music coming from a rock. I told her the truth: it's rock music.

"Dad," she replied, "you're funny."

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πŸ‘€︎ u/dedtired
πŸ“…︎ Sep 16 2015
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