More and more people are sticking cheese on the tips of their fingers. Jane, who puts Camembert on her index finger, is a casein point.
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πŸ“…︎ Sep 09 2019
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My friend told me this long story on how he lost the tip of his index finger in an accident.

It was a bit pointless.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ May 29 2019
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Knowing the measurement from the tip of your thumb to the tip of your pinky finger is pretty handy.
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πŸ‘€︎ u/-Kfrey
πŸ“…︎ Apr 18 2019
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My dad texted me this while I was at the emergency room after chopping the tip off of my finger.

I had cooked smoked sauasge and was chopping jalapeΓ±os and cut the tip off my finger.

He texted me while at the emergency room commenting on the sausages:

"The sausages are really good but there is something different about them and I can't quite put my finger on it"

He followed up with this when my girlfriend and I returned from the hospital:

"Elizabeth are you hungry? We have some finger sandwiches if you are."

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Firm_as_red_clay
πŸ“…︎ Aug 09 2016
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My 3 yr old son didn't realize it but he told me a good dadjoke

As I'm holding my son, he begins to pretend his hands are spiders and starts wiggling the tips of his fingers on my arm and then says

"These spiders are crawling on you because they're Daddy Long Legs"

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πŸ‘€︎ u/plzinsertgirder
πŸ“…︎ Aug 05 2015
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Got the ER nurse and receptionist while being treated.

I sliced the tip of my finger off on a kitchen mandolin and after much convincing from my wife we went to the ER.

Nurse: Sorry for the long wait and thank you for your patience.

Me: This patient's got patience, so no worries.

Wife, nurse and receptionist: groans

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πŸ‘€︎ u/shifty21
πŸ“…︎ Apr 06 2015
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