I used a performance enhancer in the bedroom with my wife last night.

I wore a blindfold.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/VERBERD
πŸ“…︎ Jan 17 2021
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Apparently 'Viagra' is now available in powder form specially for tea. Well, it's not for enhancing your sexual libido................

.............. But it won't let your dipped biscuit 'Go Soft'

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πŸ‘€︎ u/ball5deeper
πŸ“…︎ Jul 15 2020
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If prosthetic enhancements become mainstream

I'm going to have an abacus installed on the top of my head so I can be a guy people can really count on!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/ppardee
πŸ“…︎ Jul 07 2020
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Did you hear about the professional skier who started to use performance enhancing drugs?

He went downhill real fast.

πŸ‘︎ 32
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πŸ‘€︎ u/RicoCat
πŸ“…︎ Nov 14 2019
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Why blurry criminal images get sent to Asia to zoom and enhance?

Because InterpolAsian

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πŸ‘€︎ u/MogolianShrimp
πŸ“…︎ May 01 2019
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Apparently, gluing books to your ceiling is a good way to enhance your learning.

I've been reading up.

πŸ‘︎ 26
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πŸ‘€︎ u/TommehBoi
πŸ“…︎ Sep 15 2018
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Male enhancement pills...

..are they real, or just another phallusy?

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Tehrasha
πŸ“…︎ Mar 12 2017
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Measuring the speed of bugs is a great way to enhance any enjoyable experience. If you don't believe me...

Time flies when you're having fun.

πŸ‘︎ 9
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πŸ‘€︎ u/zer01201
πŸ“…︎ Oct 24 2016
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"If you really want to impress your lady friend, then you need to give your package a little enhancement..." youtube.com/watch?v=a0rtp…
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πŸ‘€︎ u/quazzet
πŸ“…︎ Nov 25 2014
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My grandpa's "triple pun"

This joke holds a special place in my heart. My grandpa told me it and I never forgot it. About 2 years later when I brought it up to him, he didn't remember it. So I told him the joke and he peed himself laughing ... At his own joke.

"Why did the man ask for his eggs Benedict to be served on a hubcap?"

"Because there's no plate like chrome for the hollandaise"

πŸ‘︎ 168
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πŸ‘€︎ u/JAM3SBND
πŸ“…︎ Apr 17 2019
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From an ask reddit thread imgur.com/MEZJ4R0
πŸ‘︎ 4k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Pricers
πŸ“…︎ Oct 17 2013
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Why does everyone apply salt to their meals?

It’s sodium good

πŸ‘︎ 35
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πŸ‘€︎ u/MasterDoot
πŸ“…︎ Sep 24 2018
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Aladdin banned from flying carpet racing! Sources say…

…for use of performance enhancing rugs…

πŸ‘︎ 8
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πŸ‘€︎ u/honolulu_oahu_mod
πŸ“…︎ Oct 21 2019
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The guy at the music store got me.

I discovered that I can buy a piece of musical equipment that will enhance my playing, so I went to buy one.

Me: I didn't realize that these existed until two days ago.

Clerk: Oh no, they still exist today.

πŸ‘︎ 1k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/FreeBroccoli
πŸ“…︎ May 22 2015
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What do a octopus and a human have in common?

They are both fairly dumb compared to the ultimately attainable intelligence of a biological organism given the use of cognitive enhancement utilizing vast computational resources.

(Yea that’s the joke, this is my first day on the job and I’m trying to impress the boss.) what am I saying

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πŸ‘€︎ u/hisairnessag
πŸ“…︎ Jun 09 2019
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Al Gore

Dad: Everyone knows Al Gore invented the internet, but did you know he also discovered internet rhythms that enhance searches? Son: No. Dad: Yep, they're called Al Gore Rhythms.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Jimbok5033
πŸ“…︎ Jun 13 2018
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My dad's response when I told him "Leave me alone, I'm on edge"

"Weird, I have 4G"

πŸ‘︎ 39
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πŸ‘€︎ u/_Tys1_
πŸ“…︎ Feb 11 2014
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This happened about 15 years ago but it still makes me laugh, thanks Dad...

When I was about 5/6 I was filling out one of those "FunFax" books (Image for reference).

I started filling out the page about me and I got to the section on allergies. Unaware that I had any, I asked my dad "Do I have any allergies?"

My Dad replied "Yeah, soap"

Obviously at the age of 5/6 I didn't realise he was joking, we found the book a few years later to find I actually wrote "Soap" down.

πŸ‘︎ 7
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πŸ‘€︎ u/joebell93
πŸ“…︎ Mar 07 2014
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A colleague was asking about Laxatives at lunch

I said Laxatives? You mean Pooformance Enhancing Drugs?

πŸ‘︎ 13
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Deadpoodle
πŸ“…︎ Mar 16 2015
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Lost all my numbers

http://s3-ec.buzzfed.com/static/2013-11/enhanced/webdr05/19/15/enhanced-buzz-11118-1384891457-13.jpg

πŸ‘︎ 23
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πŸ‘€︎ u/gufoozi14
πŸ“…︎ Jan 12 2014
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