Earnings Call Puns

Gross revenue

Income-plete.

could I call it a Moscow Mitch?

Explanation: A cocktail called a Moscow Mule is served in copper mugs. The mint julep is Kentucky Derby's official drink, and Mitch McConnell is the senator from Kentucky who has blocked legislation to stop Russian interference in US elections, earning him the nickname "Moscow Mitch" among his critics.

Has earned the right to be called an expert in underwear sales

My professor and I were emailing about the final project I had recently submitted when I decided to take the time to thank her for being so helpful. Professors that make classes easier to understand and add a little humor to their lectures deserve all the praise in the world, and mine was no exception to that. This was also my first class that wasn't a general education course, starting me on an MIS degree.

I emailed her saying something along the lines of,

"Thanks for being so helpful throughout the semester, this was my first MIS class and you really gave me the confidence I needed in knowing I was doing it right."

I followed with "Thanks for making this class so interesting, I will be transferring to (insert new college here) to continue earning my MIS degree. I think it's safe to say you influenced my decision to a certain degree. Hah! Certain degree, get it?"

She called me over after next lecture to tell me how bad my pun was while groaning and chuckling. No regrets.