A list of puns related to "Dog Paws"
"woof" guy replies
The ruler is saying 2 inches but my eyes are saying it's a foot.
Microwaved hot dog
Hairy pupper and the half-blued prints.
The woof
and he did so on our dog’s paws
Three roommates, a human, a monkey and a dog are watching Netflix when the human and monkey start laughing. The dog rolls his eyes and says “That joke is getting old.” The monkey then says “Hey, do you want to press play next time?” The human almost chokes on his soda as he starts laughing hysterically. The dog gets up and goes to his room. As he walks off, he turns and with a single tear forming, and his voice quivering he blurts out “You both know I only have paws!”
There was a 3 legged dog. After a long journey,the dog walks into a small mining town in the desert. In the town, there's a saloon, the type with the swinging doors.The dog walks through and stands in the entrance, everyone stops what they are doing and the saloon goes quiet...
The dog stares down the place and says,
"I'm Looking for the man who shot my Paw."
My wife just finished eating some eggo waffles and the dog came in and immediately started licking the syrup off her hands
Her: the dog didn't even see me eat yet he ran straight over to me and began licking my hands.
Me: Yeah, it's like he nose
Her (trying to come up with something to out do my joke): That was quite the paw-n
Me: Was that supposed to be a joke, because it sounded like a faux-paw
So I used to play a lot of video games with my Dad (goldeneye mostly) and if he would ever have to step away it'd usually go like this:
Dad: Put the game on dog's feet.
Me: look of confusion
Dad: Paws (Pause)
The funniest and shortest puns for kids, you always remember while teaching children puns, try to choose the short ones because they are easy for them to remember and register.
Why are teddy bears never hungry? They are always stuffed!
What do you get when you cross a snake and a pie? A pie-thon!
Where do polar bears vote? The North Poll.
What did the judge say when the skunk walked into the court room? Odor in the court!
Two silkworms had a race. They ended up in a tie.
Why are fish so smart? Because they live in schools.
The streets in the capital of Afghanistan are paved with Kabulstones.
How does a lion greet the other animals in the field? Pleased to eat you.
What do you get when a chicken lays an egg on top of a barn? An egg roll!
No matter how much you push the envelope, it will still be stationery.
Why did the turkey cross the road? To prove he wasn’t chicken!
What musical is about a train conductor? “My Fare, Lady”.
A man drowned in a bowl of muesli. A strong currant pulled him in.
What do you get from a pampered cow? Spoiled milk.
What animals are on legal documents? Seals!
Why did the lion spit out the clown? Because he tasted funny!
Why did the bumble bee leave the house? It heard the school was having a spelling bee.
Being struck by lightning is really a shocking experience!
How do celebrities stay cool? They have many fans!
Why do fish live in salt water? Because pepper makes them sneeze!
Dockyard: A physician’s garden.
What did the angry mother say to the boiling pot of spaghetti? Simmer down!
The lights were too bright at the Chinese restaurant so the manager decided to dim sum.
“What’s purple and 5000 miles long?” “Ooh! I know! The Grape Wall of China!”
Every calendar’s days are numbered.
This duck walks into a bar and orders a beer. “Four bucks,” says the bartender. “Put it on my bill.”
I used to be twins. My mother has a picture of me when I was two.
What sound do porcupines make when they kiss? Ouch!
When does a well-dressed lion look like a weed? When he’s a dandelion (dandy lion).
Two peanuts walk into a bar, and one was a-salted.
A bicycle can’t stand on its own because it is
... keep reading on reddit ➡Dad: "Yeah, the dog can even use the TV remote, it has a paws button."
What did the termite say when he walked into a saloon?
"where is the bar tender? "
What did the three legged dog say when he went into the bar?
" I'm looking for the man who shot my paw. "
Edit: hit not git in the title. Too fat of fingers for my phone...
So I'm getting a tattoo done of my dog's paw print and his name.
I messaged my dad telling him it's today and he replies back with.
"Paws to consider what you're about to do."
I audibly groaned
My roommate is thinking of getting a dog.
"I don't know, they're so much work. It really gives me paws."
A mushroom walking into a bar and the bartender says, "I'm sorry we don't serve your kind around here." And the mushroom says, "Oh come on, I'm a fungi."
A three legged dog walks into a bar and the bartender says, "Can I get you something?" and the dog says, "No, I'm lookin' for the man who shot my paw."
A piece of string walks into a bar and the bartender says, "Hey, we don't serve your kind around here." So the string walks outside twists himself into a loop, messes up his hair and walks back in. The bartender spots him and says, "Hey! Arn't you the piece of string that just walked in here?" And the string looks at him and says, "Nope, I'm a frayed knot."
My sister was holding my injured dogs paw and said to our dad: "dad we should really get his paw looked at" My dad respobded: "I would but I don't even know his dad"
Flatmate: Ah! Ronald [the dog] gets so smelly after he sweats! I didn't even know dogs had pores! I thought they sweat by panting or something!
Me: What are you talking about!? Their paws are on the bottom of their legs!
heavy groaning by everyone in the room
A three-legged dog walks into a bar and says to the bartender, I'm looking for the man who shot my paw
And says, "I'm lookin for the man who shot my paw."
Bar tender says "we don't serve dogs in this bar"
Dog replies "I'm looking for the man who shot my paw"
The bar tender looks a him and says "who are you looking for?" to which the dog replies "I'm looking for the guy who shot my paw".
A three legged dog walks into a bar and says, "I'm lookin' for the man who shot my paw!"
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