Why did a man name his dogs Rolex and Timex?
Because they were Watch Dogs.
ποΈ 13
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οΈ Jan 03 2021
Outside of a dog, a book is man's best friend. Inside of a dog it's too dark to read.
ποΈ 26
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οΈ Dec 08 2020
A man walks into a zoo. The only animal in the entire zoo is a dog.
....
It was a shitzu.
EDIT: For those who say it's "stolen", i had no idea. A friend of mine told me this one yesterday and i just had to post it. That's it :)
ποΈ 16k
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οΈ Jul 06 2020
Whatβs the difference between a well dressed man and a tired out dog?
One wears a suit and the other just pants.
ποΈ 18
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οΈ Dec 12 2020
A man goes into a library and asks for a book about Pavlov's dogs and Schrodinger's cat.
The librarian says, "It rings a bell, but I don't know whether it's there or not."
ποΈ 440
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οΈ May 16 2020
Dog Man don't like tuna
ποΈ 8
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οΈ Jun 01 2020
What did the man say to the rabid dog in the street?
ποΈ 4
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οΈ Jun 13 2020
A blind man walks into a store with his seeing eye dog, bends down as if to pet it, then picks it up by the tail and begins spinning it over his head. It created quite the ruckus, so an employee ran over and asked the man if he needed help.
"No thanks, just looking around."
ποΈ 6
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οΈ Apr 16 2020
What did the man do when he saw a hot dog?
ποΈ 4
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οΈ Apr 26 2020
I told my wife that a dog is a mans best friend
"Shame you don't have any friends" she said
ποΈ 3
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οΈ Apr 19 2020
A blind man walks into a bar with his guide dog.
Then he starts spinning his leashed dog around himself.
The bartender asks him what the Hell is he doing, and the blind man goes:
"Just looking around..."
ποΈ 15
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οΈ Feb 03 2020
A man is walking his dogs and another guy asks βexcuse me are they Jack Russels?β
The owner quickly replies, βNo, theyβre mine!β
ποΈ 6
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οΈ Feb 16 2020
What did the Chinese man love to do with his dog?
ποΈ 2
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οΈ Mar 05 2020
A man brings his Rottweiler into the vet. βMy dog is cross-eyed is there anything you can do for him?β
βWell,β the vet says, βLetβs have a look at him.β The vet picks up the dog and looks into his eyes.
After a few second the he says, βIβm afraid Iβm going to have to put him down.β
The shocked owner replies, βwhat?! Because heβs cross-eyed?!β
βNo, because heβs heavy.β
ποΈ 461
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οΈ Feb 26 2019
A three-legged dog walks into a bar and says to the bartender, "Iβm looking for the man who shot my paw."
ποΈ 2
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οΈ Oct 19 2019
Was walking my dogs the other day and some man asked me, βare those Jack Russells?β
I said, βNo, theyβre mineβ
ποΈ 3
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οΈ Nov 07 2019
One day a man asked a dog. How do you communicate with other dogs?
ποΈ 6
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οΈ Sep 11 2019
A man went to buy a dog and asked the shopkeeper how loyal it was
He said, "I sold him 6 times and he came back to me"
ποΈ 5
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οΈ Sep 18 2019
When the old man gives a dog a bone...
ποΈ 7
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οΈ Apr 19 2019
Bouncer: "Sorry, pal, no pets allowed." Man: "This is my Seeing-Eye dog." Bouncer: "A Chihuahua?"
Man: "A Chihuahua? They gave me
a freaking Chihuahua?"
ποΈ 5
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οΈ Aug 01 2019
A police officer told me that my dog was chasing a man on a bicycle. I told him thatβs impossible.
ποΈ 23
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οΈ May 22 2018
My dad and I were walking down the street when we passed a man walking 4 dogs.
He turned to me and said, βWhoa! How blind was that guy?β
ποΈ 26
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οΈ Jun 30 2018
Earlier today a man broke into and released all the dogs from a dogs home
Police are desperately looking for leads.
ποΈ 31
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οΈ Jan 27 2018
A jogger sees a man in the park throwing his dog's toy in the trash. He stops and asks the man why he's doing this. The man says, "The ball has a picture of a dog printed on it." The jogger, still confused, asks what's wrong with that?
The man replies, "Something about it feels wrong, dude. It just feels like CanineBallism."
ποΈ 2
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οΈ Apr 25 2018
Why did the man hate Hot Dogs?
Because they are the wurst
ποΈ 35
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οΈ Feb 28 2017
This man approached me in the park. He said, 'Have you seen my dog anywhere?'
Who on earth calls their dog Anywhere?
ποΈ 7
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οΈ Aug 25 2018
If you want to prove that dog is truly mans best friend
Lock up your dog and wife in the boot of your car for an hour and see who's happiest to see you when you let them out
ποΈ 7
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οΈ Jul 15 2018
A man walks into a zoo. It only has one dog
ποΈ 19
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οΈ Aug 07 2020
Outside of a dog, a manβs best friend is a book.
Inside of a dog, itβs too dark to read.
ποΈ 7
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οΈ Jun 08 2020
A man walks into a zoo and the only animal there is a dog.
ποΈ 49
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οΈ May 06 2020
A man walked into a zoo but the only animal they had was a dog.
ποΈ 8
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οΈ Apr 29 2020
Why did the man name his dogs Rolex, and Timex?
Because they were watch dogs.
ποΈ 20
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οΈ Feb 17 2020
What does a dog do, that a man steps into?
ποΈ 5
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οΈ Apr 28 2020
Outside of a dog a book is mans best friend
Inside a dog itβs too dark to read.
ποΈ 26
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οΈ Dec 21 2019
A man walks into a zoo. The only animal in the entire zoo is a dog.
ποΈ 6k
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οΈ Sep 15 2017
A man walks into a zoo and the only animal there is a dog,
ποΈ 4
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οΈ Nov 28 2019
A man goes to a zoo, but the only animal in the entire zoo is a dog.
ποΈ 4k
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οΈ Nov 28 2016
A three-legged dog walks into a bar and says to the bartender, "Iβm looking for the man who shot my paw."
ποΈ 4
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οΈ Oct 10 2019
A man went to the zoo today and all they had was a dog.
ποΈ 365
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οΈ Aug 07 2018
Outside of a dog, a book is manβs best friend. Inside of a dog, itβs too dark to read.
ποΈ 5
π
οΈ Oct 05 2019
Why did the man name his dogs Rolex and Timex?
Because they were watch dogs
ποΈ 10
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οΈ Jul 23 2019
A man walks into a zoo and there is only one animal in the entire zoo, a dog.
ποΈ 195
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οΈ May 12 2018
A man walks into a zoo. The only animal in the entire zoo is a dog
ποΈ 50
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οΈ Jun 09 2018
A man walks into a zoo. There is only one animal in there, and it is a dog.
ποΈ 21
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οΈ Aug 03 2018
A man walks into a zoo. The only animal in the zoo is a dog..
ποΈ 27
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οΈ Oct 05 2018
A man went to a zoo. All they had to exhibit was a dog.
ποΈ 10
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οΈ May 24 2018
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