Me and my husband got married a week ago. Not everything went quite as we planned. The reason is my brother in law (Jack 21) he's the youngest in the family. Extremely well cared for and everyone spoils him all the time.
For some reason he doesn't like me. Always been passive-aggressive towards me and made awful remarks about me on several occasions. Jack has a German Shepard, a really big boy that he adores and takes everywhere. I gotta say his dog is very active and quite big.
He wanted us to include his dog in the wedding invitation we sent him. His mom told me that. I told her that he can't bring his dog and she acted confused asking why. Then said Jack and his dog always attend events together. And that Jack didn't appreciate how disrespectful I was towards his dog. I have no hate for dogs I have a chihuahua that I got 3 years ago. But even she (bless her) can not be around Jack's moody dog.
I insisted no dogs allowed and it caused some disagreements but I thought we had them solved. At the wedding. Jack showed up with his dog and wearing a t-shirt with the words "dog dad" on it. I was shocked whrn I saw them, He sat his dog at the table my family was sitting at. Mother in law was smiling widely. His dog was running around ruining everything. Causing loud noise and making guests uncomfortable I swear and I'm not exaggerating some of my dearest nearest friends were leaving. I had enough after all people were feeling terrified/uneasy with the dog's acting out.
I told Jack he needed to take his dog elsewhere so someone else can stay with him. Jack refused and argued with me so I told him to leave. Mother in law kept calling me unreasonable for telling her son to leave. She said I was the one ruining my own wedding and I needed to calm down and let Jack enjoy his brother's wedding. My husband stood there. Hands in his pockets saying he should've eloped if that's how everyone was behaving at the wedding.
I put my foot down and asked him to leave. He kept arguing with me but then took his dog and left. The family were upset saying I shouldn't have taken away Jack's excitement to share his brother's joy on his big day. His mother was extremely agitated and said I overreacted. That I just made it personal and was acting like a bridezilla kicking out an innocent dog and her son of the wedding. I already made it clear but Jack was being mean trying to go against my wishes but still I'm the one at fault for kicking him out instead of figuring out a solution
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My mother-in-law “Mary” and her husband “Andy” are wonderful people, and I am so lucky to have a MIL that I get along with very well. They have a dog, “Max”, who is cute but a terror. He is poorly disciplined and does whatever he wants.
Max does two things that really bother me: scratches my legs and pulls on my clothing. Whenever I sit down, he immediately starts scratching my legs hard. Mary tries to get him to stop by giving him a treat or a toy, but she can only distract him for a few minutes before he comes back to it. They don’t trim his nails, so it always leads to my legs bleeding. After a few visits of this I thought I’d be smart and wear long pants so he couldn’t scratch me, but instead he started grabbing my pants leg in his teeth and yanking. He’s ripped two pairs of my pants because he does this. I’ve tried to make it stop, to no avail.
I don’t want to cause issues so I haven’t told Mary how much it bothers me, but my husband knows that I’m really upset. The last time we went over, Max ripped my jeans and somehow managed to also get my shirt in his teeth and ripped that too. Frankly I’m fed up.
I cannot go over there anymore. I just can’t deal with that dog scratching me. She can come to our house, we can go out to dinner, anything besides going to their house.
WIBTA if I stop visiting my mother-in-law because I cannot handle being attacked by her dog anymore?
Really torn in if I’m the AH here. I have a toddler and a newborn, and this issue goes back to when my toddler was born.
My in-laws have a shelter dog. We think he was abused based on his behavior — very unpredictable, cowers, freak outs. Typically he’s a fine dog, but I just didn’t feel comfortable with him around my toddler. This dog jumps a TON and nipped at his feet whenever in-laws held him.
SO and I decided that we’d just invite them to our home instead of visiting them because of this. They took huge offense that we wouldn’t come over (despite being welcome at our house) and insisted they’d never let anything happen to the baby. I drew a line in the sand and said that we wouldn’t be visiting if their dog was loose. They agreed, but sure enough, as soon as the dog started whining, they’d let him out of the other room and it was just a nightmare. When they realized we’d just leave, they made my BIL sit with the dog in another room and it was a point of contention.
This has come up again now that we have another baby. I understand that the dog lives there, not us. And I would never presume to tell someone else how to live. But I think that just having them visit us was a perfect solution, which they refused.
So, AITA if I once again refuse to go over there unless they contain the dog? They are still welcome to visit us.
My sister in law (natalie,) got a dog years ago before I got married and one day decided it was too much work for her with the kids so she asked my other sister and brother in law to temporarily take care of it for her. They keep the dog outside just like she did and she would go drop of a large bag of dog food at their house every few weeks until eventually, she stopped dropping off the food and stopped talking about taking the dog back without actually saying she wanted them to keep it permanently.
Fast forward to now: My husband and I live in another state. Our next-door neighbor’s dog had puppies and we bought one from her. Every time I send or post a picture my sister in law went crazy talking about how cute it was. Yesterday we found out that one of the people that took another Puppy from the litter had to back out and won’t be able to keep it because of medical issues. My neighbor posted that the puppy needed a new home and my husband sent a screenshot to the group chat.
Natalie immediately started asking how much and if we could take care of it for her and bring it out when we go visit (1 month from now). I told my husband that she would get the dog over my dead body and that she should go pick up her abandoned dog before thinking about buying a new one because she has puppy fever.
I then went out of my way to find someone else to adopt the puppy. My husband says that I went to far. AITA?
Update: I just wanted to thank everyone for your support! You guys have made me feel much better and I’ll definitely be showing my husband that I was right (Hahha just kidding... mostly). Im sure you all agree that it’s amazing to see that at least for every bad pet owner there’s 100 animal lovers that want a good life and a good home for them.
Several years ago, my partner and I decided it was time to get a dog. He'd had dogs his entire life, this would be my first. Right about the time we started looking, a friend posted about fostering a litter of labrador mix puppies for a local rescue. We applied, went through the interview process, and were approved to adopt a little meatball of a puppy, once it was old enough. One of the documents we had to sign for the adoption included a clause stating if we couldn't take care of the dog, we agreed to surrender it back to the rescue.
We sent a picture of our new addition out on the family group chat, and immediately my partners mother started asking questions. His parents are "keeping up with the Joneses" type people, so we had already anticipated them trying to get a dog. I honestly didn't believe they'd pass the adoption process, but low and behold, we ended up picking our puppies up the same day.
Fast forward to a few years later - our dog is a healthy member of our family. Regular walks, good food, another puppy brother to play with that we adopted a year later. My in laws dog is well loved, but they are a bit older, so the dog doesn't get walked, doesn't have a yard to play in, and only gets interaction if it can be done from a seat on the couch. He's overweight and has some health problems. A few of the problems are genetic, but some of them could probably be improved with some regular activity.
Recently, my MIL mentioned it may be their dogs "time". His health problems aren't getting worse, but they aren't improving, and my in laws don't seem to have any interest in treating them. I suggested getting a dog walker (we'd pay), but that got shot down. After it sounded like they were serious about having the dog put down for what seemed like a manageable condition, I asked about the adoption contract. My MIL said they had the same return clause, but that there was no way to enforce it, and that it would be embarrassing to return the dog.
Here's where I may be TA: I called the rescue. They made contact, and after what my FIL calls bullying, they agreed to surrender the dog back to the rescue. My understanding from a friend is that the dog started improving almost immediately with a new family.
My in laws are furious that I intervened, saying it was none of my business and that I embarrassed them by saying they couldn't take care of their own dog. They aren't speaking to me. My partner isn't necessarily mad, but did say I should have just left
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"Because you're using his plate."
Larger dog breeds, even ones considered to have mild or good temperaments are vilified, often regulated against and there is a stigma related to some breeds, especially bull breeds.
If you have a bull breed and you have ANY type of bite event even if the dog is legitimately protecting its family or defending itself there's a good chance your dog is gonna be dead after a police review or labeled as an aggressive animal which could impact whether or not you might have to choose to get rid of your dog or move etc.
Over the years the reality is the nastiness and image surrounding especially the Bull Breeds was primarily a result of the owner and handler and not because the breed itself is dangerous. The perception of them being "A loaded gun" is far far off from reality.
Some small dog breeds (looking at you chihuahuas) are reactionary and are evil to the depths of their souls. They bite far more often, are usually untrained in regard to their negative temperament, are very often owned by people who use them as decoration instead of a companion and you'll see in social media and other platforms that the nastiness and anger of the breed is seen as cute an fun and it's even encouraged a lot of the time.
If a larger dog bites you is it a more serious injury? Yes. This isn't a post meant to say that larger dogs don't bite or that their bites aren't serious.
If a small dog is aggressive should it be taken just as seriously? Yes. The fact these dog bites are largely ignored contributes to bad dog ownership bad breeding practices and a lot more asshole little shit dogs.
Any big law associates, who live alone, out there with dogs? I am desperate to get a dog, but I am worried it would be unfair to the dog because of the long hours I’d be away from my apartment. Would love to hear anyone’s experience!
EDIT: thanks to everyone for their advice! Seems like this is something I’ll have to consider after I have started the job to see what, if any, flexibility I have regarding in office/WFH, apartment location, and budget. To those of you with dogs already, give them some love for me :)
edit: neighbors* fudge autocorrect.
I just called animal control and submitted all the videos we have of them neglecting their dogs. And I used my weapons grade autism (I read the entire county law to find everything to report) to report that the dogs also didn’t have rabies tags or collars on.
I reported the dogs to the community, again. Last time they couldn’t do anything because they were ESA’s.
If the barking doesn’t stop I’m getting a disability rights advocate because the loud nonstop barking hurts my autism.
Thank you guys for being my safe place when the nuts say a dog will help my autism.
Edit for others with autism, cats have been much better at helping me with my social issues, like boundaries far more than a dog ever did.
I know that sounds bad but hear me out.
My sister and brother in law each had their own dog when they started dating. He has a German shepherd and she has a little terrier. The German shepherd is 3 now and the terrier is 6 or so. Now they are married both dogs live with them.
Now here is where I come in. My sister is pregnant with her 2nd child. She had complications during the first pregnancy so the doctor told her to take it easy. She called me to vent one day.. saying that her husband didn't want to help her with the terrier because she isn't his dog. My sister should be able to do it. He takes care of his dog. She should take care of hers. It is hard for her to walk Princess and bath her because she has to bend down. It can be hard for her to feed the dogs too because it requires bending. And she is PREGNANT. So she gets tired easily.
So I told my sister. Don't worry about it. I got you. I started going over every other day or so to walk Princess and feed her. I bath her once a month to. It is just to help with some of the work. I can't go everyday unfortunately. I haven't done any of that for his dog simply because he always says that Princess isn't his dog. So I shouldn't have to take care of his dog. After about a month now, my brother in law finally confronted me about it. He asked me why it was that I would feed, bath and walk Princess but not care about Lucky? I told him straight out. You said that Princess isn't ur dog which makes Lucky not my sister's dog. Why should I take care of your dog? You gonna pay me??
Well he and his parents called me an asshole and said that I was being so rude. If I was taking care of one of the dogs I should take care of both. I shouldn't be walking one without the other.
I forgot to mention. I work at a dog daycare so to them it isn't a big deal for me. I am around dogs all day and care for them all the time. What is one more dog right? Well am I the asshole?
Hello,
This post is for anyone who is looking to help the family of little three year old Aziz who was killed by dogs in his own back yard. If you are not interested in this subject, I apologize. However, since the petition for his justice had OVER 20,000 signatures, I wanted to make the effort to post here since there is no local board that I found for Carteret, NJ.
The issue in this case is that there are no laws in effect that the prosecutor can use to hold the owner of the dogs accountable. This is an issue that needs to be taken up with the Carteret City Council, the Mayor, and perhaps the City Attorney. All of whom are fine individuals, I'm sure.
Another issue is that there is supposed to be a yearly inspection of the dogs in the city for tags. Whether this was done this year, I cannot say. However, the dogs that killed little Aziz were not vaccinated nor did they have city tags.
Yet another issue is that the prosecutor's office is ignoring witness information regarding the past history of the dogs, accepting only the word of the local rescue who adopted the dogs to the dog owner.
Nobody wants to go down for a dog attack, even if it's fatal. I understand that. However, justice needs to be seen in this case because it appears as if several people are dropping the ball and rather than assisting the family, are forcing them to go through petty courts to sue the dog owner for whatever compensation he can provide. Likely not much because unless the dogs are insured (which they probably aren't since he didn't bother to vaccinate or register them).
I personally believe victims shouldn't have to rely on "go fund me's" when it's obvious that a fatality took place, with witnesses claiming they called the police on the dogs, and the local animal control failing to abide by their local ordinance which requires them to do a check of every dog in the city to make sure they are registered and tagged.
Here is information on when their city council meets. I hope the family finds justice.
Note: ESL and fixed for spelling mistakes.
Update: I work nightshift and my boyfriend works at work. Our dog is never alone by himself.
Second update: In-laws don't want us to bring our dogs because they have cats and the mother is wheelchair bound. They think it dog will get run over or the cats will be scared. Their irrational fear, not mine.
Sorry I just got in a fight with my boyfriend about leaving my dog alone for more than 6 hours. Still angry.
Today we were supposed to have dinner with my in-laws. To me dinner usually starts at 6 pm and I have a small dog at home. I try not to leave him alone in the house for 6 hours because I don't want him to pee or poop in the house. I also feel bad for leaving my dog alone for such long period of time.
My boyfriend today told me he wanted to be at his brothers house at 3 pm just to hang out. I did a quick mental calculation. We would be there at 3 pm. Dinner at 6 pm. Then they always hang out for hours after dinner. My dog would be alone for more than 6 hours.
My boyfriend was pissed that I refuse to compromise. (He insisted we showed up 3 house before dinner and stay at least 3 hours after dinner.) I told him I am going to drive separately so I wouldn't be held "hostage".
AITA because his family are very nice to me. I just don't think 6 hours + dinner is fair to my dog. My boyfriend just let and he was pissed. He told me I am using my dog as an excuse. We have never left my dog alone for more than 4 hours.
AITA for refusing to leave my dog alone more than 6 hours and insist on driving separately to my in-laws house. I don't want to be forced to stay there and my boyfriend and I will arrive separately. He is pissed and his family are going to think we are fighting (and we are.)
Hi, I have been reading up about the law around service dogs and where they can/can't be denied access to. And while I am aware that another person's allergies or fear of dogs are not a valid reason to deny a service dog. If the person providing the service, say a cashier, has severe cynophobia and is completely unable to serve the person. Would they be forced to either do it anyways or face legal repercussions?
To be clear, this is merely a curiosity and is not meant as an attack or anything of the like.
Honestly man imma keep it a buck fifty, if instead of people bitching about god knows what, and getting the project canceled, they would instead push NYC to add a taser to the robot, it would solve everything.
There is a guy with gun who can potentially be a threat to cops if they try to get close to him so instead they have to shoot him? No problem. Who gives a shit about a piece of metal. Send the dog after the guy with a taser. Thing runs at 20mph i think so the guy can’t out run it or whatever, the dog can tase the suspect. No ones in danger. No need to shoot anyone. Nothing. Everyone wins. But nah y’all had to ruin one of the best chances we had of fixing a problem.
My wife and I visited her family for the first time in over a year for mother's day. We're fully vaccinated and she's been missing her family a lot. We've been together for 10 years, married for over 2 years, and I've been out to her family as a trans woman for over 5 years.
I guess in the past year of not being around people I forgot just how much they accidentally misgender me. I really do get the feeling that it's accidental and not on purpose, and my wife corrects them every time that she's around when it happens. It's just exhausting.
The weird thing is, they also misgender our dog about as often as they do me. Our dog has a male name and we've only ever used he/him pronouns for him since we adopted him over 4 years ago.
I've never heard them misgender anyone else, human or animal, even in passing. I don't know what I can even do about it, but it seems like terrible way to thank me for the nice dinners I cooked.
So due to unforseen medical reasons, the inlaws have been staying at our house with their two dogs. I feel like a jerk but recently I discovered the dogs have been peeing on my new sectional and ottoman I just bought a few months ago. We have our own dog but she doesn't pee on furniture she goes outside or we always keep one pee pad she goes on.Can anyone recommend a good waterproof couch cover from personal experience? Or how to best clean and disinfect without usingntoo harsh of cleaning products?
I have told my father in law multiple times not to give my dogs alcohol or coffee and on top of that he let's them lick it right out of his cup then my babies expect me to do the same thing. HELL NO!! I will never do that in a million years they have there own bowl of filtered water. (SPOILED DOGS) Any advice? The only problem is my mother in law loves these dogs and I hate to take them from her. They make her feel better everyday (we live with them) cause she has cancer. I dont know what to do my father in law just won't listen to me and I know caffeine and alcohol is lethal to dogs. PLEASE HELP!!!
Throwaway to prevent drama.
For some context, my brother in law [Jake] is 20 and lived with his and my wife's [Emily] parents. Recently, there has been some work being done to their home so he has had to move in with us whilst my MIL and FIL moved in with another family member. Jake has some pretty bad anxiety issues and is prone to panic attacks. There's also some other things that I can't really bring up due to the rules of this subreddit. Because of this, he has a service(?) dog [Max]. I think Max is trained to help with these things and he and Jake are always together. I completely understand the need for them to be around each other and I would never take Max away from the home for long periods of time. I'm not a total dick.
However, our neighbours have seen Max in passing and think he is absolutely stunning. They always ask to see him but they are always (politely at least) told no by Jake. Yesterday, when Jake was in the shower, our neighbour was asking about Max and I decided to take him out for a couple of minutes so our neighbours could meet him. We were literally at the end of the driveway. Eventually, Jake left the shower room and couldn't find Max and instead of acting like a rational human being when he didn't find Max in the house,. he broke down and had a panic attack. I understand that he can't control when he has panic attacks but it just seemed like such a trivial thing to get upset over.
Emily came out and got Max, sitting with Jake until he'd calmed down. He was crying and clinging to the dog like a damn child. Emily got him settled and into his bed and started berating me for it. Some choice words were thrown around and I told her that if her brother wasn't such a goddamn baby then he'd have his own house, we wouldn't be stuck with him and none of this would've happened. Jake heard and will not speak to me now.
I can see why she'd think I was the asshole here and I feel like a bit of a dick because the kid had a panic attack over it and I really didn't mean for him to hear anything I said. But at the same time, I meant what I said and I do feel like he overreacted a little bit over the dog, we were only outside for five-ten minutes tops.
eta
Fine, i get it okay. I was a massive asshole. I'll say sorry to him and not touch the damn dog again. Happy? You can all quit insulting me now.
I was hiking this past weekend on a trail that is clearly marked with signs that say "All dogs must be on a leash". As I'm walking the path, there are tell tale signs that shitty dog owners have been using the trail. You guessed it, piles of fresh dog crap every hundred yards or so. It's a wooded trail and I am rounding a bend when I see a mid-sized dog, no leash, with a metal, silvery, chain collar. I stop when I see him, and gauge his aggressiveness, meanwhile I'm grabbing my pepper spray in my hoodie pocket.
Thankfully, it's not aggressive. Then I hear it's owners behind it. As we get closer, I raise my voice (but don't yell) and say, "Dude, there is a leash requirement for this trail, please leash your dog. We don't know your dog."
The guy says, "Oh, sorry, I'll put the leash back on..." and starts to leash his dog. As I walk past the girl of the couple she mumbles, "We had a leash on him for most of the walk..."
Like that makes any difference. A leash law is a leash law. It's to protect the public and the dogs. And, like I said, their dog seemed very peaceful. But I don't know that he truly is. I'm also guessing that their dog was one of the dogs that shit on the trail, because they weren't carrying any dogshit bags.
Shitty dog owners rely on a passive public that won't call them out when they are breaking the law. More people need to be assertive and tell people to leash their dogs when signs are posted or city ordinances are in effect.
Ive been renting for about 7 months and all was well until i asked to check out some "tapping" noises coming from upstairs , they looked into it saying maybe it was the vents , checked that out wasn't it , then they said maybe its a woodpecker , and now it just hasn't stopped , they also play with their dogs early in the morning (scraping noises for like 10-15 mins) and boom around upstairs from like 4-9 am and then calm down .
I was in the hospital for surgery and i asked my grandmother to go into my house to gather some things to keep me busy , i have 2 cameras in my house and as I'm guiding my grandmother to these things id like in the hospital my landlord is seen just standing there in my place , my grandmother confirmed she did NOT give the landlord any kind of consent to enter and have a chat.
But now on top of all this they are having a relative move in to the premises and haven't given me any kind of notice or anything , expecting me to just move out at the end of THIS month , I'm really tired of this shit and i don't really know what to do without causing the situation to arise or get worse , like coming up with damages to withhold some or all of the damage deposit.
Also just for reference , I'm currently unable to just move out of the house due to my financial situation so i basically NEED the 3 legal months of eviction due to a relative moving into the place . otherwise i would just high tail it and report them AFTER ive moved out for renting out the basement in the way they did with me , and doing the things they've been doing.
