A list of puns related to "Country Name"
Well Kenya?
Dolly Pardon.
Gawrsh Brooks
the USB
Miles.
Chile.
C eh N eh D eh
Her: βWhoβs Becky Stan? π€¨
... Ohhh πβ
Ryan: Are you Finnished yet?
Dave: No, but you bet Iβm Russian to fix it! Israelly confusing. Kenya help me out?
R: Sure.
Car makes weird sound
R: Guatemala with the car?
D: Iβm Czeching it out, and it seems like somethingβs wrong with a piston or two. You got any ideas, because Iran out. What a Spain. Oh well, letβs put some elbow Greece and try to finish it by tonight.
R: I hope so. Damn, tonight is a Chile one.
D: Yep, and itβs definitely China distract me.
R: Iβm kinda Hungary, I want Togo buy a sandwich or two.
Later
R: Oman, itβs already 9 Pm, thereβs Norway that we can fix it by tonight.
D: Thatβs what we are Guinea find out.
R: I will Taiwan more way to speed things up, but itβs pretty risky.
D: Well, we somehow Ghana find out. 10:30 Pm
R: Ok, Tur the Key!
Car turns on
D: Yes! The Caribb is ean! Uganda be kidding me! I canβt Bolivia did it!
R: Hey, I canβt Belize it either!
Sheβs my Faith Heeler.
I'm creating a drinking game where every important event equals to drinking, but I am nowhere close to NAMING my drinking game. A friend of mine recommended this subreddit, saying that people drop some really punny puns here. Give your ideas for a title, I think up to 6 words would be okay.
Let's see what you can do!
What you need to know about the game:
That's basically it.
And how did he get so many countries named after him?
There was a bunch of Canadians sitting around the table and one guy suggested they start naming letters their country name should contain. One person said βC, eh?β A second person said βN, eh?β A third person said βD, eh?β
A little boy named Tom was approaching his 3rd birthday, and absolutely adored the show "Tractor Tom", partially because of his name being spoken, and partially because he loved tractors.
As the day drew nearer, his parents decided to buy him a toy tractor as a gift. The rest of his toys were gone with the wind at this point, as Tom spent all his waking hours playing with this one tractor toy.
Fast forward a few years, and Tom's now approaching his 10th birthday, with his love for tractors intact and intensified. His parents discuss what to get for him, and decide that a ride-on tractor to replace his bike is the best gift they can give him.
Tom absolutely loves the gift, and spends all of his time out of school riding around the neighbourhood while his bike collects dust in the garage.
We come forward a few more years, as Tom approaches his 18th birthday, with an only intensified adoration of tractors. His father pulls him aside on the morning of his birthday, saying "Now son, I know that we've promised you a car, but we know what you really want."
He leads him outside, to a brand new tractor with a bow on it, saying that this is his welcome to adulthood.
Tom is beyond excited, and spends the next few months going everywhere in his tractor - grocery trips, bars, classes, friends' houses.....
Again, a few years later, Tom is driving down a back country road, in the middle of nowhere, with his tractor, in the middle of a storm. The tractor breaks down, and with no air conditioning or any form of modern comforts, Tom is in a miserable mood until someone finally comes past for him to flag down for help. After this, Tom realises that although tractors are fun, maybe they're not the best transport method out there.
Tom ages through a few more years, and finds himself driving down another road in the middle of nowhere in his car, and sees a house on fire just off the road. Being a good samaritan, he pulls over and heads up the driveway to a woman running out of the house screaming "Please, help, help! My baby is trapped in there! Go and call 911, please!"
Tom turns around, then, before leaving, has a brainwave.
He turns back and walks towards the flames, saying "Don't worry, ma'am, I've got this."
He takes a deep breath in, and the fire disappears into nothingness. As you'd expect, the woman is in awe, and asks, "Oh my God, how did you do that?!"
Tom simply responds, "Well you see ma'am, I'm an extractor fan."
So my dad was going through his normal morning ritual, when he screamed "GODDAMMIT" from the bathroom. He walked out a few minutes later, looking sad.
Me: "What was the yelling about?"
Dad: "I dropped my toothpaste."
Me: "That made you upset?"
Dad: "No, ZTheJerk. Upset doesn't cover it. I'm absolutely crestfallen."
Hey redditors, I need your wit for a good cause,
I'm gonna graduate in less than two weeks and in my country (Italy) is traditional to give a token to those who attend the graduation and for that reason I've decided to brew some beers and give a bottle each. I'm now in the process of deciding the name of my beer and I would like to have something witty and cool but have no idea.
The possible themes would be graduation (or laurea in italian), bioengineering, biomedical engineering, engineering or, best of all, BOOBS (or any synonym) as that's the theme of my master thesis.
Thanks in advance for any help I'll get
My brotherβs wife has been pregnant for five months and decided that they wanted to reveal the gender of the baby at our family reunion of about 40 people.
One night, after just finishing up a BBQ, my brother and his wife stand up and announce to the family that they are going to have a little baby girl. Everyone starts cheering, naturally.
Once the cheers die down a little I shout out, βDo you have a name for the baby yet?β
My brother replies, βYeah. Liana Noelle.β
Everyone starts to βOoohhhβ and βAhhhhβ and proclaim how pretty of a name it is.
Then after a moment I shout, βHow the hell are you supposed to spell Liana with no L?β
Edit (10/22/2014): Probably won't be seen or noticed by anyone, but my baby niece was just born today! She's on the opposite side of the country, but I can't wait to meet her!
Back a few decades, I was working in a program with a local college in the Middle East.
The name of the program for ExPats has the clever acronym of "IDEA" (hey, I said it was clever); which stands for "Inter-Departmental Educational Adjunct". It's interdepartmental because my particular specialty not only covers field geology but also paleontology and a bit of archeology thrown in for good measure. Everyone hopes to have a good IDEA...
ahem...
Well, we saddle up and head for the Dune Sea out in the west of the country, where the Precambrian, Cambrian, Silurian, Cretaceous, Pliocene, Pleistocene, and Holocene crop out and access is relatively easy and non-injurious.
Well, we caravan out, some 30 Land Cruisers, Nissan patrol, and the odd Mitsubishi Galloper strong. We all get our maps, compasses and split up into 5 or 6 special interest groups ("SIG's"); where each IDEA has his own GPS and LIDAR laser ranging apparatus. Reason being, that there are very few benchmarks out in the desert, and even those are constantly at the mercy of the shifting and ever-blowing sands.
Since we're split into groups and at any one time, ranging up to and including some 50 km2, when a real find is located, a device called the "DIME" (Digital-Interface Monitor Encoder) is attached and programmed into the GPS for location later; it is a digital sort of low-frequency transponder, developed from technology used by offshore drillers and jacket setters where benchmarks are even more transitory.
The way it works is rather simple. When something is to be marked for later retrieval, a series of wooden posts are pounded in a triangular manner around the find and the DIME is set, programmed with the GPS and attached to one or more of the posts.
That's the theory, at least.
Everything works well, especially all the hardened electronics and computer gizmos, but attaching the DIME to the stakes is the real problem. It can't be nailed, screwed or fastened with any sort of metal contrivance as that farkles the magnetic field and causes all sorts of goofy spurious signals. Zip ties don't last long in the heat and duct tape is right out. Many sites have been lost to the shifting sands this way.
Velcro doesn't work too well, as the sand fills the hooks of the receiving piece of velcro and soon renders it useless. String or fishing line work, but that's temporary (they melt). Glue or mastic are out as these are supposed to be temporary. Even plastic sleeves don't work due to the heat out
... keep reading on reddit β‘Many years ago, all the elders came together to name their wonderful country. The elders argued for many days, and could not come to an agreement on the name. One brilliant elder came up with a great idea, they would put all the letters of the alphabet into a hat, pull them out, one at a time, and that's what the name of their new country would be.
Of course, the elder who came up with the idea was chosen to pull the letters out of the hat. Elder: C, eh. N, eh. D, eh
I'm not the only person in India named Arpan tho. You'll find many /r/puns in my country.
Foodlandia is a country where every city is named after a food and every city has a guild to represent it in competitions and such.
It was the finals of the national city vs. city trivia quiz and the two remaining contestants were guilds from Curry City and Pasta City.
The final question was "Which is the most popular pet in Foodlandia?". Each city's guild put their answer in a sealed envelope and they were stored for the next days big reveal.
On the next morning the officials went to retrieve the envelopes and they found a horrific sight, a dead spy from Pasta City and in his hand an opened envelope with a paper inside that read "Curry City Guild: The Cat".
In my business law class we were discussing this court case. In the case, a woman named Courtney was hitting off the tee box at a country club and sliced the shot off the course. The ball hit a guy who was working on a nearby roof, and gave him permanent brain damage. Our professor then asked us who we thought was responsible for the damages: the golf course, the course designer, or the woman. A student in the back asks "Well what if Courtney was drunk while she was playing" to which our professor responded
"Well then we would just have a classic case of drinking... and driving."
I'm still not sure which was louder, my friend and I bursting out laughing or the collective groan that filled the room.
Me and my band are all studying Geography at uni, and we want a name that is a geography pun... but not just about countries. It could be a play on the word "Geography", or something related to the subject. Help please!!
Germany has to be one of the smelliest countrys in Europe
-Its so bad they have a town called Cologne
Did you know France has a sibling that had a child?
-Neither did I but its the only explanation for Nice
Poland has this uncanny habit of not finishing its stories
-Warsaw what?
Belgium loves its greens
-City named Brussels gives it away
Everytime i tell anyone of these I need to laugh as the absolute cringe my girlfriend makes and then laugh through the pain of her hitting me whilst saying "Its just not funny".
Personally I love them and I thought i would share them with you.
One day at a US immigration office, a man walked in seeking citizenship. The desk clerk began the usual questioning: "name, occupation, country of origin"? The man replied, " Juan Martinez, illusionist, Mexico".
During the process Juan made small talk and displayed his talent as an illusionist. The clerk found him to be a charming, funny, and charismatic man, which put the normally grouchy clerk in a great mood!
The clerk was so enamored by Juan, he let him skip the formalities and allowed him straight into the US.
After Juan left, a coworker asked the clerk why he would allow a man to just walk in to the US. To which the clerk responded...
"For once in my long career working in immigration, I was truly amazed and entertained by a potential citizen, so I decided to waive a magic Juan"!
There's a church in the country that is looking for a bell ringer for church on Sundays. A guy comes in for the job but he has no arms. The priest says "How are you going to ring the bell with no arms?"
"Come up in the bell tower with me and I'll show you."
The priest figures he'll humor him so when they get up there the backs all the way up to one side and runs full force into the side of the bell sending a "BONG" across the valley. The priest is so impressed he hires him. That Sunday the time comes and our bell ringer is all ready, backed into the corner. Runs full force and slips at the last minute falling to his death 100 feet below. A detective comes to investigate so the priest tells him the whole story. "We have to notify his next of kin, do you know his name?"
"No, but his face rings a bell."
The church now has to replace this guy so another guy comes in and coincidence of coincidences, he has no arms either. Same method of ringing the bell. Same accident. "Do you know his name?"
"No, but he's a dead ringer for the other guy."
Dad: "Look, ImRedditingOnMyPhonr, they're gonna move me!" (Pretending to sob and pointing at a movers truck) I stared at it until I I read the name on the side of the truck, "Town & Country Movers", I thought about it for three more seconds before realizing my dad's car is a Chrysler Town & Country, facepalms and grunts were well had
It's not really funny, but it's one I've heard from my dad. And also English isn't my first language.
Two brothers were going over country border in two cars. The first brother was so drunk that he was crying. The border police stopped him, took his ID and asked him why was he crying. He said that his dad has died, they said their condolences and let him go. Then they stopped his brother, took his ID and saw that they have the same last name. They said their condolences to him and he looked at them like he had no idea what they were talking about. They saw that and asked him if his dad has died and he said 'Yeah but 20 years ago.'
My mom made low country boil (crab legs, shrimp, sausage, potatoes, onions, corn all in the same pot. amazing) and when she set the table she set down a few nut crackers for the crab legs.
Mom: We don't have enough so these are for sharin'
Dad: There is no one named Sharron here so I'll use them.
Once upon a time in the 80βs, the religious supreme ruler of a middle eastern country fled outside military forces seeking to strip him of his power using whatever means necessary. Fearing for his life, he was secretly smuggled into the US where he reluctantly shaved his beard and attempted to blend in.
He successfully went native and got an apartment, and soon realized he needed a job to pay for food and rent. He didn't want to do any sort of manual labor or serve others, as he craved comfortable control. He eventually became a toll booth operator, where he enjoyed sitting in his high chair, making people pay him so that he would grant them passage. Over time he grew bold and began to use his own judgment on what vehicles would pay him for his blessing to cross.
One day, two semi-tractor trailer beverage trucks were in his line, a Pepsi truck in front, and a Coke truck behind. The Pepsi truck pulled up and he said "Pepsi truck, you may pass for free." The Pepsi truck driver happily accepted, and over his CB radio told the Coke truck driver βThis guy just let me through for free!β. When the Coke truck pulled up, hoping to also pass for free, the toll booth dictator said "Coke truck, you will pay me 100 of your American dollars."
The Coke truck driver was livid, and said "You let that Pepsi truck pass for free! You want me to pay 100 dollars?! Thatβs outrageous! I am going to report this! What is your name?!" Our toll booth operator proudly replied "Ayatollah Cokemainly."
And how did he get so many countries named after him?
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