@my office: 4 yr boy says β€œwhy did the Christmas cookie go to the dentist?”

Because he had Ginger-vitis!

That father had the biggest smile on his face.. happy holidays everybody!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/tizom
πŸ“…︎ Dec 27 2020
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What joke was in your Christmas cracker? Mine was, "Why did the baby cookie cry?"

Because his mother was a wafer so long.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Warmheart_84
πŸ“…︎ Dec 25 2018
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What does Santa do to work off all of the cookies and milk he gets for Christmas?

FrostFit

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πŸ‘€︎ u/BothHeadsBig
πŸ“…︎ Aug 18 2019
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My almost 3 year old just dad joked my wife

My wife told my almost three year old son that they would be making Christmas cookies with frosting. My son then said he didn’t like frosting. When my wife asked why, he said it was because the frosting would β€œsting” him.

Frosting. Frost-sting.

I’m so proud of him.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/snake_lamp
πŸ“…︎ Dec 17 2020
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Extended Christmas dad prank

When my brother and I were little, we put out milk and cookies for Santa and carrots for the reindeers on Christmas eve, and woke up on Christmas morning to find them mostly eaten. We were delighted at proof of our nighttime visitors.

The next year our dad told us he had gotten an inside tip from the north pole: that Santa actually liked ramen and beer, not milk and cookies (as other, less well informed, dads and kids had always thought).

For years, we dutifully cooked ramen, put it on a table by the fireplace with a cold beer on the side, and woke up to the ramen and beer having been consumed in the night.

I knew my dad wasn't fond of milk or cookies, but it wasn't until later that we connected the dots and found out the deal about Santa. My dad was the one who ate the Santa food once we went to bed, and he had secretly convinced us to prepare his ideal midnight snack for as long as we believed in Santa.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/queenermagard
πŸ“…︎ Jul 24 2019
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Crumbs - just happened

My kids got these chocolate covered ants cookies for Christmas. They asked me to open the package and I said be careful with crumbs, I don't want ants in the house.

Nobody but me was amused.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/ZER0EFFSGIVEN
πŸ“…︎ Dec 30 2018
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Dad got me while discussing Christmas music

Me: "Have you heard that song called 'Christmas Cookies'?"

Dad: "No, who sings it?"

Me: "George Strait."

Dad: "Is he related to George Crooked?"

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πŸ‘€︎ u/zora894
πŸ“…︎ Dec 25 2014
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My grandmother and I get it.

Sitting in the kitchen talking about oysters for Christmas Eve dinner and mother is rolling dough for christmas cookies.

Mom: Man, oysters are really expensive. Me: I bet those oysters are gonna cost you a few clams (Granda sees mom struggling with dough) Grandma: You're sure gonna have some mussels by the time you're done with that dough

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πŸ‘€︎ u/SoundtheBrolarm
πŸ“…︎ Dec 24 2013
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