Confectionery Store Puns

At your bake and call

just wanted to buy chewing gum and to know whether I can get a discount if I buy alot.

https://imgur.com/eCQvPvX

You guys know those blue gummy shark candies? I don't know how popular they are internationally, but you can find them in American candy and grocery stores pretty frequently. The ones with the blue backs and the white bellies? They have kind of a vague fruit-ish flavor? I know this might seem spurious, and it is, but I've been poking around for a bit and for the life of me I cannot find a definitive answer to where these things originally came from.

A bunch of companies make them, which I guess means it's a generic candy design that has no particular trademark associated with it, and that just muddies the waters (lol) trying to track down the original maker. Google's been useless, all it gives me is links to buy them, and it doesn't help that there's an actual shark species endemic to southern Australia called the "gummy shark" (I looked into this and I didn't find evidence of any actual connection between the two). Wikipedia mentions them once in a single bullet on the "gummy candy" article, and it's vague with no citation. They've been around for at least as long as I've been alive, I'm pretty sure. I've asked my dad (in his mid-50s) and he says they didn't exist when he was a kid, so the origin point is probably sometime in the 80s or 90s, but past that I'm totally stumped.

Yes, this question is totally trivial, and I probably would have let it go immediately if it weren't for the fact that the provenance of this specific confection is so weirdly obscured. I feel like I'm the first person to ever look into this or something. I know my researching skills aren't professional grade, so I'm posting this in the hopes that some sort of confectionery historian will see it, and uncover this mystery, so I can finally sleep.

I don't want to step on anybody's toes here, but the amount of non-dad jokes here in this subreddit really annoys me. First of all, dad jokes CAN be NSFW, it clearly says so in the sub rules. Secondly, it doesn't automatically make it a dad joke if it's from a conversation between you and your child. Most importantly, the jokes that your CHILDREN tell YOU are not dad jokes. The point of a dad joke is that it's so cheesy only a dad who's trying to be funny would make such a joke. That's it. They are stupid plays on words, lame puns and so on. There has to be a clever pun or wordplay for it to be considered a dad joke.

Again, to all the fellow dads, I apologise if I'm sounding too harsh. But I just needed to get it off my chest.

Do your worst!

I'm surprised it hasn't decade.

Union Plus, a nonprofit organization, works together with almost all major labor unions in the US to offer a free college benefit for union members. They provide free, fully accredited degree programs via Franklin University, Central State University, Paul Quinn College, and Eastern Gateway Community College. To qualify, you just have to have a GED or high school diploma and be a member of or have a family member(spouse, GF, BF, brother, sister, parent, grandparent) who is a member or retiree of a qualifying labor union(unions listed below).

Union Plus Free College

Following are a few degree options that are offered. Associate degrees are listed first, followed by Bachelors.

Associate Degrees:

• Health Services
• Social Work
• Associate of Arts (General Studies and Transfer)
• Criminal Justice
• Teacher Education Degree (Associate of Arts)
• Patient Health Navigator
• Healthcare Administration
• Professional Office Management Degree
• Accounting
• Paralegal
• Business Management Degree

Students enrolled in the Business Management Degree may enroll in embedded optional certificate programs designed to give students a solid foundation in business, as well as additional instruction in specialized areas.

Business Management Certificate options include:

• Advertising
• Cyber Security
• Data Analytics
• Digital and Social Media
• Environment and Conservation Studies
• Entrepreneurship
• Finance
• Hospitality: Food and Beverage Management
• Hospitality: Hotel and Event Management
• Human Resources Management
• IT Help Desk
• Labor Studies
• Marketing
• Operations and Logistics
• Programming & Development
• Project Management Fundamentals
• EGCC offers some additional programs in which students can enroll, but some content fees may apply.
• Those programs include:
• Information Technology
• Health Information Management
• Medical Coding Specialist
• Medical Scribe Specialist
• Fire Science

Bachelor's Degrees:

• Bachelor of Arts, Business Administration-Accounting
• Bachelor of Arts, Business Administration-Entrepreneurship
• Bachelor of Arts, Business Administration-Fundraising and Philanthropy
• Bachelor of Arts, Business Administration-Management
• Bachelor of Arts, Health and Wellness (coming Summer, 2022)
• Bachelor of Arts, Legal Studies • Bachelor of Arts, Liberal Arts-Communications
• Bachelor of Arts, Liberal Arts-General
• Bachelor of Arts, Liberal Arts-History
• Bachelor of Arts, Liberal Arts-Pol

UPDATED 1.18.2021

It’s my first time selling but I have purchased a number of times from the swaps! I don’t recall all the prices I purchased things for so if something seems off please let me know. Most were RIS but some things have been purchased directly from the companies. Prices are in USD as that is how I purchased majority and it’s easier for me than converting! $10 dollar minimum please! since it is my first time selling I'd like to keep it to Canada right now but may consider US if someone is really interested in something.

Shipping to Canada is usually around 2.50- 4 for letter mail (this does not come with tracking so purchase this way at your own risk.) Tracked shipping can be calculated. A lot of my labels have oil stains on them (I didn't store them very well in my "to swap" pile) so please do not purchase if that will bother you. If there is something you would like a picture of to verify please let me know. Payment through PayPal G&S and I will pay fees.

Most are full sizes and mostly full unless otherwise specified :) I have a lot of samples that I’m too lazy to list so you’ll probably get at least one. thanks for looking!

Wish list:
FS Necromancer/loup garou Hexennacht FS Firebird vanilla sea salt.
FS Epically epic snow ice
FS carousel Astrid
FS snow ice moonalisa
Try me on gourmands (no chocolate notes please!).
Two finger ballet arcana (sample)
Moonstone NAVA (sample)
Haus of Gloi hair oils

ALKEMIA

Bonfire toffees and woodsmoked oud 10 - A mischievous blend of bonfire toffees, treacle tarts, and dark oudwood steeped in the smoke from a raging bonfire.

ARCANA/ARCANA CRAVES - all RIS

Queen crossbones 16: The adventurous scents of a pirate queen’s far-flung travels: creamy Egyptian musk, wild honey, sweet coconut, and exotic resins.

Golden apple 16: A perfect, crisp, non-spicy apple is gilded with brown sugar, warm cardamom, and organic vetiver

Blueberries crave cocoa 14 (oil stained label): Fresh blueberries with our Hot Cocoa accord (a rich cocoa CO2 infusion melds with the finest dark chocolate and a mug full of fluffy white marshmallows).

SOLD (Blueberries crave sunshine 14 (oil stained label): Bright, summery notes are interwoven with hidden sunspots and secret fire. Lemonade, watermelon, lime zest, golden gardenia, pearl musk, tiny blueberries, Black Dragon tea leaf, and blood red cedar.)

HAUS OF GLOI

Graze 8 (oil stained label) - Cherry almond cake with a layer of thick vanilla fros

They were cooked in Greece.

For context I'm a Refuse Driver (Garbage man) & today I was on food waste. After I'd tipped I was checking the wagon for any defects when I spotted a lone pea balanced on the lifts.

I said "hey look, an escaPEA"

No one near me but it didn't half make me laugh for a good hour or so!

Edit: I can't believe how much this has blown up. Thank you everyone I've had a blast reading through the replies 😂

It really does, I swear!

Because she wanted to see the task manager.

> To see games which have already released, see HERE for just about every game since early 2017.

##January

• An Outcry — Jan 5
• Heaven Dust 2 — Jan 6
• Dead Cells: The Queen and the Sea
• Crowalt: Traces of the Lost Colony
• Nightmare: The Lunatic — Jan 7
• Internet Cafe Simulator 2
• Berserk Mode (Entering Early Access) — Jan 9
• Buck Up And Drive! — Jan 10
• Heck Deck — Jan 11
• Black One Blood Brothers (Entering Early Access)
• Neko Ghost, Jump!
• Monster Hunter Rise — Jan 12
• QUICKERFLAK
• The Kids We Were
• The Anacrusis (Entering Early Access) — Jan 13
• Rescue Party: Live!
• God of War (2018) — Jan 14
• Supraland Six Inches Under
• New Home: Medieval Village (Entering Early Access)
• Moon Dancer — Jan 15
• Nobody Saves the World — Jan 18
• Warm Snow
• Watcher Chronicles — Jan 19
• Expeditions: Rome — Jan 20
• Tom Clancy’s Rainbow Six Extraction
• Windjammers 2
• Make Your Kingdom
• Pupperazzi
• Aquamarine
• [Hidden Deep](https://store.steampowered.com/app/976

(This post keeps getting rejected, so I'm on an older account now. Third time's a charm, hopefully?)

First of all, I don't want to say that I've "solved" it. The Endless Thread podcast claimed they did as well, but I don't buy their explanation for a second. I don't have confirmation that this is the answer, but I have found an awful lot of compelling evidence for this being the answer. Not only that, but this is the answer that best fits all the major clues given in the original article.

The Mystery

If, somehow, you've avoided the Glitter Mystery all this time, it all started with a New York Times article published in 2018. A journalist visited a major glitter factory, Glitterex, which is headquartered in New Jersey. During the visit, the journalist and her guide had the following, very intriguing exchange:

>When I asked Ms. Dyer if she could tell me which industry served as Glitterex’s biggest market, her answer was instant: “No, I absolutely know that I can’t.”
>
>I was taken aback. “But you know what it is?”
>
>“Oh, God, yes,” she said, and laughed. “And you would never guess it. Let’s just leave it at that.” I asked if she could tell me why she couldn’t tell me. “Because they don’t want anyone to know that it’s glitter.”
>
>“If I looked at it, I wouldn’t know it was glitter?”
>
>“No, not really.”
>
>“Would I be able to see the glitter?”
>
>“Oh, you’d be able to see something. But it’s — yeah, I can’t."
>
>I asked if she would tell me off the record. She would not. I asked if she would tell me off the record after this piece was published. She would not. I told her I couldn’t die without knowing. She guided me to the automotive grade pigments.

So, we've got some major hints here that narrow things down quite a bit. They are:

1. It isn't something you'd necessarily think was glitter, or had glitter in it.
2. It's something people might be upset to learn contained glitter.

These are really important clues, because they sort of narrow down all the major guesses. Automotive or boat paints? They obviously have glitter in them, and no one would care if they did. Cosmetics and beauty? I'm a 35-year-old woman and I know that the makeup community already knows and doesn't care about this - they'd rather see synthetic glitter anyway, considering the issues around mining mica. Aerospace? They might use it, but not in quantities that would even come CLOSE to matching the volume of

Heard they've been doing some shady business.

but then I remembered it was ground this morning.

Edit: Thank you guys for the awards, they're much nicer than the cardboard sleeve I've been using and reassures me that my jokes aren't stale

Edit 2: I have already been made aware that Men In Black 3 has told a version of this joke before. If the joke is not new to you, please enjoy any of the single origin puns in the comments

BamBOO!

They’re on standbi

A play on words.

A while back, I did some research to find snacks and other local Seattle products that could go into a gift basket. Since it's almost the holiday season, and people are starting their shopping. I'm going to list them here, so that if you want, you could create a very Seattle / Washington gift basket of your own! (And support some local business too!) We'll start with the less obvious ones, but if you know if anything gift-basket-worthy that I missed, please comment.

• Ice Chips
  • What: Xylitol-based, sugar-free hard candies.
  • Who: Ice Chips Candy LLC in Yelm.
  • Notes: Founded in 2009, Ice Chips have appeared in Shark Tank. They're based on xylitol, a sugar-alcohol with a very low glycemic index.
• Jaipur Avenue
  • What: Instant chai mixes.
  • Who: Jaipur Avenue in Seattle.
  • Notes: Founded in 2010, a Seattle based chai company creating both mixes for cafe service and individually packed instant chai packets. Actually good, milky chai from a dangerously convenient packet.
• Moon Cheese
  • What: Cheese dried through a vacuum microwave process.
  • Who: NutraDried Food Company LLC in Ferndale.
  • Notes: Founded in 2013 based on technology developed in conjunction with the University of British Columbia. Using a microwave vacuum process (Radiant Energy Vacuum) it's possible to dry cheese using less overall energy without it melting or cooking.
• Frango Meltaways or Dilettante TruffleCremes
  • What: Wrapped chocolate-covered, melt-in-your-mouth chocolate ganache.
  • Who: Seattle Chocolate Company in Tukwila or Dilettante Chocolates in Kent.
  • Notes: This form of truffle was created by the Frederick & Nelson's department stores over 100 years ago. That chain was since purchased by what is now Macy's and the Frango brand name has changed hand a few times. Today, Meltaways are produced by Seattle Chocolates and sold under that name by license. Dilettante, another Seattle chocolate founded in 1976, makes a very nice version of this called TruffleCremes which might be easier to get.
• Fancy caramels or truffles from Fran's, Intrigue, Seleušs, or others
  • What: Fancy artisanal truffles, caramels, chocolate-covered fruits and nuts, and so on.
  • Who: Fran's Chocolate in Seattle, Intrigue Chocolate Co. in Seattle, Seleušs Chocolates in Seattle, and others.
  • Notes: Seattle has a large artisanal chocolate scene, many of whom have made their names creating truffles and other confectioneries. Fran's is probably the most esta

Pilot on me!!

Christopher Walken

Nothing, he was gladiator.

Or would that be too forward thinking?