A list of puns related to "Capital G"
So I had a productive day at work coming up with these Capital City puns a year ago today. Thought they were too good not to share!
Why did the Geordie arrange a holiday to Romania?
To book a rest!
Bob Mortimer was speaking to his comedy partner's wife saying he wanted to take him on a piss up to Iceland. When asked why he said:
I want to wreck ya vic!
Why should you never let a man go swimming in Finland with weights on his ankles?
Coz He'll sinky
What do people most commonly use toilet paper for in Bandar Seri Begawan?
Their Brunei
Catwoman bet her male counterpart he couldn't pronouce the capitol of Nepal. But cat man do.
Why was the Polish man rubbing his bollocks? Coz they warsaw.
I just came up with a cracking pun for Japan. Alas, all the wife could say was "What Tokyo so long?"
The ex Mrs McCartney got naked in East Germany in the 80s. She was known for years in the area as Bare-lin
Cheap flights to Russia still available! Book now! Everything Moscow!
The people of Bahamas think learning Capitol cities is Nassau important
The people of the Netherlands had a need to build a water driven power station as well as an overabundance of pork products. So they used 'Ams to Dam a river.
A husband and wife in the Phillipines were both very, very unwell. The woman was sick, but the man iller.
What's the average Senegalian's favoured mode of transport? Da car
Have you heard about the talking cat in Somalia that only throws insults? The Moggy Diss you
They are obsessed with John Cleese in Uruguay. They love a video of Fawlty towers almost as much as they love a Montevideo
People from Vietnam Hanoi the hell outta me
Rain storms are very rare in Zambia, but in Zimbabwe they Harera
Before you do a joke about Macedonia, let me Skopje right there
I've heard Swedish Ikea workers get stuff for free, they can just take Stockholm
If you are trying to eat Halal in Pakistan, Islamabad or good choice?
Because they donβt deserve to be anywhere near the capital.
I keep hearing about the capital insect erection.
would you gain or lose marks for not using capital letters...?
Capital gainz
Because he was afraid of Capitalism!
should be capital murder.
Because it is the capital of Hungary.
...That's capital punishment!
He was afraid of Capitalism.
The capital of Ireland.
Itβs Dublin every day.
Was not allowed and it must contain a capital.
βchickenkievβ
Because they are the language of capitalism.
Because they hate capitalism.
it was capital punishment
It would seem that their capital is always Dublin.
Because they're not capitalized
It's because he disliked capitalism.
Q: The capital of Pakistan?
A clown was bragging about his knowledge of state capitals. He proudly said, βGo ahead, ask me, I know all of them.β
A friend said, βOK, whatβs the capital of Wisconsin?β
The clown replied, βOh, thatβs easy: W.β
(source: http://bestcleanfunnyjokes.com/clown-and-state-capitals/)
Capital punishment
It's capital is always Dublin!
Because their capital is Dublin
Itβs capital has been Dublin every year.
This typeface group had successfully designed upper-case numbers.
It was called Capital One.
Because their capital's always Dublin.
Because communist countries don't have capitals
Itβs capital punishment
If your onion sang hip-hop, would that be a rapscallion?
I used to be an astronaut, but I got tired of eating out of satellite dishes. I wasn't allowed to eat the Milky Way, even though I had to look at it every day. The worst thing was, I never got to visit The Space Bar. Then, when I was visiting the dark side of the moon, I was bitten by a parasite. Now, you might think it's crazy, but the doctor who removed it called it a lunar-tick.
If "womb" is pronounced "woom" and "tomb" is pronounced "toom", shouldn't "bomb" be pronounced "boom"?
China recently tested a new steroid. It basically turns you into The Hulk. The side effect is it could turn you into a crazed zombie that tends to rip the upper extremities from people. People are saying that this could be the zombie apocalypse. In my opinion, lips have nothing to do with it. I call it ARMageddon. The only way to stay safe now is to not let anyone close enough to disarm you.
I recently was going to join the railroad union. I decided against it because it's complicated. If I received instruction on driving the locomotive, would they call it engineering, or training?
I got a sad story about a flower. I don't know who the heck she pissed off, but damn, now she's a Black-Eyed Susan.
I finally figured out what makes leaves angry. Fall. They get so mad they change color. Some are yellow. They're just afraid and run from their problems. The other ones usually just leave.
I went parachuting with my military buddies once. We landed on a department store. I told him I think we're at the wrong coordinates. He said: "Nope. We're right on Target"
I asked a psychologist if Native Americans have strong emotions. He said "Oh yeah, they're intense".
If a psychotic person thought something made sense, would that thought be psychological?
If Matt Damon were searching for a secondhand store, would he be Goodwill Hunting?
My friend is a Marksman for the military. One day, he went to the armory and asked for 3 snipers. They gave him a candy bar. It was a 3 Musketeers.
I want to be there if Dwayne Johnson ever uses a pizza stone. That way I can smell what "The Rock" is cookin'.
Christopher bought a lemon, and the car broke down. Now Christopher Walken.
Have you heard about the latest bank battle on Wall Street? Capital One and Chase got in a fight and Capital One.
You know what a pirate says to his wenches when he sees the shoreline? "LAND HO!"
A man finds a lamp in the desert and dusts it off. Poof! A genie p
... keep reading on reddit β‘The year is 2045, space travel has finally gotten started.
As major companies scramble to come up with ways to capitalize on this new venture, Nissan decides to end its most popular light truck.
As the last one rolls off the line, they announce: "This is it, folks. This is the Final Frontier."
It's capital is always dublin
Got this joke from another post's comment credit to u/Nah118
Dad: What's the capital of Alaska? Me: Juneau. Dad: No, I don't. That's why I'm asking you.
-__-
Thy teased him because he couldnβt capitalize.
Because Marx didnβt like capitalism
A Capital One
He was afraid of capitalism.
He was afraid of capitalism.
The capital of Ireland β itβs Dublin every day.
Because their capital's always Dublin.
Because he hated capitalism.
Dad: What's the capital of Alaska?
Son: Juneau.
Dad: No, I don't. That's why I'm asking you. Guess Alaska 'nother person then.
Itβs capital has been Dublin every year.
Because their capital is dublin.
Because he hated capitalism
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