My friend Jim has a dog he named Bob. So for Christmas he tried some bells on his dog's tail.

Now when his dog is happy he can hear:

"Bells on Bob's tail ring!"

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πŸ‘€︎ u/lodiman77
πŸ“…︎ Dec 22 2021
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What do you call a dinosaur who’s hiding from the cops?

Doyouthinkhesaurus

Edit: I definitely forgot this came from Jurassic Park. So credit goes to that. But it’s still funny.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Perceptions89
πŸ“…︎ Apr 27 2022
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What do you call a man with no arms and no legs stuffed in your mailbox?

Bill.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Lava_Wolf_68
πŸ“…︎ Mar 03 2022
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Why do dogs float in water?

Because they're good buoys.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Borda922
πŸ“…︎ Feb 06 2019
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NEW!! Celebrity Fun in the Pun candle line!

Chris Pine - Pine scented

Cocoa Chanel - Hot cocoa scented

Beth Crow-ley - Rain, nighttime, and city streets scented

Tom Holly-and - Holly berry scented

JK Row-ling - Lakes and campfire scented

Miley Cypress - Cypress scented

Bob Moss - Forest and moss scented

Juniper Aniston - Juniper scented

Katy Berry - Mixed berry scented

Britney Spearmint - Spearmint scented

Bread Pitt - Bread scented

Tom Cruise - Ocean, salty, alcohol scented

Aurora - Nighttime, wind, whimsical scented

Nicole Kidman - baby powder scented

Justin Beaver - Wood, nature scented

Elvis Parsley - Parsley scented

Steve Cobs - Corn on the cob scented

Banana Montana - Banana scented

Orange Winfrey - Orange scented

Chris Bat - Nighttime, caves, and bats scented

Zoey Salad-ana - Salad, lettuce, leafy greens, tomato, cheese scented

Dwayne the Rock - Mountains, earthy, fresh, crisp, wind scented Jennifer Joe-pez - Nice hot cup o’ joe scented

Chicken Corbin Blue - Chicken and cheese and ham scented

Robert Brownie Jr. - Brownie scented

Sardine-a Gomez - Sardine scented

Daniel Rad-Clif - Clif bar blueberry flavor scented

Leonardo Di-Carp-rio - Fish scented

Halle Berry - Mixed scented

Demi Tomato - Tomato scented

Kevin Bacon - Bacon scented

Mandy S’more - S’mores scented

Mackerel-more - Fish scented

Broccoli Obama - Broccoli scented

WILL.I.SPAM. - Spam scented

Mark Buffalo Wings - Buffalo wing scented

John Lemon - Lemon scented

Shakiramisu - Tiramisu scented

Egg Sheeran - Eggs scented

Benedict Cucumber Patch - Cucumber scented

Adille - Dill scented

Kevin Spicy - Taco scented

Channing Potatum - Potato scented

Melon DeGeneres - Melon scented

Danny Burrito - Burrito scented

Michaelanjello - Red jello scented

Harry Panini - Panini scented

Snoop Hot Dog - Hot dog scented

Paris Hilton - Paris, city of love, generic love perfume scented

Morgan Whipped Cream-in - Whipped cream scented

Mike Fryson - French fry scented

Henry David Thoreaut Lozenge - Cough drop scented

Raisin Williams - Raisin scented

Robert Frosty - Vanilla ice cream scented

Jeff Onion-blum - Onion ring scented

Tom Skittle-ston - Skittles scented

Ralph Waldo M&Mson - Chocolate scented

Malt Whitman - Malt scented

(Friend and I came up with these on the ride down to Boston for a concert, after the β€œI wonder what Chris Pine smells like?” joke was brought up again from a previous time hanging out. I’m particularly proud of Bob Moss and Zoey Salad-ana.)

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Minnara
πŸ“…︎ Mar 09 2019
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Knock, knock.

Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Dogs.
Dogs who?

No they don't. Dogs bark.

Source: reading The World's Greatest Knock Knock Jokes for Kids by Bob Phillips, 2000, p. 25, to my son. This one stood out as a pretty decent dad joke thrown into the standard knock knock format.

Edit: formatting.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/johnmal85
πŸ“…︎ Nov 29 2014
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My friend Jim has a dog he named Bob.

I accused Jim of celebrating the holidays a little too early.

You see Jim tied some bells on his dog's tail.

Now whenever the dog is happy, he wags his tail and.....

Bells on Bob's tail ring!

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/lodiman77
πŸ“…︎ Nov 19 2021
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