Bike Name Puns

A little boy named Tom was approaching his 3rd birthday, and absolutely adored the show "Tractor Tom", partially because of his name being spoken, and partially because he loved tractors.

As the day drew nearer, his parents decided to buy him a toy tractor as a gift. The rest of his toys were gone with the wind at this point, as Tom spent all his waking hours playing with this one tractor toy.

Fast forward a few years, and Tom's now approaching his 10th birthday, with his love for tractors intact and intensified. His parents discuss what to get for him, and decide that a ride-on tractor to replace his bike is the best gift they can give him.

Tom absolutely loves the gift, and spends all of his time out of school riding around the neighbourhood while his bike collects dust in the garage.

We come forward a few more years, as Tom approaches his 18th birthday, with an only intensified adoration of tractors. His father pulls him aside on the morning of his birthday, saying "Now son, I know that we've promised you a car, but we know what you really want."

He leads him outside, to a brand new tractor with a bow on it, saying that this is his welcome to adulthood.

Tom is beyond excited, and spends the next few months going everywhere in his tractor - grocery trips, bars, classes, friends' houses.....

Again, a few years later, Tom is driving down a back country road, in the middle of nowhere, with his tractor, in the middle of a storm. The tractor breaks down, and with no air conditioning or any form of modern comforts, Tom is in a miserable mood until someone finally comes past for him to flag down for help. After this, Tom realises that although tractors are fun, maybe they're not the best transport method out there.

Tom ages through a few more years, and finds himself driving down another road in the middle of nowhere in his car, and sees a house on fire just off the road. Being a good samaritan, he pulls over and heads up the driveway to a woman running out of the house screaming "Please, help, help! My baby is trapped in there! Go and call 911, please!"

Tom turns around, then, before leaving, has a brainwave.

He turns back and walks towards the flames, saying "Don't worry, ma'am, I've got this."

He takes a deep breath in, and the fire disappears into nothingness. As you'd expect, the woman is in awe, and asks, "Oh my God, how did you do that?!"

Tom simply responds, "Well you see ma'am, I'm an extractor fan."

A while ago a friend was telling me how they named their bike Patrick and that their previous bike was the same color and also named Patrick. I replied "Cool. So if you get one more you'll have a Pat Trick."

(•_,•)

I was visiting a friend in Copenhagen, Denmark. As we were having a walk, a shop piqued my interest with the name Loke (which I assumed was one way to spell Loki's name, the Norse God of mischief).

Me: What's that shop over there? Friend: That? It's a bike shop. Me: for Bikings?

Groans and threats to be thrown off the nearby bridge were made.

I've recovering from a bad road bike crash where I fractured my hip and was in the hospital a few days after surgery (about 4 weeks ago). I was knocked unconscious in the crash, but my helmet probably saved my life and I was diagnosed with post-traumatic amnesia.

A few days later I was talking to a friend and he was asking about the crash and I said, "The doctor told me a name for the type of amnesia it is, but I don't remember it..."

He replied with a laugh, "Did you mean to make that joke?"

I didn't. It's hilarious.

So let me set the scene. Me and a friend are sitting at wendy's (were both 17) and this old gentleman walks in. He orders his food, sits down to eat it, then out of no where, gets up and comes over to us. He continues to tell us how he saw someone fall off his bike on the walk here, he goes to walk away, and he says "wait, if anyone ever tells you to go to the doctor cause you're sick, and that doctors name is doctor duck, don't do it because he's a quack." My friend was dying laughing and I just groaned.