Arzawa Puns

Hi everyone!

I'll try my best to abide by the subreddit rules but my post isn't very complex per se...I adore Roman history and in all its history, nothing stands out more to me than the 2nd Punic War. To be reduced to basically just Rome and some garrisons around Italy at one point and from there to bounce back, to never give up and not only win the war but end up becoming the power it became is a truly remarkable story. Even keeping a fight going in Spain and Greece at the same time to keep Hannibal from being reinforced/Macedonians from joining in. I'm surprised Hollywood hasn't done an epic about this. I try to think of any other power that was reduced to to so little and then managed to come back from it. The British Empire was a global power that was tested in WW2 but it wasn't in such a dire situation. The Greeks suffered a lot during Persian invasions and they did turn things around but Persia wasn't vanquished. Alexander was never beaten back by the Persians later either. What example from history outdoes Rome's sheer determination and comeback in the 2nd Punic War?

Do your worst!

For context I'm a Refuse Driver (Garbage man) & today I was on food waste. After I'd tipped I was checking the wagon for any defects when I spotted a lone pea balanced on the lifts.

I said "hey look, an escaPEA"

No one near me but it didn't half make me laugh for a good hour or so!

Edit: I can't believe how much this has blown up. Thank you everyone I've had a blast reading through the replies 😂

They’re on standbi

Pilot on me!!

Dad jokes are supposed to be jokes you can tell a kid and they will understand it and find it funny.

This sub is mostly just NSFW puns now.

If it needs a NSFW tag it's not a dad joke. There should just be a NSFW puns subreddit for that.

Edit* I'm not replying any longer and turning off notifications but to all those that say "no one cares", there sure are a lot of you arguing about it. Maybe I'm wrong but you people don't need to be rude about it. If you really don't care, don't comment.

What did 0 say to 8 ?

" Nice Belt "

So What did 3 say to 8 ?

" Hey, you two stop making out "

I won't be doing that today!

You take away their little brooms

This morning, my 4 year old daughter.

Daughter: I'm hungry

Me: nerves building, smile widening

Me: Hi hungry, I'm dad.

She had no idea what was going on but I finally did it.

Thank you all for listening.

There hasn't been a post all year!

It’s pronounced “Noel.”

After all his first name is No-vac

What, then, is Chinese rap?

Edit:

Notable mentions from the comments:

• Spanish/Swedish/Swiss/Serbian hits

• French/Finnish art

• Country/Canadian rap

• Chinese/Country/Canadian rock

• Turkish/Tunisian/Taiwanese rap

There hasn't been a single post this year!

(Happy 2022 from New Zealand)

Bob

When I got home, they were still there.

So that I could frequently say, "I am going to walk 5 miles now."

Edit: My most popular post on Reddit! 😀 Thank you for the awards.

Just to clarify, 12345678

Me grabbing a soda from my (what I thought was) half full 12pk...

Notices there's only 2;

Me: "Awe man... This is a damn bird box!" Her: "What the hell does that mean?!" Me: (Pulls both cans out & shows them to her) "It's only got Toucans."

I'm not ashamed to admit the look on her face was glorious.

I was just sitting there doing nothing.

“BOOM”?!

"That's what they're fighting about."

free

Because his Visa didn’t work.

Because the audience only responds in a low ha

A happy Uncle.....

"Beauty, because beauty is in the eye of the bee-holder!"

I’d never seen him be 4.

Ice-olation.

She's only eleven and says she came up with that by herself. I'm so proud 😭😭😭

"No, it doesn't."

We couldn't afford a dog...