Ambrose Fleming Puns

India - Sehwag, Gavaskar, Dravid, Tendulkar, Kohli, Dhoni, Dev, Kumble, Ashwin, Srinath, Bumrah

Australia - Hayden, Langer, Bradman, Ponting, Smith, S Waugh, Gilchrist, Shane Warne, Glenn McGrath, Dennis Lillee, Pat Cummins

England - Cook, Hobbs, Root, Pietersen, Stokes, Botham, Flintoff, Knott, Underwood, Anderson, Broad

Pakistan - Hanif Mohammed, Saeed Anwar, Younis Khan, Javed Miandad, Mohammed Yousef, Inzamam Ul Haq, Wasim Bari, Imran Khan, Wasim Akram, Waqar Younis, Abdul Qadir

Sri Lanka - Jayasuriya, Attapattu, Sangakkara, Jayawardene, Da Silva, Dilshan, Matthews, Vaas, Malinga, muralitharan, Herath

West Indies - Gayle, Greenidge, Richards, Lara, chanderpaul, Sobers, Jeff Dujon, Gibbs, Marshall, Ambrose, Garner

South Africa - Smith, Kirsten, Amla, Kallis, De Villiers, De Kock, Philander, Pollock, Steyn, Tayfield, Donald

New Zealand - Glenn Turner, Latham, Williamson, Fleming, Ross Taylor, Crowe, McCullum, Vettori, Hadlee, Wagner, Bond

I don't want to step on anybody's toes here, but the amount of non-dad jokes here in this subreddit really annoys me. First of all, dad jokes CAN be NSFW, it clearly says so in the sub rules. Secondly, it doesn't automatically make it a dad joke if it's from a conversation between you and your child. Most importantly, the jokes that your CHILDREN tell YOU are not dad jokes. The point of a dad joke is that it's so cheesy only a dad who's trying to be funny would make such a joke. That's it. They are stupid plays on words, lame puns and so on. There has to be a clever pun or wordplay for it to be considered a dad joke.

Again, to all the fellow dads, I apologise if I'm sounding too harsh. But I just needed to get it off my chest.

Do your worst!

I'm surprised it hasn't decade.

Two towering bowlers with the same simple bowling plan. Bolt upright seam position and extremely precise line-n-length. Curtly Ambrose and Glenn McGrath are two of the finest bowlers the world has produced. But who's better?

Glenn McGrath makes an easy case for being the greatest to ever play the game. If McGrath had a bunny it was definitely England. His weakest country was the one he played the least in, Sri Lanka, which we will be a pattern with Ambrose. Overall his longevity at an extremely high level is unmatched.

Curtly Ambrose on the other hand has more "holes" in his career, although not primarily his fault. He never played a game in India, only 3 innings in Sri Lanka, and only 5 innings in New Zealand. His worst country was Pakistan, but he never played in the UAE. If I were to take that out of McGrath's stats it would be 31.00 average @ 2.11 WPI. Odd note though, Ambrose bowled better in Australia than McGrath, and McGrath bowled better in the Windies than Ambrose. I also took a look at the bowlers in the time that they played:

The pattern seems consistent. Amrbose seems to have a lower average, but McGrath the higher WPI. Even with all these stats it's hard to tell who truly was the better bowler...

For context I'm a Refuse Driver (Garbage man) & today I was on food waste. After I'd tipped I was checking the wagon for any defects when I spotted a lone pea balanced on the lifts.

I said "hey look, an escaPEA"

No one near me but it didn't half make me laugh for a good hour or so!

Edit: I can't believe how much this has blown up. Thank you everyone I've had a blast reading through the replies 😂

It really does, I swear!

Hey everyone! I do these conference rankings every year so it's finally that time when rosters are more or less set for the upcoming season. The SEC is first up on my list. I also have plans to do the Big Ten, Big 12, ACC, Big East, Pac-12, American, A-10, WCC, MWC, and MVC in the coming days. If there are any other conferences you'd like me to do that are not listed here let me know. As always happy to here your opinions, thoughts, suggestions, etc.

The SEC is going to be really tough this year, especially 1-8. UK should bounce back, Bama & Arkansas look to be just as good as last year, Auburn added a lot of pieces, and Tennessee is strong on paper. LSU, Miss State, and Florida are also teams to watch out for.

Some points of clarification. * means this player is currently injured and in the case of James Rojas could very well miss most if not all of the 2021-22 season. With Keyontae Johnson not sure if and how much he'll be able to play this season. He's obviously a starter if he were fully healthy/cleared but right now not sure so therefore don't have him starting. Also, I would say for the SEC I would have these more in tiers but I feel tiers also messes with the spirit of trying to guess the order. But for tiers I would say:

Tier 1 (SEC Title contenders) - Kentucky, Alabama, Arkansas, Auburn, Tennessee

Tier 2 (Tourney teams) - LSU, Mississippi State, Florida

Tier 3 (Dark horse tourney teams/NIT) - Ole Miss, Missouri, Texas A&M

Tier 4 (Rebuilding) - South Carolina, Vanderbilt, Georgia

Here are my rankings (but keep in mind the tiers where I could realistically see those teams finishing in any order within their respective tiers):

#1 Kentucky Wildcats

Departures: Brandon Boston Jr., Terrence Clarke, Isaiah Jackson, Devin Askew, Olivier Sarr, Cam'Ron Fletcher

Returning: Davion Mintz, Keion Brooks Jr., Jacob Toppin, Dontaie Allen, Lance Ware

Additions: Sahvir Wheeler, Kellan Grady, Oscar Tshiebwe, C.J. Fredrick, TyTy Washington, Daimion Collins, Bryce Hopkins

Projected Starting Lineup: Wheeler, Washington, Grady, Brooks Jr., Tshiebwe

#2 Alabama Crimson Tide

Departures: John Petty Jr., Herbert Jones, Joshua Primo, Jordan Bruner, Alex Reese

Returning: Jaden Shackelford, Jahvon Quinerly, Keon Ellis, Alex Tchikou, James Rojas*, Juwan Gary, Darius Miles, Keon Ambrose-Hylton

Additions: J.D. Davison, Charles Bediako, Noah Gurley, Nimari Burnett, Jusaun Holt

Projected Starting Lineup: Quinerly, Davison, S

Because she wanted to see the task manager.

They’re on standbi

Pilot on me!!

Nothing, he was gladiator.

Dad jokes are supposed to be jokes you can tell a kid and they will understand it and find it funny.

This sub is mostly just NSFW puns now.

If it needs a NSFW tag it's not a dad joke. There should just be a NSFW puns subreddit for that.

Edit* I'm not replying any longer and turning off notifications but to all those that say "no one cares", there sure are a lot of you arguing about it. Maybe I'm wrong but you people don't need to be rude about it. If you really don't care, don't comment.

When I got home, they were still there.

What did 0 say to 8 ?

" Nice Belt "

So What did 3 say to 8 ?

" Hey, you two stop making out "

I won't be doing that today!

[Removed]

Where ever you left it 🤷‍♀️🤭

This morning, my 4 year old daughter.

Daughter: I'm hungry

Me: nerves building, smile widening

Me: Hi hungry, I'm dad.

She had no idea what was going on but I finally did it.

Thank you all for listening.

There hasn't been a post all year!

You take away their little brooms

It was about a weak back.

Why

It’s pronounced “Noel.”

BamBOO!

After all his first name is No-vac

What, then, is Chinese rap?

Edit:

Notable mentions from the comments:

• Spanish/Swedish/Swiss/Serbian hits

• French/Finnish art

• Country/Canadian rap

• Chinese/Country/Canadian rock

• Turkish/Tunisian/Taiwanese rap

There hasn't been a single post this year!

(Happy 2022 from New Zealand)

Nothing, it just waved