I try to take my mermaid friends out of Atlantis every now and then to explore the coral reefs, wreckages and collect some shells, but they hesitate to do so...

I think they're a bit shellf conchess

๐Ÿ‘︎ 3
๐Ÿ’ฌ︎
๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/MaverickCS5
๐Ÿ“…︎ May 18 2020
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
This story is about a man called Trevor, and his obsession with tractors.

Trevor loved tractors. And I mean, really loved tractors. Forget any obsessions or high-level interests you may have, chances are they pale in the face of Trevorโ€™s love for tractors.

Every day Trevor would get up, in his tractor-themed bedroom in his tractor-themed house, with its tractor-themed wallpaper and tractor-themed carpets, and he would make his bed with its tractor-themed duvet and tractor-themed sheets. He would go downstairs in his tractor-themed pajamas into his tractor-themed kitchen, with its tractor-themed tiles and cupboards, and he would eat his breakfast while perusing the latest tractor-themed magazine or annual.

Trevorsโ€™s degree in Agricultural Engineering hung on his living room wall, along with a copy of his thesis, which centred around (you guessed it) tractors. The living room was decorated with all sorts of tractor-related trinkets, including die-cast models, paintings and drawings.

The hedges in Trevorโ€™s front garden were trimmed in the shape of tractors. His lawn was vividly decorated with tractor-driving garden gnomes, and his garden furniture was constructed from various parts from vintage tractor designs.

Trevor just had one thing missing from his otherwise tractor-centric life; he had never actually owned, nor driven, a real tractor.

Not for his lack of trying, of course. Trevor had been to many tractor shows over the years, and visited many farms with friends of his, but none of the tractors he had seen had ever been quite right. Trevor was so knowledgeable about tractors that every single one he had come across had possessed some hidden trait that he wasnโ€™t keen on. His first experience of driving a real tractor had to be perfect.

One day, Trevor was flicking through one of his favourite publications, Powertrain Quarterly, when there was a knock at the door. Trevor answered, and it was his friend and fellow tractor enthusiast, Jeff.

Trevor welcomed Jeff in, and over tea and crumpets served on tractor-themed crockery, they discussed the merits of aluminium drawbars and front-end loaders. Eventually Trevor pressed Jeff to explain the reason for his visit.

โ€œWellโ€ said Jeff, โ€œAs Iโ€™m sure you know the convention comes to town laterโ€.

The convention. Trevor had been thinking of little else the past three weeks. The neighbouring town annually threw a convention for farmers, particularly farmyard machinery. There would be combine harvesters, lawnmowers, and of course, tractors.

โ€œYes of courseโ€ replied Trevor

... keep reading on reddit โžก

๐Ÿ‘︎ 8
๐Ÿ’ฌ︎
๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/ShredderSte
๐Ÿ“…︎ Aug 07 2020
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
Huge explosion at the hair brush factory...

Investigators are still combing through the wreckage.

๐Ÿ‘︎ 8
๐Ÿ’ฌ︎
๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/KW-DadJoker
๐Ÿ“…︎ Jun 10 2020
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
There was once a priest who went to see the world after taking his oath....

After many years of wandering, he finally arrived in a small village in the middle of nowhere. The people there believed in the same religion as he did, but they had no church; they had to go to the nearest one which was in a small town 25 km's from there. The priest took the initiative, asked the Church for support, and with the help of the local men they built their own temple. From there on, he was celebrating the Sunday masses, joining together men and women in Holy Matrimony, and saying prayers at the funerals.

Many years passed by like that.

At the end of an ordinary mass, in early spring, on a chilly Sunday morning he was just guiding the people out of the church, was about to close the gates when an unknown man stepped into the churchyard.

With his dirty and torn clothes, he stood before the priest and said:

  • Priest, please be good and give me half a lemon! - the priest was a good man, and even though he thought the request was a bit strange, he went back to the rectory, took out a lemon, cut it in half, took it back to the man and gave it to him, who looked back to the priest with gratitude. However, the priest was curious. He asked:

  • Son, why do you need this half of a lemon? - with a fright on his face, and before the priest could have said a thing, he rushed out of the churchyard gate and took off.

A week later, around the same time, when the priest was leaving the church, he found himself in front of the same man in the churchyard. The man said:

  • Priest, please be good and give me half a lemon! - the priest was surprised by the appearance of the man and his strange request. Of course he was good, went back to the rectory, and brought the half lemon. Placed it in the strangerโ€™s hand and immediately he asked:

  • Here it is, my dear son, but please tell me why do you need this half a lemon? - the man was obviously frightened and immediately ran away but the priest was not sluggish either and ran after him. He wasnโ€™t in a very good condition, he has never run so much and so fast before so he was out of breath by the end of the village, almost fainted. He thought the strange man might appear again next week, and it would be nice if he could keep up with him, so he spent his week working on his cardio. It turned out to be a good idea, because as he thought, the stranger entered the churchyard on Sunday. The priest didnโ€™t even wait for the request, he was good, and brought the half lemon. He received these words from the man:

  • Thank you

... keep reading on reddit โžก

๐Ÿ‘︎ 65
๐Ÿ’ฌ︎
๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/Doty152
๐Ÿ“…︎ Apr 26 2018
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
The driver of a huge trailer lost control of his rig, and ploughed into an empty toll booth, smashing it to pieces.

He didnโ€™t want to get in trouble s o he stopped his truck got out and started to pick up each broken piece of the wreckage and spread a creamy substance on it. Then he began fitting the pieces together. In less than 10 minutes, he had the entire tollbooth reconstructed and looking good as new. The toll manager came up to him, impressed and said, โ€œWow you fixed that fast! What was that stuff you used to stick all the pieces together?โ€
โ€œOhโ€, said the man, โ€œjust a bit of Tollgate booth pasteโ€œ

๐Ÿ‘︎ 8
๐Ÿ’ฌ︎
๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/dandan_56
๐Ÿ“…︎ Mar 14 2018
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
My son was in a terrible car accident...

I happened to pass it on my way home from work and like any good father I immediately pulled my son from the wreckage and called 911. After a few moments my son said, "Dad... I'm dying..." So I squeezed his hand, looked him straight in the eyes and said, "It's nice to meet you Dying, I'm Dad."

๐Ÿ‘︎ 17
๐Ÿ’ฌ︎
๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/DadliestCatch
๐Ÿ“…︎ Jan 02 2015
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
French plane crash

Did you hear about the French plane crash?

They searched the wreckage for survivors but all they found was de brie...

๐Ÿ‘︎ 25
๐Ÿ’ฌ︎
๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/stickyyfingers
๐Ÿ“…︎ Feb 09 2015
๐Ÿšจ︎ report

Please note that this site uses cookies to personalise content and adverts, to provide social media features, and to analyse web traffic. Click here for more information.