My wife regularly confuses the words Burro, and Burrow.
She doesn't know her ass from a hole in the ground.
If you spell the words “Absolutely Nothing” backwards, you get “Gnihton Yletulosba,” which ironically means...
I got the word “Ouch” tattooed on the back of my foot yesterday. My dad asked me if it still hurts.
I told him yes, but it’ll heel.
"Son, I heard you got punished for using the 'F ' word in class. That wasn't fun was it ?"
I'll never forget my grandfather's last words before he kicked the bucket
"Do you wanna see how far I can kick that bucket?"
My teacher asked me to make a sentence with the word defence, defeat and detail
When a horse jumps over defence defeat go first the detail
79% of people don't know opposite words for the following.
- Always
- Coming
- From
- Take
- Me
- Down
Do you know what's the deepest word in English?
I don’t like spelling the word “definitely”
I always end up spelling it defiantly
I had no idea what the word "edit" meant, so I checked in a dictionary
Edit: prepare (written material) for publication by correcting, condensing, or otherwise modifying it.
Who do British people pronounce the word as Bri ish?
Because they drank all the tea
Teacher: use the word geometry in a sentence
Student: One day, an acorn fell off, landed and sprouted. It grew and grew, and one day it woke up and said “gee, I’m a tree!”
What is the longest word?
Smiles. Because there's a mile between the two s.
I got the words “jacuzzi” and “yakuza” confused.
Now I’m in hot water with the Japanese mafia.
What's the most common word that only contains one letter?
If you change word "Love" to "Lunch", you can totally change the meaning of a lot of songs.
All You Need Is Lunch
Do You Believe In Life After Lunch
Lunch In An Elevator
What’s the most terrifying word in nuclear physics?
A man walks into an open casket funeral and approaches the widow at the front. He asks: "Mind if I say a word?". "No, go ahead" she replies.
"Bargain" the man says.
"Thanks" the woman replies. "That means a great deal."
You should never use the plural of a word when you should be using the singular
My wife and I are making some artwork in the name of our favourite Bon Jovi song. So far we have the words "Livin' on".
Shout out to whoever created the word "plethora".
What is the perfect 's' word
What is the meaning of the word "demise"?
Demise is what de cats eat?
Don't use the word "EGG" for your password...
It's very easily cracked.
I've often heard that 'ICY' is the easiest word to spell....
Looking at it now....'I SEE WHY'
What is the Latin word for "one-piece bathing suit"?
What is the only 4 letter word sport that starts with a 'T'?
I hate people who use the same word twice in a sentence...
My 4-year-old son has been learning Spanish all year and he still can't say the word, please.
which I think is poor for four.
What's the longest word in the English language?
Smiles. The first and last letters are a mile apart.
To those worried about eating salad after the recent e coli outbreaks, I have three words for you.
What are the last words of the physical education teacher?
Seven and eleven have the word 'even' in them....
I come up with a really lame two word gay joke the other day that i was afraid my gay mate might find offensive
I was at a friends funeral and I said to the widow “do you mind if I say a word?”
She said go ahead.
I stood up said “plethora” and sat back down.
“Thank you”, the grieving widow responded, “it means a lot”
Me: What is the first letter of the word “yellow?”
Kid: Y
Me: Coz I want to know.
Dad, I need help writing a sentence using the word "irony."
Try this :
I licked a golf club and it tasted irony.
He followed the instructions word-for-word
The best safe word to use during sex is “meatloaf”
Because it means, “I would do anything for love, but I won’t do that”
I've recently started up a band called "Mum's The Word."
If anyone asks, you've not seen us.
I kept telling my brother not to put the Q-tip in too deep, but he never listens to my words.
It goes into one ear, and out the other.
When asked to spell the word for two female deer
people don't think it's does, but it doe.
It is does though.
I looked up the word 'opaque' in the dictionary...
....but the definition is unclear.
I got the word “Ouch” tattooed on the back of my foot yesterday. My son asked me if it still hurts.
I told him yes, but it’ll heel.
I got the words "Jacuzzi" and "Yakuza" confused
Now I'm in hot water with the Japanese Mafia
"Son !!! I heard you got punished for using the 'F' word in class. That wasn't fun, was it ?"
So last week i got myself in a bit of trouble when i mixed up the words jacuzzi and yakuza
Now I'm in hot water with the Japanese mafia
Teacher: "Use the word sugar in a sentence."
Student: "The tea is too sweet."
Teacher: "Where is sugar in the sentence?"
Student: "In the tea!!"
Yesterday I confused the words "jacuzzi" and "yakuza".
Now I'm in hot water with the Japanese mafia.
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