I am helping a gold-medal winning sprinter acheive the highest level of spiritual awareness.

...I feel like The Flash, because I too, am enlightening Bolt.

👍︎ 5
💬︎
📅︎ May 27 2020
🚨︎ report
Why was the spiritual teacher upset at his students?

They wern't present

👍︎ 8
💬︎
📅︎ Mar 01 2020
🚨︎ report
What did the spiritual fisherman say to the whale?

Everything harpoons for a reason

👍︎ 5
💬︎
📅︎ Mar 08 2019
🚨︎ report
Which race of dogs is the most spiritual?

chihuahua

👍︎ 15
💬︎
👤︎ u/xNeron
📅︎ Jun 15 2016
🚨︎ report
What is the most spiritual fruit?

Watermelohm

👍︎ 6
💬︎
📅︎ Dec 26 2016
🚨︎ report
Dad Joke About Yoga

I was asking my girlfriend about her yoga classes, and she said she wasn't really into the spiritual side of yoga, and it weirds her out when some instructors end the class with a communal 'ohmmmm'.

Me: So you're saying there's some resistance to the ohm?

She laughed. She's a keeper.

👍︎ 2k
💬︎
👤︎ u/tbast
📅︎ May 01 2014
🚨︎ report
A beautiful tradition

Martial arts is as much spiritual training as it is physical training. In fact, there is a school of martial arts in Korea where practitioners would spend large portions of the day just meditating.

As they train their spirits to ponder over their place in the universe, the practitioners would also train their bodies to forgo the needs of the physical world. The practitioners would endure days on end without sleep, and live on a single loaf of bread for an entire month.

As they meditate, they would repeat the mantra: “I am one with the universe, it sleeps not so I shall not sleep. This bread is my only worldly attachment but I shall only TAKE ONE DOUGH”

👍︎ 4
💬︎
📅︎ Jul 06 2018
🚨︎ report
I didn't get this one until I was older, when my brother was told the same "story."

Dad: "You know, we're actually descendants of one of the oldest native tribes in this part of the country, right?"

Me: "Really?"

Dad: "Yeah, The Fagawee tribe. I remember when I was little, your grandpa took me on a spiritual pilgrimage through the forest. He drank a lot and smoked some native herbs. The herbs didn't seem to be working, though, because as it got darker, we seemed to be walking in circles. It was cold in the woods and we seemed to keep coming across the same old log. Finally, in the middle of my dad's spiritual trance, he fell to his knees in a clearing, raised his hands high, and proclaimed "We're the Fawagwee!"

Translation: ("Where the fuck are we?")

👍︎ 8
💬︎
📅︎ Jul 30 2013
🚨︎ report

Please note that this site uses cookies to personalise content and adverts, to provide social media features, and to analyse web traffic. Click here for more information.