18 Hilarious The Phone Call Puns

I just got a phone call from the School, "your Son's been telling lies again" they said. " Well, tell him he's getting good at it" I replied, because..

..I don't have a Son.

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👤︎ u/HugoZHackenbush2

📅︎ Sep 23 2021

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I had a phone call today from the police asking if I’d taken the train home last night, about 11:35. I nervously replied “yes, why?”

They said “because they need it back madam.”

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👤︎ u/SkinnyWhiteGirl19

📅︎ Oct 08 2021

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My son accidentally smashed his foot on the table and as he was hopping around the room screaming in pain, I rushed to the phone, picked it up and asked him, "Do you want me to call..."

"A TOE TRUCK!!??"

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👤︎ u/honolulu_oahu_mod

📅︎ Mar 24 2021

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All the astronauts I've met are so bad at returning phone calls.

It's like they've fallen off the face of the earth.

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👤︎ u/megaWatson

📅︎ Mar 12 2021

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What do you call a woman that would rather stare at her phone than look up at the Northern lights?

Aurora Borealis

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👤︎ u/timthedriller

📅︎ Jan 01 2021

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The guy running my town is awful. He doesn’t respond to phone calls because he only works after dark.

He’s a total night mayor.

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👤︎ u/zedhead0628

📅︎ Jun 27 2020

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I was on the phone last night with my niece and she said what do you call someone laying on the floor.

My brother said a liar and she goes no, Matt! Very proud of her.

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👤︎ u/Runningforbeer343

📅︎ Apr 22 2020

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My dad recieved a phone call from the magazine "Runner's World"

women on the phone asks:

"is (mother) home?"
dad: "no, she just ran off"
women: "oh, ok"

I dont think she got it.

edit: This is actually funnier how he said it in dutch (our native language). his words were "ze heeft ze benen genomen" which literally means " she has taken the legs".

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👤︎ u/fireflaai

📅︎ Mar 11 2015

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What do you call someone who sells meats over the phone?

A delimarketer

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👤︎ u/grayfelt

📅︎ Dec 30 2018

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When his wife answered the phone and found out the call was for him, John the fisherman couldn't answer.

He was on the other line.

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👤︎ u/thomasbrakeline

📅︎ Dec 23 2018

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What do you call the phone company's mother?

Ma Bell.

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👤︎ u/______CJ______

📅︎ Jun 19 2018

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Call my Dad on the phone: "Hey Dad, what's up?"

"Oh, not much, just the price of gasoline."

Every. Single. Time.

You'd think I'd learn, but now it just feels wrong if I don't greet him that way...

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👤︎ u/Mycareer

📅︎ Dec 27 2013

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As i was getting in the car i explained to Dad i couldn't call him as my phone died..

he replied "whens the funeral?"

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👤︎ u/elephant_boy

📅︎ Aug 12 2014

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My dad was so excited to call and tell me this one. He was already laughing when I answered the phone.

A guy walks into his dentist's office and says "Doc, I think I might be a moth."

The dentist replies, "ok.....so why did you come in here?"

The man says, "because the light was on."

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👤︎ u/TreborMAI

📅︎ Oct 14 2013

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I had a phone call the other day.

It didn't say much.

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👤︎ u/BLACKOUT-MK2

📅︎ Nov 15 2014

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My son accidentally smashed his foot on the table and as he was hopping around the room screaming in pain, I rushed to the phone, picked it up and asked him, "Do you want me to call..."

"...a TOE TRUCK!!??"

👍︎ 18k

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👤︎ u/madazzahatter

📅︎ Jun 22 2020

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My son accidentally smashed his foot on the table and as he was hopping around the room screaming in pain, I rushed to the phone, picked it up and asked him, "Do you want me to call..."

"...a TOE TRUCK!!??"

👍︎ 180

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👤︎ u/honolulu_oahu_mod

📅︎ Dec 18 2020

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Never fails every time he answers the phone when I call.

Dad:Hello?
Me: Hey Dad
Dad: Straw

Every. Single. Time.
You'd think that I'd learn my lesson.

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👤︎ u/RaleighSoCrayCray

📅︎ Dec 31 2013

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