Chinese ex-president forcibly removed from party conference in full view of the media. what was it about?
I made a joke at the expense of my amputee friend on his birthday party, everyone laughed except him.
I guess he just didn't find it humerus.
Edit : Holy shit it blew up! Thanks everyone!
The Judge's dinner party was terrible.
My wife suggested we go to the Halloween party dressed as Pulp Fiction characters.
She had a great time, but I was stuck on the toilet the whole night.
Why did the ghost go to the Halloween party?
What did the egg say when he left the party?
Why didn’t the skeleton dance at the Halloween party?
He didn’t have anybody to dance with.
I was so exhausted when I went to bed that I slept right through my son and his friends having a raging weed and heavy metal party in the yard all thru the night. As the sun came up, the party was still in full swing and my phone had blown up with messages complaining about the noise and the smell.
So I wake up in the morning and I step outside and I take a deep breath and I get real high and I scream from the top of my lungs ‘WHAT’S GOIN’ ON?’
Edit: so happy that one of my home-made dad-jokes is so well-received :) thanks, everyone!
A woman said she knew me from the vegetarian party
But I never met herbivore.
Why was Iron Man invited to the frat party?
what did the Indian chip say to the melted cheese at the dance party?
Let’s Nacho!
nacho= dance in Hindi!
My friend was really rude during the party.
He would constantly being chewing on twigs and bark while looking over everyone else's heads. Honestly the night was full of him making social giraffes
Why were Mr. and Mrs. Potato Head late for the party?
Mrs. Potato Head took a really long time picking her nose.
There was a party at the Planter's Peanut corporate office today
In the Middle Ages, most blacksmiths would not only forge weapons, but also sell them directly from their own “smithy” shops instead of using a third-party merchant.
Classic example of he who smelt it dealt it.
I have a party trick where I swallow rope and it comes out tied up shaped like the 21st letter of the alphabet.
My friends said I should bring a stripper to the bachelor party
I got a nice one from the Home Depot along with a bunch of wire but they just stared at me.
Which term defines the lack of urge to vote for any political party or candidate in an election?
My Son’s Class Did a Play for the Boston Tea Party.
His teacher told him he would be the tea that was thrown in the harbor. She said he could pick to be any type of tea he’d like. He got so upset that he started running around the class throwing things. I guess he chose to be not tea.
why did the mushroom like to party?
Because he was a fungi !!
Whenever I go to a birthday party, it's important to me to stand out, so I always give the same gift: fabric squares often used in arts & crafts.
I like to make my presents felt.
None of the bankers at the party were having a good time.
Due to insufficient funs.
Why was the communist late to the party?
Why did the mushroom go to the party?
I brought a corked bottle to the party
The other guests whined about the taste.
What did the cannibal get when he was late to the dinner party?
What do you call a party in the basement?
After the Boston tea party did everyone know that…
Do you think we should bring your Grand father's ashes to the party?
Sister: No, we probably dont need toMe: No, I dont think its necessaryUncle: No, I think it's dead weight
While prepping for our daughters bday party, my wife said the bouncy castles are twice the price of last year
Well, i told her, thats inflation for you
why did the spoon dress as a knife for the dinner party?
The invitation said to look sharp.
We all know why the mushroom got invited to the party haha because he was a Fungi! BUT why didn’t he go??
Because there wasn’t mushroom.
Why did the walrus go to the Tupperware party?
He was looking for a tight seal
The party invitation said black tie only
When I went there, everybody was wearing suits and pants too
Did you hear about the mushroom who was kicked out of the birthday party?
It’s a real shame, he was a fungi
I got the wrong ice cream for my kids birthday party.
I guess I just have Breyers remorse
"Hey man, this party at the beach is great!"
If the mushroom was such a fun guy why didn't they have the party at his house?
What did the vegetables say at their party?
Lettuce turnip the beets!
Daughter told me this one... Why did the girl bring toilet paper to the party?
Because she was a party pooper.
Why did the spoon come to the party dressed as a knife?
The invitation said to look sharp.
Why did the mushroom go to the party
Why did the mushroom get invited to the party?
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