The Morning After Puns

A list of puns related to "The Morning After"

Every morning after I get out of the house, a bike comes out of nowhere and runs me over.

It's a vicious cycle

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👤︎ u/ianhooi
📅︎ Nov 29 2022
🚨︎ report
Jehovah's Witnesses knocked on my door this morning. I invited them in asked if the wanted something to drink and eat, both said yes. After finishing their Coffee and Cake I said " so what would you like to talk about?"

They said "We don't know we've never got this far".

👍︎ 91
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👤︎ u/Practical-Link1534
📅︎ Jun 07 2022
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Every morning after waking up, the first thing I do is make my bed.

Tomorrow I’m returning this piece of junk to IKEA.

👍︎ 613
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👤︎ u/porichoygupto
📅︎ May 29 2021
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“You see, doctor, I’m always dizzy for half an hour after I get up in the morning,”

"I have the solution for you," replied the doctor.

"Really, what is it?"

“Well, try getting up half an hour later."

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👤︎ u/crazyfortaco
📅︎ Jun 19 2021
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After turning on my computer in the morning, the first thing I tell myself is “I got this!”

I should stop using WebMD as my homepage.

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👤︎ u/porichoygupto
📅︎ Sep 29 2020
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This morning, after a long night of binging, I got out of bed and looked in the mirror. I saw my haggard, worn-out body and overcome with emotion I realised that for the sake of my family I had to quit cold turkey.

I'm going vegan today.

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👤︎ u/DeathcampEnthusiast
📅︎ Jul 07 2020
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It's the morning after the honeymoon

Wife says, "You know, you're really a lousy lover."

The husband replies, "How can you tell after only 30 seconds?"

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👤︎ u/hayeshilton
📅︎ Aug 10 2020
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The Morning After Joke

The wife and I got busy last night. As soon as we woke up this morning, I say, "Wow, I'm surprised that you are back already!"

She replies, "What?"

And I deliver, "Because I dropped you off at Pound Town last night."

The morning after joke is almost as fun as the night before.

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👤︎ u/sp-reddit-on
📅︎ Nov 28 2016
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Actual conversation with my wife this morning after receiving a wedding invitation: wife: "I put January 19th in the calendar"

Me: "it wasn't there already!?"

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👤︎ u/justryingtokeepup
📅︎ Jun 13 2019
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Dad dropped this one the morning after the South Carolina-Clemson game last sunday.

Dad: You hear it took the Clemson team 8 hours to get home last night?

Me: Why? was traffic that bad?

Dad: They had to go real slow since they didnt want another turnover.

(For those that didnt see that game, Clemson had 6-7 turnovers)

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👤︎ u/PiKappaFratta
📅︎ Dec 10 2013
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How does the quadruple-amputee bear describe the morning after his surgery?

I woke up like this. Pawless.

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👤︎ u/Jbolte254
📅︎ Sep 23 2014
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Every morning after I wake up, the first thing I do is make my bed.

Tomorrow I’m returning this piece of junk to Ikea.

👍︎ 6k
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👤︎ u/porichoygupto
📅︎ Nov 14 2018
🚨︎ report
Every morning after waking up, the first thing I do is make my bed.

Tomorrow I’m returning this piece of junk to IKEA.

👍︎ 436
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👤︎ u/porichoygupto
📅︎ Sep 17 2020
🚨︎ report
Every morning after waking up, the first thing I do is make my bed.

Tomorrow I’m returning this piece of junk to IKEA.

👍︎ 426
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👤︎ u/porichoygupto
📅︎ Aug 03 2020
🚨︎ report
Every morning after I get out of the house, a bike comes out of nowhere and runs me over.

It’s a vicious cycle.

👍︎ 148
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👤︎ u/porichoygupto
📅︎ Apr 30 2020
🚨︎ report
Every morning after waking up, the first thing I do is make my bed.

Tomorrow I’m returning this piece of junk to IKEA.

👍︎ 216
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👤︎ u/porichoygupto
📅︎ Dec 29 2020
🚨︎ report
Every morning after I get up, the first thing I do is make my bed.

Tomorrow I’m returning this piece of shit to IKEA.

👍︎ 158
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👤︎ u/porichoygupto
📅︎ Aug 21 2019
🚨︎ report
Every morning after I wake up, the first thing I do is make my bed.

Tomorrow I’m taking this piece of junk back to IKEA.

👍︎ 13
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👤︎ u/porichoygupto
📅︎ Oct 29 2019
🚨︎ report
Every morning after I wake up, the first thing I do is make my bed.

Tomorrow I’m returning this piece of junk to Ikea.

👍︎ 4
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👤︎ u/Quint_Cordewener
📅︎ Nov 25 2019
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