What do meteorologists, biologists, and archaeologists have in common?

They all get the gist of their field.

πŸ‘︎ 11
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ Jul 08 2020
🚨︎ report
my wife's long con

Not exactly a dadjoke, but she learned from the best.

So, it was last sunday and we did a family trip to the zoo with the whole family. Now our kids are 3 1/2 and 1/2 and we named them after strong animals, think "Leoni" (the Lioness) and "Falc" (the Falcon), not exactly those names, but you get the gist. We decided about our daughter's name about 4 years ago.

While we were standing at the entrance queue, my wife gently stroked our daughter's hair, lifted up our son, placing a kiss on his forehead, looked at me smiling and said:

"I have been waiting for this so long!"

"Uhm, to stand in line at the zoo?"

"No, honey, to .... take our zoo to the zoo!"

*groan*

πŸ‘︎ 6
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Horst665
πŸ“…︎ Jun 26 2018
🚨︎ report
I'm not very clever, looking for some help with dog puns

So I have this app that is centered around dogs. I'm introducing a level system with 7 levels and need clever dog pun names for each level. I have a list here of the gist of what the levels should mean, but they are too boring as of now. Would love to see your pun skills at work!

  • 1: Amateur
  • 2: Junior Varsity
  • 3: Varsity
  • 4: Park Captain
  • 5: Professional Player
  • 6: Park All-star
  • 7: Olympian Dog

Thanks! :)

πŸ‘︎ 2
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Sherlocked_
πŸ“…︎ Aug 19 2016
🚨︎ report
Hawaii Puns

Hello punsters!

My fiancee and I are having a combined bachelor and bachelorette party that will be Hawaii themed and sadly I got stuck coming up with the invite.

I know reddit is full of quips and puns so any help would be greatly appreciated. The gist of the party will be bring a dish to pass around, wear Hawaii themed clothes, and after we will be playing board/trivia games.

I already have something along the lines of dress in your hawaiian clothes to ensure you'll get leigh'd, but any help you wordsmiths can offer would be great!

Thanks reddit!

πŸ‘︎ 12
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/flippinphil
πŸ“…︎ Sep 30 2012
🚨︎ report
German dad joke

Sadly it doesnt work in english. Ill give you the gist though.

Sei ich in einem langweiligen franzΓΆsisch Kurs. Stapel Stifte und Radiergummies, und nach einiger Zeit fragt die Lehrerin was ich den mache. "ich bin nebenberuflicher Hochstapler"

Translated gist: I was stacking pens and erasers in a french class. When the teacher asked what I was doing I said, Im a part time Hochstapler wich can basically mean high-stacker or fraudster

Got the whole class to laugh, twas fun

πŸ‘︎ 2
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Tunro
πŸ“…︎ Oct 15 2017
🚨︎ report
Two dad jokes in two days.

Yesterday I was watching T.V. with my family when a commercial for the new Honda Fit came on. If you've never seen it, the basic gist is, people ask the main man "Will (blank) fit in?" Two minotaurs come on screen and ask and here's what happened:

Mom: I really doubt a Minotaur would fit.

Dad: Maybe they're Mini-taurs.

Groans were had by all.

For the second one I was texting a friend and she said:

Her: I think I have a problem. I've ate ham almost nonstop since that party. Now I'm really sad it's almost gone. I might be addicted.

Me: I guess you'll have to quit cold ham.

πŸ‘︎ 2
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Joshapotamus
πŸ“…︎ Sep 15 2014
🚨︎ report

Please note that this site uses cookies to personalise content and adverts, to provide social media features, and to analyse web traffic. Click here for more information.