I (24M) recently showed up 'unsolicited' to a couples event my fiancée (27F) was invited to 'in a professional capacity'. She is currently very pissed at me.
My fiancée is an attorney. She's been working at a firm for some time since graduating law school. Every year the local bar association organizes this event where attorneys from the area are invited to network and see some old palls from college. The invitation also goes out to the partner of said attorney.
Last year I went together with her and had a merry good old time. I saw some guys there, who also work at her firm, that frequent the performance engine shop where I work as a mechanic. We share similar interests and we pretty much hit it off immediately (we still hang out every now and then). The event got pretty rowdy towards the end (contrary to popular belief a lot of these attorney types aren't the goody two-shoes they pretend to be) and I (amongst others) ended up on stage singing to classics such as Journey's 'Don't stop believin'' (fucking love that song).
However, my fiancée ended up experiencing that night very differently. She pretty much went off by herself during the entire thing. She told me she spent the night networking with a few established attorneys and some old acquintances. She also told me she got a bit embarassed by my actions towards the end and that she would like to put on a professional demeanor in front of her colleagues and expected that of me too.
Now, mind you, we often go off the deep end in the weekends and she doesn't have a problem with me acting like the fool I am then!
So last week when I mentioned how excited I was to go with her again this year, she flat out rejected me! She told me I wouldn't be able to properly behave myself in front of her fellow members of the bar and that was that. I tried promising her that I would be on my best behavior, but "No means no!" was the final answer.
Why would you be embarassed of going to an event with your significant other just for being the person he is? Certainly if that very partner promises to be as innocent as grace itself! The event is literally meant for couples...
Initially I wasn't gonna go, but my newfound friends whatsapped me and I thought "to hell with it". So I got there early, joined up with them (saying she was gonna run late), texted her, had a few drinks, and when she arrived almost got dragged out of the party. I got stomped into my car with strict guidelines to go home and was whipped into mot
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I’m 31m and my fiancée is 29f. We’ve been together for 6 years and recently got engaged. We’ve started wedding planning and discussing details of the reception.
We thought about what our first dance should be to. I wanted it to be to “our” song. She then stated that she had a special request for our first dance, and that she wanted it to be to the Macarena. I thought this would be a pretty funny first dance so I half agreed and started talking about when others could join in. She then stopped me and said she wanted it to be just us, wanted it to be a slow dance, and wanted it to be an a capella version of the song.
I laughed again thinking it was a joke and then she got mad at me and said I wasn’t taking her seriously. No shit. I asked her why the hell she wanted to slow dance to the Macarena and she said it was important to her and her culture (she is Spanish). I said there are many other Spanish songs with far better meanings that we could discuss but no, it must be the Macarena, and it must be a slow dance. I asked her why a slow dance and she said it would be romantic. I don’t think that’s very romantic. I suggested we do a group Macarena after our first dance and she said no, it has to be the first and just us.
We’re at a standstill right now and not really talking. I’m not sure how to resolve this or if I’m being unreasonable. IMO it’s pretty reasonable to not want to slow dance to the Macarena - pretty much in any situation, but especially as our first dance as a married couple. She doesn’t seem to have a good justification for this either.
I’m embarrassed for future me.
Edit: to clarify, the slow dance is the Macarena moves in SLOW MOTION.
So I’m late to the game but catching up. I’m going to binge soon... I’m all caught up on the most recent season
I’ve learned so far about Leida (ew) , Mohammed, etc the couples on pillow talk , Annie ..
But omg Danielle... where do I start ??
She seems a little slow.
But aside from that - and I hate to appearance shame people but how or why did she think a good looking young dude really would want her ? She seems a little Developmentally delayed. I briefly dated a guy who had a sister with development issues. She could have a normal convo for sure but then she would post like 25 selfies of herself on ig (same pic). She was sweet but it was sad
Danielle reminds me of that same kind of developmental delay. Something is just not right there....
And she was so rotten about getting him deported like damn , bitter...
Background: I am moving across continents to my fiancée's country in order to marry her and live together permanently. We are both women. I am 26 and she is 36, and we have been together for four years, mostly long distance, though we have come to visit each other as often as practical for as long as possible. She grew up in a middle class background and is now settled in her career, I grew up in a poor background and am just getting started in mine.
We decided we wanted a small wedding, to cut down on cost and also because our vision for the wedding was one that only people who really genuinely wanted to watch us get married would be there-- no distant cousins or partners of family members we are not close with, who are only coming out of obligation.
I am not close with my family and some of them are homophobic. My entire family is also much poorer than my fiancée's family, and since the wedding is in her home country, they would all need to purchase flights and accommodations for the wedding if they wanted to come. I'm expecting maybe five family members of mine to actually show up to the wedding, plus maybe two close friends of mine and about ten mutual friends I share with my fiancée.
My fiancée's family are wonderful and accepting of everything. I love her parents. I am so excited to be a part of her family. But she is putting a lot more people on the invite list than I thought she would-- parents, siblings, grandparents, aunts, uncles, cousins... She is putting maybe fifty people on the invite list (a total of ~67 people expected to come so far).
It is great she has such a happy family. However, thinking about how completely unbalanced the wedding is going to be, with her whole family there and me with just a few close intimates, makes me feel like a total outcast. It would make me feel so much better to have a truly small wedding with just our intimates on either side, like twenty-thirty people total.
I told my fiancée that seeing how many people she's inviting makes me feel left out and like the wedding will be unbalanced, and that I will barely know anyone there. She said her family is important to her. I said I know and I'm excited to be part of it (I'm taking her name, too) but I'd feel better if she could keep it mostly to immediate family. She started crying, and I tried to comfort her, but she went to bed unhappy. AITA?
Okay this one sounds bad but hear me out (famous last words on AITA; I know). First off, I’m a lesbian. My fiancée Kate’s brother Charlie ID’s as a transwoman. He lives with their parents. I initially met Charlie about 7-8 years ago; he was 15 and gay then. At about 19 he became friends with this 16yo girl who is every LGBT-Tumblr-related nightmare of a stereotype you can imagine, and I say that as someone who is gay myself. He joined her friend group of similarly extreme teenagers and started dating her and calling himself pansexual. He got anxiety before every date and they never kissed.
He kept these friends and about 3 years later he met a polyamorous FtM and they briefly dated. Lo and behold, just as he was suddenly pansexual after dating the pansexual girl, after dating someone trans he was trans too. His mother talked with him about it and he basically thinks that wanting to do feminine things means he’s a woman. He has told me he doesn’t have dysphoria and that he doesn’t need it to be trans. Now he’s on hormones and frankly he’s become a total nightmare of a person. I pointed out the sexism of his beliefs about women once and that devolved into him yelling at me over and over again to shut the fuck up. Once I slipped up and made a joke in the vein of “oh its 3 girls vs 1 guy” while playing a video game and I got read the riot act about how I was being really shitty. So after those incidents, I was getting pretty sick of having to be around him at all, because it’s obviously not fun to tiptoe around someone or to get yelled at.
This has gone on for a year, and the final straw was a few days ago. I write YA books for lesbians for a living and that's something that's very close to my heart because when I was growing up I didn't have any books like that to help me feel less alone so I wanted that to change. He texted Kate asking to borrow books, specifically asking for romances about young teen lesbians. He is 23. I thought it was so creepy, and when I told Kate so, she agreed completely and ignored him, but he's asked her two more times since and evidently won't let it go.
Anyways, I just know we will fight the instant anything about these issues comes up, and it seems to keep coming up every time I visit nowadays. And while I think he's become awful to be around, and I'm not sure I care too much about maintaining a relationship any longer, I want to generally keep the peace with Kate’s family, who I have known for so long now and will know for th
... keep reading on reddit ➡My fiancée and I have been engaged for a few months and dating for the past 3 years. We graduated college in December (a semester early). She's in grad school and I'm working at a bank.
She has always dressed casually, loose T-shirts and jeans for every occasion. She has one very worn button down shirt for occasions. She's worn it to weddings, company parties, and other events where she is very underdressed. It's a bit embarrassing at times, especially since I've seen my coworkers and relatives snickering about her.
I've offered to buy her clothes and take her shopping, but she says no. I don't know the slightest thing about women's clothes or I would've surprised her with a dress or something. I'm not asking her to be a fashionista, just to dress appropriately.
She's joked about getting married in the button down and I'm half afraid she isn't joking. When I talk to her about it, she insists its not a problem and that people are superficial. She also says that no one would look at her either way.
Anything I can do?
tl;dr: fiancée is always underdressed and wears the same shirt to any 'formal' occasion. I've never seen her in a skirt or blouse, let alone a nice dress.
