my french friend was showing me his yachts, he said “this is Un, this is Deux, this is Trois, this is Quatre, this is Six.” confused, I asked, “where’s the fifth?” he looked out at the sea and said
What has four letters, but has three letters, and always has six letters?
I've had a gym membership for six months now and I haven't lost a single kilo
I'm going to go down there in person tomorrow, to find out what's really going on.
My friend died last week. He was working at the brewery when he fell into one of the vats and drowned six hours later.
He would have died much sooner, but he got out of the vat thrice to take a pee.
The teacher asked Little Jimmy, “if I give you 4 cats today and 2 more tomorrow, how many cats will you have?” Little Jimmy said, “Seven” The teacher said, “no Jimmy, four plus two equals six. Why did you say seven? Little Jimmy said,
“Because I already have a cat.”
If you have five cans of beer in your left hand and six cans of beer in your right hand, what do you have?
If you have five oranges in one hand and six oranges in the other, what do you have?
A study has shown that women who get married at this time of year have a penchant for violence, and are six times as likely to murder their spouse
Beware the brides of March
I've been working out a lot so I can gain a six pack. So far it's only a one pack and its not very big :(
What's green, has six legs, and if it fell out of a tree it'd kill you?
What's six inches long, has a bald head and every woman loves?
A hundred dollar bill.
This is my dad's favorite joke.
A police officer came up to me yesterday and said, "Where were you between four and six?"
What's three inches wide, six inches long, and makes women scream with ecstasy?...
A stack of hundred dollar bills.
What has six legs and feathers?
I have six goldfish named Major, Minor, Flat Nine, Bebop, Altered, and Blues.
The only way I can tell them apart is by their scales.
A sketchy guy just came into my shop and bought six smoke machines. So I called the cops.
He must be a part of some extreme mist group.
Every morning for the past six months, I announce loudly to my family that I’m going for a jog, and then I don’t.
It’s my longest running joke of this year.
I finally kicked out my girlfriend about six months ago, and it's been nothing but Happy Days for me since.
The bitch took all the other box sets.
What does my six year old and an old British car have in common?
They both love to stall when you need to go somewhere.
A man named six gave his friends three and five some chocolate bars. Three got 7 chocolate bars and five got eight of them. Three was upset he had less than five did, and five was sad that his friend was sad, so he asked six if three could have another chocolate bar.
He gave one to three for five
I have six eyes, two mouths and three ears, what am I?
My friend asked me to go to the store and get six cans of Sprite.
I realized when I got home that I had picked 7 up.
What has 4 letters, sometimes 9 letters, never has 5 letters, and always has six letters.
What do the movies titanic and the six sense have in common
I asked my nephew how old his dad was and he replied "six". I said "how can he only be six if you're six"?
He said "because he's only been a dad since I was born"
Credit:
u/Alphawolf227
A six sided man walks into a bar and orders a gon.
The bartender says, "What the heck's a gon?"
My toddler was counting his fingers, and determined he had six.
I said “oh, well let me take one of those off your hands for you”
French guy, showing off his yacht collection: This is Un. Here is Deux, Trois, Quatre and, finally, Six.
Her: Where is the 5th?
French guy: Cinq.
My friends and I had a six day pun-fest with nothing but hair jokes.
imgur.com/a/DocF1
A guy walks up to the convenience store counter and tries to buy a six pack with a fake $20 bill.
The elderly woman clerk quickly realized it was fake and became enraged!! She started screaming, grabbed his hair and slammed his head on the counter until he was out cold.
She was SO upset she had a counter fit.
So, I was walking with my wife on the street, and we saw 6 six guys beating up my mother-in-law
Wife yells: Hey, aren't you going to help??
Me: No, six should be enough
What has six wheels and flies?
Why did the horny student take six years of philosophy and six years of law?
I have two boys, five and six.
We're no good at naming things in our house.
How did mary and Joseph know that jesus weighed 7 pounds and six ounces
They had a weigh in a manger
The doctor read my X-ray and said that I can't laugh for six weeks.
He told me I broke my humerus bone.
My six year old daughter just dadjoked Jem and the Holograms
Character on tv: "I'm scared!"
My daughter with a big grin waves at the tv and says "Hi, Scared!"
What has six hands, six legs and six eyes?
Every morning for the past six months, I announce loudly to my family that I'm going for a jog, and then I don't.
It's my longest running joke of the year.
A sketchy guy came into my store and bought six smoke machines. So I called the cops.
He must be part of some extreme mist group.
I asked my nephew how old his dad was and he said “six” and I said that can’t be possible your six
He then said “he’s been a dad since I was born”
A sketchy guy just came into my shop and bought six smoke machines. So I called the cops.
He must be a part of some extreme mist group.
A sketchy guy just came into my shop and bought six smoke machines, so I called the cops...
I think he must be a part of some extreme mist group...
I have six eyes, three ears, and two mouths. What am I?
What has six wheels and flies?
A Bin Lorry. (Garbage Truck)
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